


A Monster Of A Deal

by Mumblings_Of_A_Dreamer



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alcohol, Arguments, Brief mentions of suicide, Emotional Manipulation, Flashbacks, Gen, Graphic Description of Injuries, Graphic depictions of anxious thoughts, Hurt/Comfort, Magic!AU, Mentions of Death, Multi, Panic Attacks, Scars, Semi graphic violence, Steven Universe References, Swearing, Unhealthy Friendship, Vague descriptions of torture, Yelling, alcohol mention, because sometimes I forget to update tags, check tumblr for full content warnings, puns, sometimes it takes a while but comfort eventually comes, tags will be added as the story progresses, witch!AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-29
Updated: 2019-07-18
Packaged: 2019-07-20 09:07:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 81,945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16134101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mumblings_Of_A_Dreamer/pseuds/Mumblings_Of_A_Dreamer
Summary: Virgil was frantically pacing his room, pulling at his hair, glancing between all the words surrounding him. Words on his laptop, which sat opened on the couch with many tabs open and overlapping each other. Words on the many, too many, books lying open on the floor, the table, the couch. Words on the scattered papers and notebooks he had scribbled in. Words on the wall, where the highlights of his research had been pinned in an arrangement that would make any Tumblr theorist proud. Words in a language few knew of and even fewer speak, a fact that would normally bring him comfort but now only brought frustration. And then he looked at the number. The horrible, circled date on the calendar on his wall that he had been refusing to look at. Because Virgil had one month. One month before everything caught up with him. One month before everything would fall apart. It all had started with a simple deal. A simple, selfless agreement. But now, now that simple transaction is going to destroy him.Now Virgil Sanders had one month to make himself disappear. All for a simple deal. But then again, things are never that simple are they?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello Lovelies! This work started on my tumblr (same name as this account), but due to a few requests I have finally set up an AO3 account! If you're here from my tumblr, great! Enjoy the organization and ease of access. If you're new, welcome! Check tags for trigger warnings, check tumblr for life or delay updates, and feel free to comment if you like what you see! Constructive criticism is also appreciated. Now, without further delay, enjoy the story!

December 12th, 2013 11:40 PM

Anxiety stood staring at the large mouth of the cave. He had snuck into Creativity’s area of the mindscape the moment the Royal had fallen asleep. The side knew that surely, he had some sort of plan in his head when he began his long walk through the dark forest surrounding the imaginary kingdom, but when he finally arrived at his desired destination, his mind totally blanked. And then came the thoughts. _What if this is a mistake? What if they say no? What if they attack him? What if they KILL him? What if what if whatif-_ **_no._ ** No he couldn’t listen to that right now. He has a job to do. And so with deep breaths and a new resolve, Anxiety stepped into the darkness. At first, all he saw was black, until eventually he came upon a large room like area of the cave. There were jagged stalagmites and torches lining the walls, but that was not what had the dark side’s attention. No, he was focused on the center of the room, where a red scaled dragon with emerald eyes sat atop a throne of gold. The shadowling shuffled his feet and cleared his throat, glancing between the dragon and the floor.

 

“Dragonwitch,” he said, the words somewhere between a statement and a question.

 

“Anxiety,” the witch replied in greeting, a smirk on their face, “a pleasure to finally meet face to face. I was beginning to worry you would never visit.”

 

“W-what?” Anxiety was stunned, he hadn’t planned for that kind of reaction. But he couldn’t let them know that, so with a well practiced smirk he covered up his initial slip up with quick remark, “Why would I visit some dumb fantasy created by an over the top prince?”

 

“You tell me. You’re here aren’t you?” Shit. He forgot that. Well, he might as well get to the point. _Just say it quick. Like ripping off a band aid._

 

“You tried to kill Creativity.” This earned a laugh from the beast.

 

“The prince and I are enemies, of course I tried to kill him.” That earned a glare from Anxiety.

 

“Yeah well, you can be enemies with him in a less lethal way. In case you haven’t noticed, I’m _trying_ to keep these morons alive. And as much as I hate him Thomas needs him.” Not the best retaliation but at this point he was just getting annoyed. But the dragonwitch just appeared to be more amused.  

 

“Really? You could’ve fooled me. The only villain the prince seems to want dead more than me is you. Surely you feel the same way towards him?” _Ouch._ Well that stung. The extravagant side was not shy when it came to his opinion, so it’s not like anxiety didn’t know this already. However, it still hurt to have it verbalized by someone else. But it did explain the beast’s friendliness towards anxiety. The witch believed Anxiety was on their side, and if that’s what the beast wanted to think then anxiety will let them.

 

“Well of course I hate him,” The emo lied. “Which is why if anyone’s going to get the opportunity to beat his ass it should be me. So back off. The prince is mine.” There, that should sound intimidating.

 

“Please,” the dragon witch chuckled, “if _you_ wanted the Prince dead he would be gone already. We both know that he’s an idiot and with your alertness it would be easy for you to get the drop on the arrogant fool.” Or not. Well now anxiety didn’t know what to think. Did the dragonwitch think anxiety hated creativity or did they know he cared? Were they just teasing him?

 

“Anxiety I know why you came here,” The dragonwitch announced. “You wish to protect the Prince. Why you wish to protect the one who wishes to kill you is a mystery, but in the end I suppose I do not care. If you want me to refrain from killing him you must give me something in return.” Something in return? That statement set off a million alarm bells in Anxiety’s head and _what if_ situations began flying through his head. But if this is what he must do to save Prince, and by extension Thomas, then he was willing to try anything. Anything to keep the other sides safe.

 

“Alright fine,” Anxiety started, “I’ll listen to your terms on one condition.” The dragonwitch raised an eyebrow but nodded for him to continue. “This deal not only protects prince, but the others as well. Morality, Logic, and Creativity are not to be harmed.” Anxiety finished with what little confidence he had in him. They would be protected, he was not wavering on that condition.

 

“Hmm,” The beast thought carefully. “I will agree that I will not kill any of them, however if I were to stop fighting back against The Prince’s attacks all together he would kill me. Or at the very least he would get suspicious. And something tells me you don’t want the others to learn about this little agreement of ours.” Anxiety internally sighed. Of course he didn’t want the others to find out. It would ruin his whole “dark persona” thing and the others would find out he’s weak. Then they would pity him and that’s ( _almost_ ) worse than hatred. But then again this meant the witch could still hurt them. And that wasn’t exactly an ideal situation either. But then again…

 

“What do you want from me in return?” A pleased yet unsettling smile appeared on the dragon’s face

 

“To put a curse on you,” they said. “The curse will not kill you, but it will change you. It will take effect four years from now, no latter and no sooner.” The dragonwitch continued to explain the specifics of the curse, and the more they spoke the more tense Anxiety became. He couldn't agree to this. There's no way he could do this. Not this. _Anything but_ \- Then he remembered how Creativity had stumbled into the common areas two days ago, covered in his own blood. Anxiety had heard Morality’s screams and immediately came running. But he had froze at the sight of the Prince’s body, and hid before any of the others noticed his presence. He couldn’t let that happen again. He had to protect them. He needed to make sure they're safe. But maybe there was another way. Maybe-

 

“By the way, just to be clear if you do not agree to the deal I will kill the Prince and all the other sides.” Anxiety froze.

 

“What?!” They couldn't do that. They couldn't just demand that out of nowhere.

 

“Well it makes sense doesn't it?” They asked with mock politeness and obliviousness. “Part of the deal is that I do not kill them, and you refuse to make the deal. Then it would only make sense to kill them. Otherwise there would be no reason for you to agree.” Anxiety thought it over. The Dragon had a point, but that didn’t mean Anxiety liked it, nor did it stop him from freaking out. He had backed himself into a corner. He had to make the deal.

 

“Fine,” Anxiety said. “I get four years right?” The dragonwitch grinned and suddenly a green mist filled the room, engulfing the dragon. Anxiety took a couple quick steps back in alarm, but the mist disappeared as soon as it came. And walking out of the remains of the fog was a person, who stood about three inches taller than him. The individual had dark red hair with a streak of purple, and their wizard like clothes had the same color scheme as their scales. Anxiety knew who it was the moment he saw the cat like green eyes.

 

“So, do we have a deal,” The Witch asked, extending their hand to the dark trait. Anxiety froze for a fraction of a second, then he lunged forward, taking their hand in his. He wouldn’t find out until later, but they shook hands as the clock struck midnight.


	2. Chapter 2

June 2nd, 2014 2:36 AM

Once again, Anxiety found himself staring at the entrance of the dreaded cave. He hadn’t originally planned on ever returning, but a thought had occurred to him a week ago that he simply couldn’t get out of his head. It was one of the few times he left his corner of the mindscape, and he had only wanted to check on something. But he somehow stumbled upon an argument between Creativity and Logic. He has long since forgotten what the argument was about but one thing the teacher said stood out to him.  _ “Nice try Prince, but an agreement is only legally binding if it is written out in the form of a contract, and I have signed no such thing.”  _ Sure this may have been a desperate attempt to get out of whatever crazy idea the prince had,  _ but what if it wasn’t.  _

 

And so here Anxiety stood, frantically trying to focus on why he was here and not how this could all go terribly wrong. Once again Anxiety stepped through the darkness until he reached the large room of the cave. Only this time it was not a dragon he faced, but an empty mountain of gold. He cautiously crept around the wall of the cave until he saw a section of the room that was previously blocked. In the very back, there was an area with a lower ceiling that contained a living space that seemed to inhabit a more human figure. It was like another cave had been dug into the wall of the cave. There were old, wooden bookshelves along the walls, the only wall space that was visible contained a black door, surrounded by green engravings of symbols that Anxiety didn’t recognize. To the left, in front of the shelves and facing the mouth of the cave, was a desk and a large, throne like chair behind it. Sitting in the chair, was the dragonwitch themself, nose buried in a book. 

 

Anxiety stood staring for a moment, unsure of what he was supposed to do in this situation. Eventually he decided to clear his throat to get the witch’s attention. Unfortunately, this startled the magic user more than either parties expected and suddenly Anxiety had a sword seconds away from stabbing him, and his dagger was at the other’s throat. Both of them froze, realizing what they were doing and who they were doing it too. 

 

“A-anxiety,” the witch breathed out, lowering their sword. “What on earth are you doing here at this hour?” Anxiety lowered his dagger as well, suddenly very embarrassed and regretting life. 

 

“W-well, I uh,” What was he supposed to say now? His question seemed so trivial. _What if they got mad and decided to kill him anyway?_ _What if-_ No, no _we are not doing this now._ He is here because he must protect Thomas. And in order to protect Thomas, he must protect the sides. He repeated this like a mantra in his head as he continued with his question. “I wanted to know if our deal was in writing.”

 

“In writing?” The witch repeated, clearly bewildered by this inquiry. “Well of course it’s in writing. It’s a contract after all. You do remember what I told you about the symbol on your back?” Anxiety nodded well,  _ anxiously _ because yes the symbol was explained to him but he wasn’t convinced it was enough. The symbol in question, was a marking that had appeared on Anxiety’s back, just between the bottom of his shoulder blades the moment he and the witch shook hands. According to the witch, the symbol is their signature, a physical reminder of their deal that prevents either party from backing out. The dragonwitch sighed after Anxiety nodded, before walking back behind the desk and rummaging through one of the drawers. 

 

“I assume this visit means you want me to show you the document,” they said as they pulled a piece of parchment out of the drawer and laid it on the desk. “I will let you, of course, but I doubt it will comfort you much.” And the witch was correct, for the contract was written in a strange set of symbols that Anxiety didn’t understand. The same type of symbols that were on the door.

 

“What is that, Chinese?” The question came with a raised eyebrow and it’s reply was a clear expression of indignation.

 

“ _ No _ it isn’t Chinese you moron,” Anxiety barely held back a flinch at the tone. “It’s the witch language. Anything said or written with power in our language infuses the words with magic.”

 

“So,” the dark trait held out the end of his word as he collected the courage to continue. “How am I supposed to know that what’s written is really the deal we agreed on?” The witch huffed as they collapsed back into their chair.

 

“You don’t.” Unfortunately for the both of them, that answer wasn’t gonna cut it. And so, Anxiety hopped up and took a seat on the desk as he spoke without thinking.

 

“Then teach me.” For a moment the Dragonwitch just stared. It was late at night, surely they were dreaming? 

 

“Teach you? You mean teach you the entire magic language? Something no non magical human has been taught, a language that takes months, maybe years to master, all so you can read this one piece of paper?” Well, once it was said out loud like that Anxiety supposed it did sound silly, and hard work was never something he enjoyed. However, his hatred for hard worked was outweighed by his fear of failure. 

 

“Sure, why not?” Anxiety smirked, now radiating false confidence. “I mean it can’t be that difficult, and who knows when that will come in handy?” There was a deep sigh from the witch. They weren’t dreaming. 

 

“Fine, fine. If you wanna learn that badly I suppose I can teach you.” Anxiety shot them a suspicious look as they paused. “For a price.” And then Anxiety audibly groaned. 

 

“Come now,” they chuckled, “you didn’t really think I’d do it for free did you?”

 

“Ughhhh, what do you want?” Anxiety pouted, getting bolder now that he knew the witch wasn’t gonna kill him on the spot.

 

“Hmm… How about this? I’ll teach you the language if you let me also teach you magic.” Anxiety didn’t know what he was expecting, but it certainly wasn’t that.

 

“Why the hell would you want to do that?” He genuinely couldn’t think of one reason the witch would have for teaching him magic. Well, no good reasons anyway.  _ What if they want to trick him? What if the magic kills him? What if this changes their previous deal? What if they try to get him to join them? What if-   _ The witch awkwardly coughed, trying to get the emo’s attention. Anxiety hadn’t even noticed him speaking.

 

“I  _ said  _ I want to teach you because it will come in handy after you follow through on your side of the deal. It will make the process easier for both of us.” Anxiety internally shivered at that. He didn’t even want to consider what that meant. But he supposed learning magic couldn’t  _ really _ be that bad. He was already in this mess, might as well take advantage of it. So this time, it was Anxiety that held out his hand.

 

“Deal?”

“Deal.”  

* * *

 

June 5th, 2014 3:21 AM

Morality stood up and stretched, his joints cracking. Thomas had meant to go to bed hours ago, but of course that hadn’t had happened. He came very close though, Logic and Creativity were both sleeping soundly, but Thomas had stayed up reading through comments and posts from fans online, and obviously that filled him with emotion so of course the fatherly trait was wide awake. Wide awake, and craving chocolate it seemed. So, still dressed in his cat onesie, he stepped into the dimly lit kitchen. Except, the moment he got to the doorway he froze, seeing a dark clothed figure reaching into one of the cabinets. It took him only a moment to realize who it could be.

 

“Heya kiddo!” Morality stumbled backwards a few steps as Anxiety jumped ten feet in the air. When the emo turned to face him, Anxiety had one cookie in his mouth, two in his hand, and his other hand was reaching for a fourth. Which would be amusing if it weren’t for the fact that Anxiety looked like a train wreck. His hair was all over the place, the make up on his face was messed up like he had been crying, and he was trembling in what Morality could only assume was fear. “Anxiety?” It seemed to be the only thing the heart could say. Anxiety quickly removed the cookie from his mouth as he began to speak.

 

“M-morality! W-what are you doing up?” Despite Anxiety’s best efforts, Morality could hear the tremor in his voice. 

 

“Couldn’t sleep. Are you alright?” Morality wasn’t sure what to do. He had never seen the darker trait like this, normally Anxiety stayed hidden in his room. Now that he thought about it, the only time he had  _ ever  _ seen Anxiety was when the emo felt the need to point out what the others were doing wrong. Morality’s heart broke,  _ what on earth could have upset the poor thing?  _

 

“Y-yeah,” Morality could already sense the oncoming lie. “O-of course I’m alright. Just uh, just g-getting a late night snack.” Well that was officially the worst lie Morality had ever heard. But it was clear Anxiety wasn’t gonna talk without a bit of leverage and assurance.

 

“Hmm,” He knew he had to word this very carefully. “How about this? I’ll make you a fresh batch of cookies while you have a seat and tell me what’s bothering you?” Anxiety narrowed his eyes.

 

“But I said-” 

 

“And I’m going to forgive you for lying just this once because it’s pretty obvious you haven’t had a good day.” Anxiety blushed and stared at the floor.

 

“...Is it that obvious?” Oh god he sounded like he was going to cry, which was bad because Morality knew if  _ he  _ started then morality would start and then both of them would be a mess. For a moment, Morality almost forgot that it was Anxiety standing in front of him. Anxiety, who was always bold and loud and full of sarcasm and snark, was now standing there in the middle of the night, looking so vulnerable and just so  _ broken _ . Morality gave him a sad smile and moved to get the instant cookies from the freezer.

 

“Cookies first, heartfelt conversation later. Deal?” Morality immediately regretted those words as he realized that  _ oh dear that had been the wrong response.  _ Anxiety visibly tensed and resumed his trembling. “O-or not! You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to! How about we just stick with cookies for now?” The dark side relaxed at those words, if only slightly. But Anxiety bit his lip and nodded at him, so Morality decided that slightly was enough. 

 

So the two of them made cookies. Morality stood next to the oven, rambling about anything and everything. How his day went, what kinds of dogs he saw online, his favorite shows, how the fans reacted to the prince character in the recent vine, what his plans were for tomorrow, whatever light hearted topics that came to his head flowed out of his mouth. And Anxiety listened. He sat on the counter, just silently listening until eventually his tense expression relaxed into something between a half smile and an amused smirk. And if Anxiety had let a few grateful tears slip, or giggled at one of the sunny side’s puns, or maybe even told a pun himself in response, Morality wasn’t about to break his trust by telling anyone. And maybe,  _ just  _ maybe, things weren’t as bad as Anxiety thought.


	3. Chapter 3

September 14th, 2014 12:03 AM

“Oh come on Anxiety, it’s not that big of a deal!” Anxiety had been studying with the dragonwitch for a little over three months now, and nothing’s gone disastrously wrong yet. But it seemed like the pair had hit a wall.

 

“There is no way we are going  _ outside  _ and casting  _ spells _ .” Anxiety was now pacing in front of the witch as they stood against the wall of the cave next to the entrance.  _ How could they just stand there so casually?  _ “There are way too many ways this could all go wrong.”  _ What if his magic goes haywire and kills him? What if he can't get the magic to work and he gets embarrassed? What if it makes a lot of noise and wakes up Creativity? What if-  _

 

“Ann, I swear to god if you keep pacing I’m going to levitate you out this door. You’re going to pace a hole in my floor.” The witch was now tapping their foot, arms crossed in clear irritation. “There is no reason to be  _ this  _ concerned. The only one who is really at risk in this situation is me.” The witch attempted to mumble the last part, but Anxiety heard it loud and clear. 

 

“How are you the one in danger? I thought I was the one doing the magic?” Anxiety couldn’t think of a reason the witch would be in danger. Magic is their specialty, how could it hurt them? The witch sighed heavily, as if they could hear the question in Anxiety’s head. 

 

“Exactly,  _ you’re  _ the one using the magic, meaning your magic is going to be coming at me. Plus, the purpose of this lesson is to wake your magic up, so it will be very unstable.” Anxiety started walking towards his mentor, now listening intently. The two began walking outside as the witch began their explanation of magic.

 

“Ann, do you remember what I told you about spells?” 

 

“Uhh, you said spells don’t create magic, they control it, right?” The witch smiled.

 

“Very good, do you know what I meant by that?” Anxiety shakes his head. “It means that once your magic wakes up it becomes raw energy that will constantly be at your disposal, but if you don’t know how to control it, it begins to do things on its own.” Anxiety’s eyes went wide in horror.

 

“So magic stuff will just, just happen?!” The witch chuckled their student’s distress. 

 

“It depends on how powerful you are, really. I’m not completely sure how much magic blood is in Thomas’s veins and I have no way of knowing how much of that magic is given to you, but considering none of you have woken up yet I’d say it can’t be too bad.” The pair were now standing in a field not far from the cave when Anxiety suddenly stopped.

 

“Wait, you mean the reason me and the others can use magic is because Thomas is part witch?” His mentor rolled their eyes.

 

“Of course that’s why you can use magic. It’s why I exist. I already told you magic is genetic didn’t I?” Anxiety was very glad he remembered to put on his makeup or he would be blushing in embarrassment. The witch had gone over this in one of their many nights of lessons, but for some reason Anxiety hadn’t made the connection until now.  _ Probably because he’s not a genius like Logic.  _ Anxiety couldn’t help the thought coming to his mind, and oh god now he was blushing even harder.  _ Thank god for foundation.  _

 

“Now then, how about we get started?” The witch looked at Anxiety expectantly, but the emo had tensed up once again. They were starting now? Just like that? He didn’t even know what to do.  _ What if- _

 

“No. No way. You haven’t even explained what we’re doing!” Anxiety was officially starting to freak out, but he couldn’t let the witch know that. 

 

“We’re waking up your magic,” The Dragon witch said that far too calmly. “I thought I already explained that?” 

 

“Y-yeah but you didn’t explain how.” Something was off. He didn’t know what exactly,  _ but there was something _ . Anxiety could tell. He could always tell. It was his job. He always knew when danger was coming and this was giving him some seriously bad vibes.

 

“Well… I’ll be honest,” That was never a good sentence starter. “If it was anyone else doing this, I’d have already been going over a simple spell with them. But since it’s you, the literal embodiment of anxiety, we’re going to have to do this a bit more…  _ abruptly _ .” And just like that, Anxiety was wrapped in glowing green chains. Anxiety could already feel the adrenaline rushing through his veins as he froze. He’d made a mistake.

 

“W-What are you doing?! Let me go!” But the witch wasn’t listening, they simply walked to the other side of the field. Meanwhile the chains began to tighten around Anxiety, further constricting his movement. And the more trapped Anxiety was, the more his instincts began to take over.  _ Trapped. Trapped Trapped. I’m trapped.  _ He didn’t realize he was still screaming. _ I need to escape. I need to run. I need to fight. I’m going to die. Trapped. Dying. Escape. Escape.  _ **_Escape._ ** He realized he couldn’t move.  _ Fight or flight?  _ A green mist surrounded him, his vision blurring.  _ Escape. Fight or flight?  _ The chains were tighter. He couldn’t breath. Was he breathing?  _ Dying. Escape. Fight or Flight?  _ He had to move. He had to make a decision.  _ Fight or flight?  _ All his senses intensified.  _ Fight or flight?  _ His vision sharpened.  _ Fight or Flight?  _ His gaze locked onto the dragonwitch.  **_Fight._ **

 

“ **I said, LET. ME. GO!”** Anxiety’s voice became horribly distorted. White hot pain shot through his veins like liquid electricity, and then all he saw was purple light.

 

The dragonwitch knew that this plan was risky, but they also knew fear would have prevented Anxiety from making any real progress, so they decided it was a necessary risk. Besides, Anxiety couldn’t be  _ that  _ powerful. And so the witch had been confident in their plan when the two of them walked onto the field. They remained confident as they used their magic to trap Anxiety. They remained confident when Anxiety began to freak out. They remained confident when Anxiety screamed and fought for mercy. They remained confident, right up to the moment the lightning struck. Anxiety’s screams had paused for only a moment, before his voice returned stronger and distorted to the point of unrecognizability. But the witch didn't have time to think about the voice, because as the side shouted the last syllable, bright purple and white lightning lit up the night sky. It was that moment the witch realized that Anxiety was far more powerful than either of them anticipated. And that  _ oh god they fucked up.  _ The witch wasted no time rushing to the cover of the trees as a full force lightning storm began: rain, thunder, and all. As they ran they created an illusion to make it appear that they were still standing where they were previously. Once they were under the cover of trees they looked back at Anxiety, only to see that he had broken free of all of their enchantments, and that his eyes were glowing bright purple. Anxiety, now engulfed in a purple and black aura, lifted his arm and suddenly the fake witch was pelted in blindingly bright lightning. The real dragonwitch shivered to think what would have happened if they failed to move. 

 

For a while, the witch just crouched there watching as Anxiety screamed and electrified everything in sight. He had already set fire to several trees, and if it wasn’t raining as hard as Anxiety was hitting the witch would’ve been worried about starting a forest fire. It was the most brutal storm the witch had ever seen, and it didn’t appear to be slowing down anytime soon. So they hid and they watched as the side tired himself out. Eventually, after nearly an hour had passed, the storm began to let up a little, and Anxiety passed out on the ground. Once the witch was certain that they weren’t about to be struck by lightning, they walked out and levitated Anxiety back to their room. This was going to be a lot more interesting than they thought. 

* * *

 

September 14th, 2014  2:07 PM

Anxiety groaned as he felt himself wake up. His limbs felt heavy and it was difficult for him to even open his eyelids. Slowly,  _ painfully  _ slowly, he opened his eyes, and was alarmed to see that he wasn’t in his room. And he would have been sent straight into a panic attack, except he wasn’t quite awake yet, and even if he was his attention had been captivated by the ceiling above him. Well, he thought it was a ceiling. He could see the edges where ceiling became wall, but the center of the ceiling had been transformed into a swirling galaxy of stars. 

 

“Do you like it?” Anxiety jumped and turned his head to see the dragonwitch sitting in a chair next to the bed. “I made the illusion myself, I enjoy sleeping under the stars. I figured you would as well.” While they clearly meant this as an easy conversation starter, and on any other day Anxiety would have appreciated it, Anxiety wasn’t in the mood for small talk. Not after what happened last night.

 

“What did you do to me?” Anxiety had many questions in his head, but that seemed like the best one at the moment. The witch sighed, as though they were trying to figure out a way to explain it all. They couldn’t seem to look Anxiety in the eye.

 

“Well, how much do you remember?” Anxiety looked away, not completely sure himself.

 

“I…” Anxiety took a deep breath. The witch had shattered what little trust he had. Anxiety had too keep his guard up. He had to keep his tone as apathetic as possible.  _ Think, how does Logic speak? Logic speak and sarcasm.  _ Once he decided on the role he would put on, Anxiety tried to speak again. “I remember walking onto the field. I remember you tying me up. I remember green mist. I remember panicking. And then… then it gets a little fuzzy. After that I just remember… purple light. Purple light, pain, and adrenaline. Then nothing.” He kept his gaze focused on the wall, waiting for the witch’s response.

 

“Well, the pain and light you remember is the moment your magic woke up. Which means it worked.” The witch paused to gauge the side’s reaction, but Anxiety just kept staring at the wall, he refused to give the witch anything. So the witch continued. “I trapped you because there are two ways a witch’s magic blood will awaken. The first is if the witch slowly yet firmly coaxes the magic out of themselves. This takes a lot of focus and training, and no small amount of confidence. Confidence that I doubt you have. So I used the second method. A witch’s magic will often respond to extreme, life threatening danger. Most of Thomas’s problems have been emotional or social dangers, and while those  _ are  _ very important, it’s not something that would have woken up his magic. So, I trapped you. And your magic reacted.” The Anxious side glanced at them. He wanted to know the full story, and the witch’s reasoning made sense. But…  _ they could be lying. They’re probably lying.  _

 

“What do you mean by that?” It didn’t matter if they were lying, they were the only one Anxiety could ask. “What did I do?” The witch cleared their throat, thinking about how to proceed. They had never heard Anxiety speak this coldly before, and to be honest it scared them a little. 

 

“Well… first I would like to clarify that your magic is far more powerful than either of us predicted. You nearly killed me, and  _ did  _ kill quite a few trees.” Anxiety raised an eyebrow, as if prompting them to continue. “It might be easier to just show you.” 

 

“No.” Anxiety’s answer was instant. “That isn’t good enough. Why should I trust you?” Anxiety wasn’t falling for this trick again. They hurt him once, they’ll probably do it again. Somewhere along the line, Anxiety had almost forgotten that this is the villain that almost killed Roman. But then the witch stood up and sighed.

 

“Ann, if I wanted you dead, you would be dead. But instead of dead you are here,” They gestured around the room in frustration, “in my bed. And yes this is my bedroom, if that wasn’t obvious enough. I realize you have trust issues, but if I had told you what I was planning it wouldn’t have worked.” 

 

“That’s not enough!” Anxiety glared, his walls were up now, and they weren’t backing down that easily. The witch took a deep breath, then walked directly in front of Anxiety, meeting his gaze head on. 

 

“Magnus” Shock rippled through Anxiety, but his poker face never slipped. 

 

“What?”

 

“My name,” The witch, Magnus, started softly. “My name is Magnus. I figured that was the only way I could gain your trust. Plus it gets kind of awkward only being referred to as ‘witch’” Anxiety supposed that was true. And it  _ did  _ help lessen his nerves a bit. But not by much.

 

“So, your name is Magnus? Really? I would’ve expected something a bit, I don’t know, fancier? More villainous?” Magnus gave an exasperated sigh before suddenly collapsing onto the bed next to Anxiety, making him jump. 

 

“ _ Yes  _ my name is really Magnus. Although I’d prefer it if you just called me Mag. I use Mag because it’s a bit more gender neutral. It could be Maggie or Magnus, and unless I told someone they’d never know.” Anxiety fidgeted with his hands, and looked down at th- at Mag. It was strange, putting a name to the terrible creature he had somehow befriended. But now that Anxiety looked at them, really looked at them, for the first time since he woke up, he realized how messy their hair was. How their eyes had bags under them. How their clothes were wrinkled and smudged with mud in some areas. Their eyes had fallen shut the moment they hit the bed.  _ God did they stay up watching him all night?  _ Anxiety realized that no, of course he didn’t trust them, but he did respect them. He respected them because while yes, they probably just stayed up to watch him in case his magic destroyed their bedroom, or in case he stole something, or messed something up, they still showed determination to stay up all night and morning watching over him. They were strong, and he could learn from them. So he supposed that if they were gonna get sappy on him, the least he could do is listen.

 

“So Mag, I guess we’re going to the field?” Mag opened their eyes and smiled at him. Then they jumped up, brushed off their clothes, and began to walk out of the room. 

 

Except, when the two got within sight of the field, Anxiety froze in shock. Trees were uprooted and fallen over, there were marks in the ground where grass was gone and dirt was tossed up, some trees looked charred and black, and despite it being the afternoon there were still muddy areas left from the rain water. 

 

“I…  _ I  _ did this?” Mag looked to him and nodded, and the damage only looked worse the further the two walked. 

 

“There is some good news behind this.” Mag tried to be encouraging but Anxiety picked up on their nerves.

 

“ _ How  _ is this good?! It looks like a freakin' war zone, how am I supposed to control this! I don’t even remember it!” His head began to fill with  _ what if _ thoughts again, before Magnus began to speak.

 

“Well for one thing, this is the maximum level of power you can generate without actively trying to push your boundaries.” Anxiety looked at them quizzically, not understanding the situation. “When a witch’s magic is woken up for the first time, using the methods we did, it freaks out and unleashes everything at once without holding anything back. So this is the maximum it will release on its own, and even then it would only release this much in very extreme circumstances.”

 

“So until Princey decides to follow through on his death threats, my magic should behave for the most part?” He said it with a smirk, but he noticed Mag curling their hands into fists. A dry chuckle left their mouth, barely concealed anger lying underneath.

 

“I’d like to see that arrogant ass try to lay a finger on you now.” Ann felt a chill go down his spine. Yes, he and Creativity argue a lot, and Ann didn’t exactly like him, but it was still his job to protect Thomas. And that meant that no matter their differences, Anxiety had to protect the other sides. So it was more than a little unsettling to see the anger in Magnus’s eyes as they cursed Creativity. And it was a stark reminder that Anxiety made a deal with this person because they wanted, and probably still want, to kill the ones he was born to protect. The two of them weren’t friends. The only reason the two of them worked together is because they both have something to gain. 

 

“Speaking of that… what are we gonna do if Creativity finds this?” Mag’s anger faded and they turned to face Ann with a smile. But it still felt  _ wrong. _

 

“Don’t worry Ann, I’ll take care of everything.” Except worrying was what Anxiety did. And even after he headed back to his own area of the mindscape, the sick feeling that had settled in the pit of his stomach never went away.


	4. Chapter 4

September 23rd, 2014 10:00 AM

Creativity woke up that morning feeling refreshed and stress free. He climbed out of bed and walked over to the balcony overseeing his entire kingdom. The sky was clear, people were out talking and trading in the streets below, and orange and yellow colored leaves fluttered about and covered everything in their path. He thought that today would be a good day. A day full of new ideas and inspiring notions. Unfortunately, his original assessment had been wrong. Creativity’s section of Thomas’s mind was a world of possibilities, a world the self proclaimed Prince ruled. Complete with a kingdom, a castle, other villages half a day away, and a massive forest circling and dividing it all. And it was all created by the Prince. Except, the interesting thing about creative thoughts is that they tend to do whatever they please regardless of their creator’s wishes. Which is why the Prince was concerned, but not entirely surprised when something went wrong. 

 

“Your highness!” A guard rushed into the prince’s bedroom, very out of breath. “A messenger has come from one of the smaller villages on the outskirts of the kingdom! She says there’s something wrong with the weather.” The prince raised an eyebrow. Now that was a new one. Creativity had never heard of something going wrong with the weather before, and it was made even stranger by the fact that it seemed to be a perfect day out.

 

“Not to worry,” the prince replied with practiced ease. “Take me to this messenger, I would like to hear more about this peculiar weather change.” The guard immediately turned and walked out, leading Creativity to a young woman clothed in cloths of blues and greens. She was glancing around the main room of the castle, as though she was scared something was 

 

“Your highness,” the woman bowed, suddenly much calmer. Whether she was actually calmed by the royal’s presence or simply a good actor he would never know. “You must come to the Northern village at once.” Creativity grew tense at those words. The Northern village was the one that was closest to the Dragonwitch’s cave, and this wasn’t the first time he had been called to save them. But he kept his anger on a tight leash in front of his subjects, and acting was one of his best talents. 

 

“What happened this time?” Creativity said. He already knew who was behind this, but formalities had to be kept and he might as well get as much information as possible.

 

“For the past week a field in the forest has been plagued by violent lightning and thunderstorms. But that’s not the weirdest part…” The woman stopped, suddenly glancing around again. She fidgeted with her hands a bit. 

 

“It’s alright, I’ve seen some strange stuff myself. Whatever it is I’ll believe you.” The prince tried to comfort her. He had a feeling that this was magic, all he needed was a bit more evidence. 

 

“Well… the lightning, it was purple.” That… was not the answer Creativity was expecting. He had never heard of the witch’s magic being purple, but it proved that this was magic so he supposed it didn’t matter. He was about to thank her and head off, but she continued speaking. “N-not just purple though. Sometimes the clouds were black and the lightning purple. Sometimes the clouds are purple and the lightning is white. Most nights it’s a mixture of both. But they’re always sudden. Always in the middle of the night. And they never last more than an hour.” The woman continued to explain the field and the state that someone had found it in yesterday morning. The prince listened intently, and by the end of her explanation he was far more confused than he was before. He couldn’t think of any reason the dragonwitch would just be tearing up a random field but…  _ it couldn’t be anyone else could it? _ So after all the formalities were out of the way, the prince mounted his horse, and started the long ride to the Northern village. 

 

The prince made it to the field about five hours later, and he quickly realized that the woman’s description had not done the damage justice. It looked like the area had been hit with a hurricane and a forest fire at the same time. There were up rooted and charred trees all over the place, and the ground was pure mud at this point.  _ What on EARTH happened here? _ He then realized that with this kind of power, the witch could level a village in seconds. With a renewed sense of rage, the prince hiked straight to the witch’s cave, sword in hand. 

 

“DRAGONWITCH!” Creativity’s voice boomed as be began walking into the darkness of the cave. “Come out and fight me you conniving coward!”  Creativity didn’t anger easily, really he didn’t, but the thought of his subjects being put in danger made his blood boil. He called out again but stopped the moment he stepped into the light of the cave. Creativity’s day just kept getting stranger, because on top of the pile of gold was not the sly, confident, villainous dragon he was used to. Instead there was the usual dragonwitch, fast asleep. For a moment, the prince considered killing them right there and then. But that wouldn’t have been very princely of him, so instead he once again screamed at the dragon to wake up. But they simply rolled over and groaned. 

“Go away your  _ highness _ ,” the dragon sneered. “I am not in the mood to entertain you.” Unbeknownst to Creativity, Mag had learned the hard way that staying up all night every night for a week doing magic training was a bad life decision. But since Creativity did not know that, he exploded in anger.

 

“ _ Entertain me?!  _ I am here because you threatened my people long enough you vile creature!” The prince pointed his sword at the dragon, braced for a battle. That finally got the dragon to look at him, but they simply rolled their eyes. 

 

“I don’t know what delusion you’ve come up with this time but I want no part in it. Come back later, maybe in a couple days.” The prince simply grew more enraged. How could the beast act as though they didn’t know what he was talking about?! 

 

“Delusions?! So you’re saying you have no idea about the field that has been demolished? About the electrical typhoons that have plagued the northern village for over a week?” The dragon’s eyes widened briefly, before narrowing once again.

 

“Oh that? Please, the storms came nowhere  _ near _ those idiots.” Despite the annoyance in the dragon’s voice, the prince heard only an admission of guilt.

 

“So you were the one responsible! You will not escape justice you fiend, for I will-” But the dragon had apparently had enough. A low growl slipped past their lips, before being covered up by a statement drowned in false friendliness. 

 

“Oh drop the dramatics. I was simply experimenting with some new techniques, nothing you need to concern yourself with. But continue testing me and I just might decide to practice my next spell on your precious citizens.” Creativity tensed, he may have made a mistake. But the prince was also running on rage and indignation so the thought of him making an error of this proportion was swept away as quickly as it came. Spell be damned, no one threatened his people and got away with it. 

 

“Ha! Your threats fall on deaf ears you beast! For today is the day I finally slay you, and you will burn for your crimes.” Creativity’s voice boomed confidently throughout the cave, and everything about him radiated confidence. Which in a way, he was. Creativity was confidence and mastery in a talent or field of study. It was who he was. It was who he would always be. The combination of confidence and mastery. And so, with practiced skill and conviction he lunged forward. The dragonwitch roared with outrage when the prince’s sword pierced their front arm. The dragon flew up and sent a nasty bout of fire breath in their opponent’s direction. But the prince simply laughed.

 

“That attack didn’t even come close!” And with that the prince was dashing forward again, but the dragon wasn’t stupid. They created a thick fog and shifted into their more human form. Creativity looked around carefully, trying to spot where the dragon had gone. Until he sensed a presence behind him, and turned just in time to clash blades with the witch. And just like that, the fight dissolved into a mess of sparks and clangs as swords clashed faster than any outsider could have seen. 

 

The fight continued for quite awhile, but the witch remained tired and annoyed. Creativity noticed that the glare never left their face, even when they got a good hit in. They radiated frustration just as Creativity radiated anger. Normally, the witch would have tossed in an evil chuckle or snarky remark by now, but they remained silent. He noticed it, but didn’t think too hard on the abnormality. They were a monster, why should he care what they thought? Eventually, Creativity got the upper hand and launched the witch’s sword into the air. 

 

“Aha! Checkmate Dragonwitch! Time to surrender.” A triumphant smirk grew on the prince’s face, but the witch continued to look at him with that same expression. An uneasy feeling overcame Creativity. He couldn’t place it, but it was enough to make him pause. Shouldn’t the dragonwitch be panicking by now? But instead, the witch let out a deep sigh. 

 

“Well? Have you had enough? Are you satisfied? Done making me your personal punching bag for the day?” The prince faltered for a moment. This wasn’t the dragonwitch he knew, loud and cunning and villainous in every way. This was someone much, much colder. He didn’t know what to say. But apparently he didn’t need to say anything, for the witch had continued speaking.

 

“Look, I normally enjoy our little sparring matches, I do. But I told you to leave me alone, I told you I wasn’t causing any trouble. I wasn’t hurting anyone or doing anything wrong. Unless you consider magic wrong, which would be extremely hypocritical of you. And yet here you are, still trying to kill me. You should know by now that I cannot be killed. I am done playing this game, leave.” Before Creativity had a chance to respond, he found himself standing in the middle of the muddy field. Which was kind of expected,  _ but did they have to drop him in this mud pit? _

 

Confused, muddy, and still a little pissed off Creativity trudged to the Northern Village, where he rented a room at the inn and collapsed. But despite his exhaustion, he couldn’t seem to sleep. The words of the dragonwitch kept floating through his head. He couldn’t figure out what they meant. They weren’t innocent, they deserved to be vanquished. They were the villain and he was the prince. It was his duty to slay the dragon. And they even admitted that they enjoyed it, so what was their problem? And so the prince fell asleep frustrated and confused and questioning existence. 

* * *

 

September 24th, 2014 2:00 AM

“And he just wouldn’t go away and leave me alone!” Mag and Anxiety had decided to skip magic training tonight since both of them were suffering from sleep deprivation. Instead, Mag was currently ranting to Anxiety about their encounter with Creativity. They were pacing back and forth in the area at the back of the cave while Anxiety sat on their desk, nodding and making sounds of affirmation when needed. He wasn’t really paying attention, instead focusing on a spell book Mag and him had been going over. But Anxiety had mastered the art of pretending to be interested, so Mag continued. 

 

“Like I get it, I’m the villain, and I enjoy being the villain. But I haven’t even done anything evil in two weeks!  _ Two. Weeks.  _ And he still comes and tries to kill me!” A nod from Anxiety. “Like, what’s the  _ point _ of playing the part of the villain if he’s just gonna have the same reaction to everything I do! At least wait until I unleash a new evil plan before attacking me.” A hum of affirmation. “You know, for someone meant to embody creativity his attacks are getting rather repetitive.” Mag paused for a moment, finally stopping to notice that their student was reading instead of listening. They were a little bugged, but he had been responding so they supposed that was enough. Instead they decided to ask a question that had been secretly bugging them for months. 

 

“Why do you do that?” Now Anxiety looked up from his book, confusion written on his face. 

 

“Do what?” 

 

“Sit on the desk like that. In all the time I’ve known you, you never sit on any chairs. The closest you ever got is when I dropped you unconscious on my bed.” And it was true. Normally Ann would sit on either Mag’s desk, the floor, or he would just stand. But the only answer Mag received was a shrug. “Oh come on Ann, there’s gotta be a reason.” Anxiety raised an eyebrow, Mag’s curiosity caught him off guard. 

 

“You really wanna know?” Mag sighed, insisting that they wouldn’t have asked if they didn’t want to know. “I find it comforting.” Mag furrowed their eyebrows and gave him a puzzled look. 

 

“How is refusing to sit on a chair comforting?” This was a strange one, even for the two of them. 

 

“Well it’s less that I avoid chairs and more I chose to sit on a surface that isn’t meant to be sat on. Because when tomorrow comes I will be faced with even more challenges, and I am too overwhelmed to be worrying about what ‘is’ and ‘is not’ a chair.” And now Mag regretted asking. A chill had gone down their spine at the drop in Anxiety’s voice as he said that. Mag often forgot that out of all the sides, Anxiety was the most unsettling. The two stayed like that, Mag staring at Ann as he stared at a wall. Until Mag recovered and decided to break the silence with an exclamation that was just a tad too loud.

 

“Welp! I’m going to bed to stare at the ceiling and evaluate life. Goodnight Ann, sleep well.” Anxiety just chuckled as Mag stiffly walked to their room. He remained sitting on the desk for just a moment longer. He wasn’t done with the book he was reading, but at the same time he wanted to go back to his room.  _ Should he just take it?  _ Mag did say they wanted him to read it. After overthinking all of the  _ what if _ scenarios in his mind, he finally decided to just take it. He could always return it tomorrow. 


	5. Chapter 5

December 24th, 2014 11:45 PM

By now Anxiety and Mag had fallen into a familiar routine. One night of studying spells, one night of practicing spells, one night of sleep, and then repeat the process. Tonight was originally a study night but they decided to just hang out instead. 

 

“So what exactly are we gonna do tonight?” Ann was sitting on the desk as per usual as Mag stepped through the door to the rest of his living space. In Mag’s hand, was a wrapped present. “Wait, whoa we’re actually doing like, Christmas stuff?” 

 

“No, moron. I got myself a present ‘cause I knew no one else would get me one.”  Ann raised an eyebrow. If he hadn’t known Mag for this long he would’ve thought that was sarcasm. Once the initial shock wore off, Ann just started chuckling.

 

“Huh, that’s not a bad idea. Maybe I should start doing something like that.” Mag looked at Ann curiously.

 

“What, you mean you haven’t before? You’ve never done anything Christmassy, even by yourself?” The emo just shrugged, he had considered it of course, but never thought he was worthy of Christmas. Or any sort of gifts for that matter. But he wasn’t gonna tell Mag that. 

 

“Eh, never really saw the point of all this holiday stuff. Too cheerful and bright and just another reminder that one more year has gone by, meaning we’re all one year closer to our inevitable deaths.” And once again, Mag regretted asking. They wondered if Ann was scaring them intentionally or if he was just naturally terrifying. Maybe it was a bit of both. 

 

“Are you sure you’re not an evil villain?” Ann just laughed.

 

“Hey, when you’ve been cast in the same role for your whole life you start to get good at it.” Mag’s eyes widened a little at the surprisingly deep comment. But they quickly hid their shock with a laugh. The darkest side was simply full of surprises it seemed. 

 

“Yes, I suppose that’s true.” Mag sat down in his chair and began unwrapping the present. 

 

“Don’t you normally have to wait until midnight?” Mag scoffed.

 

“Do you really think I give a shit about rules at this point?” 

 

“Fair enough.”  Mag continued unwrapping it to reveal a very elaborate makeup kit. It had all sorts of colors and tools, Ann didn’t recognize half of the things in it. 

 

“Oh damn it, this isn’t what I meant to get.” Ann gave Mag a side eye.

 

“I thought you said you got this for yourself?” Mag sighed.

 

“Yes, meaning I cast a spell that grabbed the most valuable thing in the prince’s castle and brought it to me gift wrapped.” Anxiety looked at the kit, to Mag, and then back to the kit, and then he burst out laughing. Mag looked at him grumpily, before they too began laughing.

 

“T-the most expensive thing in h-his castle is a damn ma-makeup kit?!” Ann struggled to get the words out through his laughter. His laughs were few and far between but the absurdity of the situation just made him lose all composure. 

 

“Yeah well, I have no need for makeup, illusion magic is my main remember?” Mag’s chuckles had died out by now and Ann’s laughter was reduced to faint giggles. “Actually, why don’t you take it?” And that killed the last of his giggles.

 

“Wa-wait, really?” So much for not exchanging gifts.

 

“Yeah, and don’t worry there’s no strings attached. This is useless to me so I don’t lose anything by giving it to you. I can just cast another spell and get myself something that actually matters.” Anxiety could tell that Mag meant those words and genuinely didn’t care, but he couldn’t help but feel a little amazed because  _ holy crap someone is actually giving him a Christmas present?? What?  _ And so with extreme and unnecessary care, the dark trait picked up the makeup kit and studied it. It was mostly filled with bright colors but he did see some blacks, purples, blues, and greens that he could make good use of. He let a smirk appear on his face, and with well practiced precision, he lied through his teeth. 

 

“Eh, I don’t really have much interest in makeup either, other than my usual eyeliner, but I can tell Creativity worked hard on this kit and taking it will make him absolutely furious. The look of fury on his face is gonna be priceless.” Mag bought it without a second thought.

 

“And to think I used to wonder why he hated you so much.” Mag snapped his fingers and in his other hand a new present appeared. “Take two.” They said as they began tearing into the wrapping, revealing a gold vase that was filled to the brim with gold coins. Mag grinned, and Ann watched as their eyes changed from their usual emerald green irises to the cat like eyes of a dragon. A wicked grin spread on their face.

 

“Yes, this will do nicely,” they said before tossing the vase onto their pile of gold. 

 

“Oh is that how you got your pile of gold?” Ann asked with a smirk.

 

“Eh, some of it. Some of it is from a village I destroyed ages ago, some is stolen at various times throughout the year. But yeah the bulk of it comes at Christmas.” Anxiety froze at the mention of a village being destroyed, but decided that mentioning it could put his safety at risk. So instead he just make a noise of acknowledgement before changing the subject.

 

“So, anything else planned for tonight or are we just gonna go to bed?” Mag shrugged.

 

“I don’t have anything particularly thrilling planned, other than drink eggnog and read. You can join me if you’d like or you can go back to your room and enjoy your Christmas by yourself. It’s up to you.” Originally, Ann was going to just go back to his room so he could just sleep the day away and forget Christmas existed, but there was one phrase that rubbed him the wrong way.  _ Did he really want to spend another Christmas alone in his room ~~crying~~ sleeping away his l ~~oneliness~~ frustration? _

 

“Eh, if you’re drinking eggnog I might as well hang out here and make sure you don’t go on a drunken rampage.” Mag grew a smirk to match the emo’s and snapped two glasses of eggnog into existence.

 

“Actually, alcohol shuts down a witch's magic.” Ann’s eyes went wide.

 

“Wait, seriously? Why?” Mag smiled, it seemed they were doing a study night anyway. 

 

“Alcohol tends to slow the body down, right? For humans the first thing to go is their ability to focus. For witches it’s magic. This actually results in it taking longer for a witch to be intoxicated than a human.” Ann picked up his glass of eggnog, looking at it curiously.

 

“That’s… actually kinda cool.” Mag smiled before taking a sip of their eggnog. Once Ann was sure that Mag had taken a sip, he also drank some of it. Only to start coughing it up and spitting it back into the glass. Mag looked at him in alarm.

 

“Holy- Ann are you alright?” Once Anxiety’s coughing fit had died down a bit, he frantically attempted to nod. After a couple more moments of trying to collect himself, he tried to speak.

 

“What the fuck is in this?” Mag furrowed their eyebrows and looked at Ann quizzically. 

 

“Eggnog and whiskey. I swear that’s all it is.” Ann made a gagged motion and and put the cup down.

 

“Yeah well it tastes like shit, you sure it’s not poison?” Mag raised their eyebrows as a realization hit them.

 

“Ann… have you never drank eggnog?” Ann looked at his shoes and fiddled with his sleeves. 

 

“...no. Never really had the opportunity. I guess this just means I don’t like eggnog.” Mag rolled their eyes at him, of course Anxiety had never had eggnog before. 

 

“Yes I suppose it does. How does hot chocolate sound?” Anxiety nodded his head. He was worried Mag would laugh at him, but they just seemed annoyed. Mag snapped their fingers and his glass was replaced by a mug of hot chocolate, overflowing with marshmallows. 

 

“Thanks.” Anxiety sipped on the hot chocolate, still embarrassed but thankful that Mag didn’t mention it further. Instead, they raised their glass with a smirk.

 

“To being the outcasts.” Anxiety felt like a knife was going through his chest with that statement. He knew it was true, he knew he was an outcast. He knew the other sides hated him. He knew his only shot at anything resembling friendship was this weird alliance he had with Mag. He knew he was a villain in this story. But it still hurt like hell to have it pointed out. He never asked to be an outcast. He never wanted to hurt the others. But it wasn't his job to be liked. His job was to protect Thomas. So he plastered on a smile, and raised his glass.

 

“To being outcasts.”


	6. Chapter 6

July 13th, 2015 1:55 AM

“I think that’s enough studying for tonight. We’ll put the spells into practice tomorrow.” Mag said as they stood up from their chair. Ann looked down at the book they had been going over.

 

“But, wait what about the spells on the other side of the book?” Mag glanced at Ann, pausing as if to choose their words carefully.

 

“Those are counterspells, they’re too high level for you right now.” Anxiety looked at Mag curiously.

 

“Well, what do they do?” Mag sighed.

 

“Exactly what they sound like, they counteract other spells. I’ll go over them when we get to them. Don’t worry about them for now.” But of course, he was Anxiety. So worry he did. He went back to his room because Mag would be suspicious if he didn’t, but he continued thinking about the spells. _What if they’re important? What if Mag is lying? What if Mag doesn’t want him to learn the spells so he won’t get more powerful than them? Counterspells seem important to defense. What if Mag turns against him? What if Mag tries to hurt him? What if- what if- what if-_ **_what if I steal the book and study it on my own?_ ** No. No he knew he was being ridiculous. Mag said the spells were too high level, and Anxiety wanted to believe them. He didn’t trust Mag, not really. He didn’t trust anyone. But if he’s learned anything it’s that magic is dangerous. Very dangerous. And one little slip up is all it would take to send him to an early grave. He knew this, and so even if he didn’t trust Mag he was going to try and give them the benefit of the doubt. Because the last thing Anxiety wanted to do was hurt Thomas or the others by messing this up. Of course, he was still anxiety so he remained there pacing in his room for the rest of the night.

* * *

 September 8th, 2015 2:43 AM

“Anxiety are you even listening to me?” Ann jerked up as he heard Mag’s voice echo through the cave. It was another study night and he just couldn’t seem to focus. Mag was now standing in front of the desk while Ann sat on the floor, surrounded by open spell books on three sides. The emo looked up at Mag for the first time in what had to have been an hour, and Mag did not look happy about it.

 

“O-of course I’ve been listening.” He cringed at the stutter in his voice, there was no way Mag was going to believe him. And he was right of course, but instead of yelling like he expected Mag simply sighed.

 

“Look, if you can’t understand what I’m saying just tell me and I’ll speak slower. It doesn’t help either of us if you just nod along and pretend to know what I’m talking about. You wanted to learn the language didn’t you?” The emo nodded, muttering out apologies and assurances in the witch language as a sign that he was indeed paying attention. What Mag didn’t realize was that the reason Ann hadn’t been paying attention was not that he couldn’t understand, it was that he was more interested in the spell books in front of him. Specifically, the counterspells that Mag still refused to teach him. He was only able to see a couple of them, and only by turning to the middle of the book where the pages shifted from the spell section to counterspell section. That way Mag simply thought he was reading the last of the regular spells. He started looking over them at the beginning of Mag’s lecture only to realize that the spells weren’t difficult at all. Mag had been lying.

 

“Hey, are you okay?” This time when Mag addressed him they sounded more concerned than anything else. He didn’t normally act like this. He was normally too anxious and distrustful to even consider letting Mag out of his sight, much less ignore him completely. “No, never mind. I know you’ll just lie and say you’re fine. Go to bed Ann, we can wrap this up now.” Normally Mag would be right. It wouldn’t be the first time that Anxiety got sick and lied about it. But this time he just wanted to get out of there and think things over. He didn’t want to do anything rash. He didn’t want to mess things up. But he was trusting Magnus less and less and now he just didn’t feel safe. So after a quick nod of thanks, he left the cave faster than he ever had before. Leaving behind a concerned and confused dragonwitch in his wake.

 

Only to spend the rest of the night pacing in his room wondering what he should do. And no matter what he did, what he thought, there was always one sentence that came back to his mind. _What if I steal the book?_ He didn’t have a choice at this point. He had to know what Mag was hiding. There were too many risks. _What if Mag intends to trap him? What if everything was a trick? What if they want to kill him? What if- what ifwhatifwhatif-_ He didn’t have a choice. He was already viewed as a villain, so what’s the harm in acting like one? Besides, Mag still hadn’t noticed the book he accidentally took almost a year ago. He would be fine. This could work. All he had to do was wait for a sleep night, sneak in, grab the book, and sneak out. He repeated this in his head until he was sure it would work. _This will work. Everything will be fine._

* * *

September 10th, 2015 3:00 AM

_This isn’t working and nothing is fine._ Getting into Creativity’s room had been fine. He was sneaking in two out of three nights so that part was no problem. As long as he knew where he was going, the door to the room would take him to wherever he wanted to be in the forest. So as usual, he appeared at the very edge of the clearing they used for magic training. It was near enough that he didn’t have far to walk, but far enough away that he could always turn around and back out if he wanted to. The problem was that the first thing he heard when he walked into the clearing was screaming. The sound of an entire village worth of people screaming and running to be exact. He was far enough away that it wasn’t painfully loud or traumatizing, but it was definitely within earshot. He quickly turned and ducked into the trees, hiding briefly while he steadied his breathing. Once he was sure he wasn’t dying, he slowly stood up and glanced around, searching for the source of the alarm. He saw bright green lights peeking through a far off area of the trees. A green light that he immediately recognized as Mag’s magic. The sight, combined with the now faint sound of screaming, reminded him of something Mag had told him. ‘ _Some of it is from a village I destroyed ages ago,’_ apparently The Dragonwitch was destroying another village.

 

For a few moments, Anxiety wasn’t sure what to do. He couldn’t rush in to help, Mag would be furious and there’s a chance Creativity is there too. Which technically meant that this was the perfect time to grab the books. But there were a lot of variables in this situation. _What if Mag came back? What if Creativity came to the cave looking for Mag? What if Mag isn’t even at the village and they’re simply casting spells from their home? What if-_ The screaming was getting closer. Ann quickly pulled himself out of his thoughts as he realized people were fleeing the village. And he had to move. So, with no better ideas, he started running to the cave. He pulled the hood of his jacket up, praying no one saw him. And if they did all they would see is a shadow of a figure.

 

He carefully stepped into the darkness of the cave, almost startled by how calming the familiar blackness had become. He checked behind him to make sure no one had followed him, and once he was sure he was alone Ann walked into the main room of the cave. He walked right past the glittering gold and gemstones, determined to grab something with far more value. He browsed the bookshelves quickly yet curiously. He could only take one, and it had to be a good one. He didn’t know duplication spells, so it had to be one that Mag wouldn’t notice. Once he was sure he had glanced at all of them, he grabbed the one he wanted. It was the book that contained the few combat spells that Mag had taught him. Anxiety figured that if there was any type of spell he would want to fight against it would be one of the violent ones. Once he made sure the missing book wasn’t obvious, he turned to leave but a loud voice at the mouth of the cave made him freeze.

 

“DRAGONWITCH!” He knew that voice. That angry tone that secretly made his blood run cold. That voice he ~~loved~~ feared. The voice of those he was born to protect. The voice of those who hated him. And this was the voice of the one who hated him most of all. His heart rate sped up and for a moment he didn’t know what to do. But it wasn’t long before the voice started shouting again and Anxiety’s fight or flight response kicked in. He ran through the door to Mag’s bedroom, having been invited in before and therefore immune to the enchantments on it. He could still hear Creativity’s yelling through the door and his heart rate was rising high above healthy.

 

“Dragonwitch come out this instant you fiend!” The Prince was beyond furious at this point. His sword was out and he was practically radiating hatred. But he knew the likelihood of the witch being here was slim. They were most likely back at the village, but he had to check. Had to make sure they weren’t just casting spells from the comfort of their lair. He refused to storm into the village only to find that he was helpless to do anything. Creativity couldn’t let that happen. _Not again._ So he rushed forward, moving around the pile of gold and examining the space behind. At first he didn’t even notice the door, it was enchanted so that only those who were extremely observant could see it. And any other day he would’ve missed it. But Creativity was pissed and determined, and no enchantment could have stopped him from charging forward to bang on the door as hard as he could. But the door refused to open.

 

“Come out of here this instant, you villain! I’ll kill you for this!” The Prince continued to bang on the door and scream, while Anxiety sunk to the ground, his back against the door. His heart was too fast, too loud. His breathes were too shallow, too quick, not enough, never enough, not enough air. He clapped his hand over his mouth as he began to shake, the book held tightly to his chest. He knew he was safe, that there was no way Creativity could get through Mag’s enchantment. And even if he could, he wasn’t mad at Anxiety. But all the side of fear could hear was Creativity’s angry voice and sharp knocks, all he could feel was his own shaking, his own fear. _He’s going to kill me he’s going to kill me he’s going to kill me._ And all he could do was wait. So he waited. He waited until the banging stopped. He stayed and waited until the voice faded. He waited until the thoughts went away. He waited until he could breathe again. He waited until his heart beat wasn’t the only thing he could hear. He waited until the tears he hadn’t even realized he was spilling dried on his cheeks. Then he slowly stood up, put his hands on the doorknob, and slowly, _very_ slowly, he opened the door. He made sure no one was there. And then he ran. He ran all the way back to his own room and he didn’t stop until he was safe.

 

Once he knew he was safe, he collapsed onto the floor. He didn’t faint, or fall over. He just sank to his knees and then just curled up into a ball in the middle of the floor, too tired to even move. Too tired to think. He hadn’t even noticed that the book had slipped from his hands the moment he hit the ground. It had been a long, long time since he had an attack that bad, and he didn’t think he would be leaving his room any time soon. Defeated and exhausted, Anxiety just laid there on the floor until he passed out. He was oblivious to the battle that waged on. While Mag was left oblivious to the property that had been stolen. While Creativity was left oblivious to the horrific damage that he had inadvertently caused.


	7. Chapter 7

January 12th, 2016 12:06 AM

It was over a week before Anxiety went back to magic lessons with Mag. And even after he went back, he never told Mag why he disappeared for a week. Mag was suspicious of course, but soon things went back to normal. They went back to training and studying. Christmas passed the same as it had the previous year. Anxiety started teaching himself the counter spells, and so far they weren’t nearly as important or difficult as he had expected. The book he stole was focused on magical combat, which meant the counterspells were more focused on defensive spells and spells that destroyed magic barriers. Which, while very useful, were a bit disappointing compared to the super dangerous, forbidden magic Mag and his own negative overthinking made it out to be. Which means either Mag underestimated Anxiety’s ability, or Anxiety stole the wrong book. 

 

Which is exactly what Anxiety was contemplating as he paced his room that evening. He had to steal another book, possibly more than one, if he wanted to continue learning. But that meant risk. And that meant possibly reliving what happened last time. He wasn’t sure he was ready for that. He knew it was just an unlucky coincidence last time, wrong place wrong time. But that didn’t stop him from imagining every possible worst case scenario.  _ What if- What if- What if- What if this happened? What if that happened? What if Mag caught him? What if Creativity caught him? What if they killed him? What if the Prince killed him? What if Creativity caught him and told Morality? What if-  _ He wasted an hour on the what if questions before he realized what he was doing. He needed to make a decision. Either follow his instincts and crawl back into bed, or shove down his feelings and move forward. He groaned loudly in frustration and the dim lights in his room flickered in response. He didn’t want to choose, not really. But he needed to. He couldn’t keep pacing away the night. Then he realized something. He was already screwed, what was the point in trying to save himself? There was no way out of the deal that wouldn’t put the others in danger. He was in this mess whether he liked it or not, so he might as well make the best of it right? Ann thought he remembered Morality saying something like that at some point. Or maybe it was Logic? He wasn’t sure, but the statement remained. He started this, he was going to finish it. He was going to protect Thomas, even if it kills him. 

* * *

February, 2nd 2016 2:32 AM

Anxiety huffed as he trudged through the forest away from Mag’s cave and closer to the exit. He tried stealing more books three days ago, with mixed success. He got the book, Mag didn’t notice a thing, nothing eventful happened, but the book turned out to be useless. Well, not completely useless, but still a waste of his time. So this time, determined not to waste another evening, Ann stole three books. It was much more nerve wracking than his last two robberies, but he was able to return the last three books he had stolen so that partially made up for it. He continued walking, wanting to be one hundred percent certain that no one was following him. When he figured he was deep enough in the forest to avoid being seen, he summoned the door out of Creativity’s realm. He couldn’t wait to get back to his room. It was late, he was tired, and these books were unreasonably heavy. It was also important for him to finish the books as fast as possible so he could return them as soon as possible. 

* * *

March 1st, 2016 1:23 AM

Anxiety hovered in the darkness of Magnus’s cave. He still hadn’t returned the books and Mag had been acting weird during their last magic training session. He couldn’t help but wonder if tonight was the night he would be killed. If Mag found out they would attack him for theft. But he knew if he stayed there for too long, Mag would find him and ask questions he didn’t want to answer. He took a deep breath and walked into the main area of the cave. 

 

He wasn’t quite sure what he was expecting, but Magnus screaming swear words was not it. For a moment, Anxiety just stood there in shock as Mag’s voice echoed in the cave. Their speech was a mix of English, Witchen, and maybe Latin? He wasn’t quite sure. He stood there in the torch light for a few more moments, not sure what to make of Mag’s outbursts. Eventually he sighed and thought to himself,  _ What am I willing to put up with today?  _ And he was just about to decide the answer when the witch’s voice abruptly stopped. 

 

“Anxiety?! Oh dear, how long have you been standing there?” Ann lifted his head to see that Mag had come around the pile of gold to where he could see them. And boy, Mag was a  _ mess _ . Their normally perfect red hair was all over the place, they had bags under their eyes, the white dress shirt they were wearing had one sleeve rolled up and wasn’t tucked in at all, and the dark purple skirt they were wearing with it seemed oddly out of place compared to their usual attire. And that wasn’t even mentioning the green and black smudges on their arms, hands, and shirt. Anxiety recognized it was magic residue and, possibly soot? 

 

“Uhhh… are you… okay?” Mag shifted their feet, as though they were trying to think of what to say. Ann had never seen Mag like this. They were always so collected, with an air of sophistication and power. A sort of “don’t fuck with me” vibe followed them constantly. So to see the self proclaimed villain of the story so nervous, maybe even embarrassed, left Anxiety somewhat speechless. 

“Oh, ah, yes I’m fine. Just uh, didn’t expect you to actually show up tonight. It’s after midnight and you uh, normally if you don’t show up at midnight you don’t show up at all.” The darker side just kinda stared at Mag for a minute, trying to gauge how genuine Mag’s response was. 

 

“Well here I am, but uh… What exactly are you doing?” Mag sighed and pushed their fingers through their hair, as though that could possibly fix it. 

 

“I’ve been trying to think up a new evil scheme to defeat Creativity but nothing new is coming to me! I’ve already destroyed a couple villages, I’ve tried putting a curse on him, but now that I can’t kill him I’m running out of ways to keep him at bay. Fighting with him isn’t entertaining when I know I can never truly win.” Anxiety raised an eyebrow. All this worrying was because of  _ him?  _ Because of the deal he made? He almost wanted to laugh. But he held in his amusement for now, it wouldn’t be good for him to agitate Mag when they were like this. But what was he supposed to say to that? 

 

“I see… uh, what’s with the clothes?” Mag looked confused for a moment before they looked down at themselves.

 

“Oh, this is what I tend to wear when I’m just relaxing or reading in my room. I was too frustrated to change so I just kinda left it.” Anxiety sighed, he didn’t really know what to think and he really didn’t want to get caught up in Mag and Creativity’s rivalry. The other sides hated him enough, and he knew if Mag asked him to get involved he’d choose the sides. Which would burn the one bridge he’s managed to build in his entire existence. 

 

“Welp, you’re clearly very frustrated and not in the mood for books and studying so I’m just gonna go back to bed.” Anxiety started to turn around but Mag stopped him before he could start walking. 

 

“No, wait there was something I wanted to give you.” Anxiety quickly turned back to Mag, only to see them rush off to the bookshelves. He stood there for a minute, unsure if Mag wanted him to follow or not. Luckily Mag returned before Ann could make a decision. 

 

“Here, since we didn’t get to do any studying.” In Mag’s outstretched hands was a book. It was a dark purple color and lacked any markings. Anxiety cautiously took the book and flipped through it. It was printed in Witchen like the spell books, but it wasn’t nearly as old as them. 

 

“What is it?” Anxiety asked as he closed the book and looked back at Mag.

 

“It’s a fairy tale book.” The dark side stared at them. 

 

“A what?” Mag sighed.

 

“You heard what I said. It’s a book filled with Witchen fairy tales and legends. I figured it would help you practice your reading skills, since we keep missing study nights.” Anxiety’s eyes widened, and now he felt guilty. Well, he felt guilty until he reminded himself that Mag wanted to murder the other sides and was constantly putting Creativity in danger. 

 

“Huh, thanks. I’m gonna go to bed now.” Anxiety internally flinched at how stiff and awkward that sounded. He really hated awkward social situations. Luckily, Mag took his awkwardness in stride.

 

“Alright, good night Ann.” And with that, the two of them turned around and walked away from each other. Both slightly uncomfortable and unsure what to do next. 

 

Anxiety stepped out of the cave and stopped, trying to collect his rampant thoughts. He didn’t even realize how tense the conversation made him until it was over. He couldn’t even figure out what exactly had made him so alarmed. Was it the awkwardness? Was it the guilt from stealing? Was it the frustrating feeling of being given a gift and not having something to give in return? Or was it the angry screaming? … Anxiety decided not to think about it anymore. Instead, he took a deep breath and began his walk back to his room.

* * *

March 1st, 2016 2:12 AM

Logic yawned and stretched as he finished up his work. His back ached from sitting at his desk for so long, but he had to get this done. Thomas needed a schedule for tomorrow, and it was Logic’s job to write it. He glanced at his watch and almost jumped up in alarm. He didn’t realize it had gotten so late. He sighed and slowly stood up, running a hand through his no doubt messy hair. He took off his tie and hung it up before collapsing onto his bed. Only to realize that his stomach was growling. It was then that he remembered he started working around 4 PM, and didn’t stop until now, meaning he skipped diner. Now, normally the sides don’t technically have to eat, at least not at the rate that humans do, but Logic was tired and he liked the normalcy of eating like a human. It helped distract him from how unrealistic his entire existence was. So he groaned and slowly stood back up, then headed to his bedroom door. Logic stepped out of his room and began walking down the hallway, too tired to care if anyone saw his messy appearance. He rubbed his eyes and looked up, only to freeze at what he saw. For a moment he wondered if he was dreaming, but he rubbed his eyes again and the figure was still there, closing the door to Roman’s room.    
  
“Anxiety?” The figure jumped what had to be a whole foot into the air before quickly turning to face Logic. The emo looked at Logic with wide, terrified eyes, his whole body tense. 

 

“Lo-Logic. What are-uh-what are you doing up?” The intelligent side raised an eyebrow at the stutter, but decided not to comment on it. 

 

“I was up late working and forgot to eat, so I’m going to get some food. What were you doing in Creativity’s room?” Anxiety quickly looked to the ground and moved his hands behind his back. “Anxiety… what are you hiding?” It was common knowledge that while Anxiety has harsh to everyone, him and Creativity bickered the most. Whenever something went wrong, the Prince almost always put the blame on the darker trait, including when his stuff mysteriously went missing. Logic had heard his accusations of theft many times before but never really believed him. But now…

 

“Anxiety if you do not show me what you are hiding I’ll just have to go and get Creativity-”

 

“No!” Anxiety rushed forward a few steps as his wide, terrified eyes flew to the Logical side’s face. Logic was so startled that he actually took a few steps back, but then as he took a closer look at Anxiety he noticed that the emo’s hands had moved forward as if to stop him, revealing the dark purple book in his hands. 

 

“Anxiety… where did you get that book?” Anxiety looked to his hands as if he just realized what he had done. He quickly held the book to his chest, as though he believed Logic would take it from him. 

 

“I... “ Anxiety sighed and looked to the ground in shame. Or maybe he was simply trying to think up an excuse, emotions weren’t Logic’s area. “I was just gonna borrow it.” 

 

“In the middle of the night, when no one would catch you? Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t force you to return it right now. I don’t particularly care what sort of petty, nonsensical rivalries you and Creativity have, but if Morality finds out you’ve been stealing he’ll throw a fit, and that’s an inconvenience no one wants to deal with.” It was Logic’s job to keep things in some sort of order, lest the emotional sides turn everything to chaos. He couldn’t afford to have Anxiety stirring up trouble. 

 

“Well… It-it’s just that…” Anxiety seemed to be struggling to say anything, which was rather unusual. The negative side usually possessed a sharp tongue that could silence or shoot down any side’s ideas in an instant. But Logic was tired and hungry and simply did not possess the stamina or patience to wait for him to collect himself. 

 

“Go on.” Anxiety squeezed his eyes just like he was bracing for something, then his words came spilling out at a rapid pace, while still being quiet enough to not wake anyone. 

 

“I wanted to read but my room can’t conjure books okay?” Now that got the Logical side’s attention. 

 

“What?” Anxiety shuffled his feet, still holding the book tightly to his chest.  He was scowling now, like he wanted to be anywhere else but there. 

 

“I… can’t conjure books. Creativity’s room is big and easy to sneak in to undetected, so I wanted to see if he had anything. He doesn’t, not really, just a few fairy tale books. But it’s all I could find so…” Anxiety continued to scowl at the ground, but even Logic could tell he was uncomfortable. But Logic was bewildered. Anxiety actually wanted to read? And learn? Did this mean…

 

“Wait, so you’re saying you’ve never read a book before?” Anxiety tensed up, pausing as if deciding how to respond. Then he nodded. Well, this was just inexcusable. Logic was learning, he was the teacher, and there was no way he was going to let a possible student suffer bookless. 

 

“Well, I guess we’re going to have to fix that.” Logic smiled as Anxiety looked at him in surprise. “I don’t know why you didn’t just come and ask me, I have plenty of books you can borrow. Follow me.” Logic turned and began heading back to his room, only to pause as he noticed Anxiety wasn’t following him. 

 

“Wait… really?” Logic sighed, but he supposed it made sense that Anxiety was suspicious. 

 

“Of course, I’m more than happy to lend you something.” Anxiety seemed to be stunned into silence after that as he finally followed Logic into his room. 

 

Logic’s room had deep blue walls that were only really visible near the ceiling because the rest of it was covered in bookshelves. He had a bed and a desk pushed against one of the walls, which had a few science and space posters on it. The rest of the walls were just lined with books. Logic walked directly over to the right wall of books as Anxiety cautiously stepped inside, gazing at everything with wide, curious eyes. None of the other sides had ever been inside Logic’s room, there just wasn’t a need. Logic picked a couple of his favorite, yet simple, fiction books off one of the shelves before turning to look back at the darker side. For a moment, Logic just looked at him. He realized with a start that he had never seen the problematic side look like this. The dark shadow was always bold, sinister, and full of sarcasm. Always snarky and rude. Always pointing out the negatives. Always fitting into the villainous role Creativity often put him into. But now? Now Anxiety seemed hesitant. Curious. Attentive. His eyes flickered between places, like he was trying to see everything at once. Logic stored away this new discovery to be pondered later, memorizing the way Anxiety looked. He then stepped forward, clearing his throat. 

 

“These should be a good starting point. They are interesting yet simple enough to follow as someone who doesn’t read very often. I assume you can read, since we all possess Thomas’s memories?” Anxiety nodded. Logic didn’t comment on the fact that Anxiety had flinched when Logic began speaking. But he did notice. He held out the two books. 

 

“So,” Anxiety cleared his throat before continuing, “I-I can really borrow these?”  Anxiety eyes kept darting from the books to Logic’s eyes. 

 

“Yes, I did say you could didn’t I?” Anxiety gulped. 

 

“And you aren’t gonna tell the others?” The teacher was a little hesitant, but he figured Anxiety was struggling to follow him this far. 

 

“I won’t say a word.” Slowly, Anxiety took the books and they joined the purple one where it was pressed against his chest. 

 

“T-thanks,” it was mumbled to the point that Logic barely heard it, but he was grateful nonetheless. He smiled. 

 

“It is my pleasure. But if you’ll excuse me, I really need to eat something.” Anxiety quickly began backing out of the room. 

 

“Oh, right sorry. I’ll uh, I’ll just go to bed.” Logic was barely able to wish him a goodnight before he disappeared around the corner.


	8. Chapter 8

March 1st, 2016 2:42 AM

Anxiety closed the door to his bedroom behind him and pressed his back against the familiar wood. He stood there, frozen, for exactly 60 seconds, holding his breath, waiting for Logic to follow or call after him or hear his heart pounding. As soon as those 60 seconds were over, he was gone. The anxiety attack had been building in his chest from the moment Logic called him and now it hit him full force. Maybe it had been building for longer, he wasn’t sure anymore. All he knew was that his heart was beating too fast and his breath was short little gasps and _oh god he was dying what had he done what had he done oh god oh-_ He lied. Right to Logic’s face and all Logic did in response was shower him in kindness he didn’t deserve. He was a thief and a liar and the two people he lied to and stole from were giving him gifts and _oh god he can’t breathe._

 

Anxiety slowly sank to his knees. He barely registered that he had tossed the books to the floor beside him. He didn’t even notice that he was sobbing at this point. He didn’t notice he was barely breathing. He didn’t notice that the few dim lights he had in his room were violently flickering shades of purple and white. He didn’t notice the shadows curling around him, clawing at his brain. He didn’t notice he was shaking. He didn’t notice how tightly his hands were gripping his scalp. He didn’t notice his door lock on it’s own. He didn’t notice the sparks coming off his body.

 

He didn’t notice any of that, all he could think was _dead so dead so very very dead what had he done? Liar thief traitor. They’ll hate him they’ll kill him they’ll hurt him what had he done he was so dead oh god what if they find out they were nice they were kind too kind too nice they won’t be nice when they find out they didn’t deserve that they didn’t deserve his lies Logic deserves better but what if Logic had found out everything could have been ruined Logic would hate him Logic would tell the others Logic would hurt him Creativity would hurt him Creativity would kill him Creativity would scream at him and kill him and run his sword through his chest through his skull and there’d be blood and Mag would kill them the deal wouldn’t be fulfilled they’d be dead they’d be dead and it’d be all his fault it’s all his fault all his fault_ **_dead_ ** _his fault all his fault_ **_liar_ ** _they’d hate him_ **_Thief_ ** _what had he done they’ll_ **_kill_ ** _him he’s_ **_dead_ ** _it’s his fault_ **_it’s all his fault it’s all his fault IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT_ **

 

He violently gasped, trying, fighting, begging to be able to breathe. It felt like the room was crushing him and none of his usual techniques were working. _Liar_ . He needed to focus but the guilt was crushing him. _Thief._ He felt like he was being suffocated. _Dead._ He needed to **focus** . He isn’t dead. _It’s all your fault._ He felt like the shadows were consuming his mind. He needed to **fight it.** _Liar._ He slowly became aware of the pain in his scalp. _Thief._ He became aware of his hands in his hair. _They hate you._ He slowly pulled his hands out of his hair and they came back sticky and **red.** _Your fault._ He stared at his hands- at the red- he needed to **focus.** _They’ll kill you._ He became aware of the fact that he was still hyperventilating. He became aware of the wetness dripping down his face. Was it tears or was it blood? _Hate you._ He took one hand and started tapping on his opposite arm. **1-2-3-** _Kill you._ He needed to **focus** . **1-2-3-4-5-** _You’re dead._ He needed to wake up. **1-2-3-4-5-6-** _IT’S YOUR FAULT._ He needed to

**_Breathe_** **.**

**In-2-3-4** _You know they hate you._ **Hold-2-3-4-5-6-7** _You’ve known from the start that you won’t make it out of this alive._ **Out-2-3-4-5-6-7-8** _You know it’s your fault._ **In-2-3-4** _But that’s okay._ **Hold-2-3-4-5-6-7** _Because you’re their scapegoat._ **Out-2-3-4-5-6-7-8** _You’re Anxiety._ In two three four. _And you don’t matter._ Hold two three four five six seven. _It’s your job to be horrible and wrong._ Out two three four five six seven eight. _So they don’t have to be._ Breathe in. _You play the villain._ Hold. _Because someone has to._ Breathe out. He is Anxiety. It is his job to protect Thomas no matter what. That is his purpose. His purpose is not to be smart. His purpose is not to be morally right. His purpose is not to be imaginative. His purpose is to protect, by any means necessary. _Even if he breaks the rules._ Breathe in. _Even if everyone hates him._ Hold. _Even if it kills him._ Breathe out.

 

Eventually, Anxiety managed to pull himself out of his head. He will be forever grateful that Thomas has a friend with anxiety. A friend who was kind enough to tell Thomas about a very useful grounding technique. He looked at his hands and finally processed the fact that he had blood on them. Which almost sent him spiraling again before he realized he had hurt himself. He looked around the room and noticed that some of his light were burned out. In fact, they almost looked like they exploded. And that will be something he will have to deal with eventually, but right now all he wants to do is sleep.

 

He shakily stood up, his legs hurting and his head pounding. He stumbled his way into his bathroom, not even bothering to glance in the mirror. He pulled off his clothes and got into the shower. The familiar warmth of the water helped to calm his mind, even as he watched the blood wash from his hair down into the drain. After he stood there for who knows how long, he got out and threw on a fresh pair of boxers and his softest pajama pants. He had barely pulled them all the way up before he collapsed into his bed. His warm, familiar bed filled with the softest blankets and pillows and plushies. And for the first time in a very, very long time, he fell asleep instantly.

* * *

April 24th, 2016 11:24 PM

Anxiety was lying lazily on his couch in his outer room, trying to focus on his spell books and failing miserably. All of the sides’ rooms had two sections. The inner room and the outer room. The outer room is what any of the other sides saw if they tried to walk into another Side’s room. For Creativity it was his realm. For Anxiety it was a creepy version of Thomas’s living room. Anxiety liked familiarity, Creativity liked adventure. So their outer rooms reflected places they enjoyed being, and wouldn’t mind others seeing. The inner room is more like a bedroom. Only the side who owns it can get into it, unless that side invites someone else in. Even then, the owner of the room must be present for anyone else to stay inside. And Anxiety couldn’t get Logic’s room out of his head. Because Logic hadn’t taken Anxiety to his outer room. Logic took Anxiety to his bedroom. His inner room. And Anxiety just couldn’t fathom why. Maybe it was just because that’s where the particular book he wanted was located? Maybe it was because Logic wasn’t emotional and therefore didn’t care or understand the significance of his actions? Maybe it was because the Logical side was too tired to care? Anxiety would never know. He was probably just overthinking it. Like always.

 

Anxiety threw the book on the floor in frustration, his lights once again flickering in response and the music blasting from his headphones stalled a moment. He noticed not long after his big panic attack awhile ago that whenever he got overly emotional any electronics would flicker or intensify in response. He was lucky he didn’t have a TV in his bedroom or it probably would’ve exploded along with his lights. Ever since then he’s been trying to get a better grip on his emotions, and his powers. Study nights with Mag had kind of become optional by this point. Sometimes he’d show up, sometimes he wouldn’t. But magic training nights were mandatory. Even if sometimes it got delayed a few days, it always happened. He had once again switched out the books he was borrowing. He’s pretty sure Mag knows, but they won’t say anything about it.

 

Anxiety looked over to the coffee table next to the couch. Sitting there were the two books Logic had lent him. He had actually finished one of them and he was half way through the second. While the whole wanting to read thing had been a giant lie, Anxiety’s guilt wouldn’t let him return the books without reading them. Or maybe it was the fear that Logic would ask him about the books and Anxiety wouldn’t know how to answer if he didn’t actually read. Either way, Anxiety was reading them. And he figured since he couldn’t focus on spells, he might as well read something more interesting. It was a mystery book, nothing super graphic or intense, but it was interesting. And Anxiety found himself enjoying it more than he expected. The book, combined with the music filling his ears, was a welcome distraction from reality, and before the emo trait realized it it was five in the morning and he had fallen asleep on his couch.

* * *

April 27th, 2016 10:54 PM

Anxiety stood in his room, staring at the door to the hallway. This isn’t a particularly new habit, he’d memorized all the curves and colors of the door years ago. From the outside, his door was jet black and looked plain yet sinister at the same time. But on the inside, it had intricate carvings that shifted from black to purple that changed and became more or less visible in certain light levels. His eyes chased the reflective, almost glowing, purple streaks that he knew like the back of his hand, despite the fact that they change constantly. He took a deep breath, fighting to summon the strength he needed to move forward. He finished both of the books Logic had given him, which means now he is obligated to return them. Despite how much he didn’t want to. He didn’t like confrontation. He didn’t want to have to discuss what happened. He didn’t like embarrassment. He didn’t want to relive the stress or the guilt of that night. And, although he would never admit it, he really liked the books and almost wanted to keep them. But they weren’t his, and he needed to return them.

 

Anxiety sighed, he needed to do this. He hesitantly stepped forward, the two books held against his chest in a death grip. The door was slowly pulled open, and once he glanced around and knew that no one was nearby, he stepped into the hall. His feet moved lightly yet quickly, going straight to Logic’s door. He pulled his hand up to knock but froze before he could. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t just walk up and _talk_ to Logic. There were too many ways this could go wrong. To many _what ifs_ running through his mind. He could embarrass himself. He could offend Logic. He could accidentally reveal the truth. So he decided that talking to the teaching side was out of the question, but he needed to move before anyone saw him. Luckily, split second decisions were his specialty. Within seconds he had placed the books on the ground in front of the dark blue door, knocked, and ran off to his room before anyone could notice. And once again he was standing in his room, staring at the door. Only this time all he could hear was the sound of his own heartbeat.

 

Anxiety was certain that once he returned the books, that would be the end of it. Logic would be pleased to have them back and everyone would go back to ignoring Anxiety’s existence for as long as they could. Except, twenty four hours later Anxiety heard a knock on his door. It took him several moments of staring and listening to his heartbeat to move. When he did finally open his door, he was confused to see no one there. Confused, until he looked down and saw two brand new books at his feet. He felt his face heat up and he once again scanned the corridor for any signs of life. Then, with a small, hesitant half smile he picked up the books and walked back into his room. So maybe it started as a lie. Maybe he could make it into a truth.


	9. Chapter 9

June 24th, 2016 3:32 PM

Anxiety was crouched carefully at the top of the stairs, listening to the conversation below. Creativity had apparently called the other two sides for a meeting about a new idea he had, and while Anxiety wasn’t invited there was no way he was going to let Creativity run wild. 

 

“Okay kiddo, we’re all here. What did you wanna talk to us about?” Morality asked. Anxiety couldn’t see them but he knew they all were gathered in the living room, most likely on the couch based on how far away they sounded. 

 

“I am delighted you asked padre! I have a new idea for a YouTube video, possibly a series, that you all will find simply divine,” Creativity said it in his usual loud, confident voice. Anxiety could practically see the Prince’s arms moving and his face glowing with excitement as he spoke. Anxiety smirked, if he didn’t know how terrifying the Prince could be he would almost consider his excitement adorable. The prince always sounded like a child at Christmas when he found an idea he was passionate about. It was too bad that most of them were far too dangerous to follow up on, Anxiety was already bracing for the furious look Creativity was going to give him later. 

 

“Well Creativity, tell us what it is. I must admit I am very curious as to what you have in mind, Thomas has been slacking when it comes to YouTube and this new idea could be a wonderful opportunity,” Logic said. Anxiety frowned, it was always difficult to get rid of a dangerous idea if Logic agreed with it. He hoped this was going to be one of Creativity’s more reasonable ones or this was going to be a very long day. 

 

“Okay, okay, you ready to hear what fabulous idea I’ve come up with this time,” Creativity continued, Anxiety knew he had to be bouncing on the balls of his feet. Creativity chuckled to himself as he continued. “I mean, it’s actually kind of obvious I don’t know why I haven’t thought of it before.” 

 

“Roman quit stalling and just tell us already.” Anxiety tensed, it was rare that any of them referred to each other by name. Or maybe it wasn’t? He listened in when he could but it occurred to him then that since he didn’t interact with them as much it was possible the others had habits he didn’t know about. Anxiety crept down a couple stairs so he could see into the living room, but was careful not to be spotted. He could now see that Logic and Morality were sitting on the couch, while Creativity stood in front of the coffee table facing them. 

 

“Alright, Alright fine. The amazing, grandiose, idea that I have for the new video is…”  Anxiety held his breath. “...US!” Creativity had his hands out and up in an expectant pose, like he had just delivered an award winning line and was waiting for the applause. But Logic and Morality simply stared then glanced at each other in confusion before looking back at the Prince. 

 

“Um… what do you mean us kiddo?” Prince sighed and put his arms down in annoyance. 

 

“I mean, the video is  _ us _ ! Introducing us as parts of Thomas and explaining who we are, what we do, it’ll be brilliant the fans will love it!” Anxiety’s breath hitched. Creativity wanted to do a video on  _ them?  _ Explaining them,  _ exposing them?  _

 

“That’s… not a terrible idea. But Roman, we aren’t real. We can’t actually film ourselves we’re figments of Thomas’s mind. I mean, I’m not even sure he knows we exist.” Thank god for Logic. 

 

“I’m afraid Logan’s right kiddo. While I agree it would be kinda fun to join in on a video, Thomas isn’t really aware we exist. And even if he was, how would we film it?” Logic and Morality shooting down an idea of Creativity’s? Without Anxiety even having to do anything? Anxiety wanted to cry with relief. Until Creativity started shaking his head and continued speaking.

 

“No, no, no, he does know we exist. Or, well not exactly us, not yet. But I can make him think we exist. I’ve been testing it, experimenting. I know I can give him the idea to make a video about us.” The extravagant prince hadn’t lost any of his excitement, and Anxiety realized he had counted his blessings too soon. 

 

“Uh… what do you mean by experimenting kiddo?” Anxiety couldn’t see Creativity’s face but Logic and Morality were both looking at him with a mix of caution and intrigue. 

 

“Okay, you know the characters that Thomas has been adding to his vines? The dad character, the prince, and the teacher? The ones from a couple years ago?”

 

“Yes Roman, we are familiar with your simulacrums of us,” Logic looked slightly annoyed, it was common knowledge in the mindscape that he wasn’t thrilled with Thomas’s portrayal of the teacher. 

 

“Well, after I first made them, I wanted to see if Thomas was aware of our existence. So I gave him ideas for what Patton and I behave like normally and then gave him ideas about Logan that were very different. Unfortunately, it worked perfectly so I gave up thinking he knew we existed. But, then I was thinking about it again recently and I realized that it doesn’t matter if he doesn’t know us now! All I have to do is give him the ideas slowly over time and he’ll make the video, just like he did with the others. We don’t need to be in the videos, Thomas is an actor. All he needs is a script.” Anxiety’s stomach dropped. Morality was smiling now and Logic was trying to look serious and thoughtful but Anxiety could tell he was fighting a smile as well. There was no way Anxiety could talk them down now but he knew he had to.  _ What if the fans hated them? What if they get hurt? What if people start thinking Thomas is crazy? What if Thomas doesn’t portray them correctly and it changes them? Or hurts them? What if-  _ No. They couldn’t get hurt. Thomas couldn’t get hurt. This was something personal. They were the embodiment of Thomas’s personality. This would mean Thomas putting all of himself out there, for everyone to see, for everyone to  _ judge _ . This wouldn’t end well. He knew it wouldn’t. So he might as well end it now. 

 

“Hahahaha, please, you really think that’ll work?” The other sides jumped as Anxiety appeared at the foot of the steps. He had on his signature smirk, and made every effort to make it look effortless. “No one would watch that. They’ll just think Thomas is crazy.” And there was the look Anxiety was bracing himself for. 

 

“Oh be gone you wretched beast. Of course people would watch it, why would it make Thomas seem crazy?!” Morality and Logic glanced at each other with concern, they both knew where this was heading. 

 

“Oh they will will they? What makes you so confident?” Anxiety sneered. Thomas was an actor, and while most would think all of the acting skill went to Creativity it was actually spread out pretty well between the four sides. Creativity was an actor with flair and improv skills. Logic was an actor with precision and a perfect memorization of lines. Morality was an actor with charisma and emotion. But Anxiety? Anxiety was an actor with paranoia and  _ practice _ . An actor who’s played a part for so long it has become a part of him. An actor who knows every inch of their character and is so worried about messing it up, so considerate of all the details, that he never makes a single mistake. “And of course it’s going to make him seem crazy! You’re talking about introducing the world to the voices in his head. The people he talks to when he talks to himself, which I’m pretty sure is a sign of insanity.”

 

“Actually,” Logic said as he stood up cautiously, “talking to oneself is more normal than people think. It is commonly used as a technique to relieve stress, concentrate on things more accurately, and solve problems. It is perfectly healthy, and most people do it. Plus this is going to be a scripted video with what viewers will believe to be fictional characters.” Anxiety felt his chest get tighter. He supposed Logic had a point but  _ what if he’s wrong?  _

 

“Logic’s right Anxiety, there’s nothing wrong with him exploring himself more,” Morality tried to back his fellow sides up as nicely as he could. Anxiety knew he hated conflict, but this had to be done. 

 

“Alright fine, let’s say you’re right, you’re  _ not _ , but let’s say you are. So Thomas won’t be sent to an insane asylum, but who says the fans are actually going to like you? They’ve already seen the prince character, the dad character, the teacher. Introducing you guys under different names will just make Thomas look lazy. They’ll think he’s not creative enough to come up with more original characters so he’s resorted to reusing old plot lines.” 

 

“That’s not true! I could come up with new characters if I wanted to but what’s the point when we have so much potential?! Why do you have to be so difficult?” Now creativity was really pissed, but luckily that was the goal. If Anxiety baited Creativity enough the prince would go make completely original characters just to spite him. 

 

“Well if you’re such a genius why don’t you go make something original, instead of repeating the same routine we’ve been doing for the last two years?” Creativity clenched his fists. 

 

“Because it isn’t the same you short sighted fiend! This is introducing pieces of Thomas’s personality to better explore himself, not stereotypical characters created for a six second laugh. It’s a completely different format and purpose you can’t just dismiss all this hard work!” Anxiety switched out his smirk for an evil grin. 

 

“Hard work?! Oh Princey don’t make me laugh. Admit it, you’re re-purposing old ideas because you’re running out of them.” The prince was grinding his teeth now.

 

“Oh please, you wouldn’t know hard work if it punched you in the face. All you ever do is destroy other people’s hard work, you never contribute anything!” Anxiety rolled his eyes.

 

“Really? That’s the best comeback you got. God, you really are running out of ideas. Just accept the fact that it’s a terrible idea that no one would like or watch. Ever. It’s weird and stupid and if you three didn’t control Thomas’s actions I would’ve said he wouldn’t even like it.” Creativity stepped forward and for a moment Anxiety actually thought the prince was going to punch him.

 

“Shut up! Just shut up! You know nothing. Nothing! You vile, villainous creep! You want original? I’ll show you original! I’ll show you the best damn video you’ve ever seen!” And with that remark, The Prince ran up the stairs and went straight to his room, slamming the door behind him. Logic sighed as he began walking towards the stairs as well.

 

“Well that went about as well as I predicted. The idea really wasn’t that bad Anxiety, there was no need to antagonize him like that,” Logic said as he began walking up the stairs. “Patton, I shall see you later. Roman will no doubt be back within a few hours to complain again.” 

 

“Oh, okay Logan,” Morality responded solemnly. Anxiety couldn’t help the relieved smile that slipped onto his face. A smile that Morality got a slight glimpse of before Anxiety turned toward the stairs as well. Sure, Morality and Creativity were upset with him. Logic was annoyed. The words that Creativity had screamed would probably echo in his dreams for weeks. But Creativity was distracted, and the idea had been forgotten so Anxiety decided that it was worth it. He began walking back to his room, but Morality stopped him.

 

“Um, kiddo are you alright?” Anxiety’s eyes widened and he whipped around in shock. Creativity and Anxiety fought many times, it was in their natures. But Morality and Logic always seemed concerned with Creativity, no one ever asked about  _ him.  _ Why would they, he’s the villain?

 

“Uh, y-yeah. I’m fine why wouldn’t I be?” Anxiety internally winced at the stutter, and he knew by Morality’s face that the other noticed it too. 

 

“Well, it’s just… what Creativity said was really harsh. Now, to clarify what you said was wrong too. It’s a great idea and I’m sure the fans would love it, and nothing good can come of being rude to Creativity, but… it’s not right for Creativity to be so cruel to you just because you got something wrong.” Anxiety froze. He didn’t know what to do, what to say. This had never happened before. Except… wait no now that he thought about it there was a couple times in the past that Morality had caught him on a bad night and been kind. But Morality is always kind so Anxiety assumed it didn’t mean anything, yet here Morality was once again being nice to him when he really didn’t have to be. The thought was nice, but  _ what was he supposed to do? Say thank you? Say something nice back? Brush it off? No not that. Then what? Oh god it’s been silent for too long. What if Morality thinks he hates him? _

 

“Um, thanks. But I’m fine Morality, really. I-it… I’m used to it so it doesn’t really bother me.” That was apparently not the correct response because now Morality just looked sad. 

 

“Kiddo, you shouldn’t be used to people screaming insults at you…” Anxiety really didn’t like the heartbroken tone in Morality’s voice. He had to correct himself, fix this somehow. 

 

“I mean, yeah but it’s Creativity. We both know he doesn’t really mean it, he’s just upset. People do crazy things when they’re upset right? Besides, it’s not like he’s actually going to hurt me.” Morality appeared to believe the words, even if Anxiety himself did not. Creativity was definitely going to kill him eventually, it was simply a fact at this point. Especially considering the deal he made. But Morality didn’t need to worry about that. Morality didn’t need to worry about anything, that’s what Anxiety was for. 

 

“Well alright, as long as you know that and you aren’t bothered by it. This was a busy morning and I’m sure Roman’s going to be in a bad mood later, so I’m gonna go make some cookies. Wanna join me?” Anxiety hesitated. A part of him wanted to say yes, maybe it would be like last time. But he knew it was too risky, and at the end of the day he didn’t deserve it. Plus, he needed to keep up his tough guy act so the others would listen to him. 

 

“Nah, I think I’m gonna head upstairs as well. Mentally prepare myself for the next time Princey decides to do something stupid.” Morality flinched and for a second Anxiety almost felt guilty for his harsh tone. But the fatherly trait quickly put on a gentle smile. 

 

“Alright kiddo, if that’s what you want. Feel free to come down later and get a cookie.” And with that last remark Morality disappeared into the kitchen and Anxiety went to his room.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are halfway through the pre-written chapters I have piled up. And I realize I already put up a chapter today, but I couldn't wait to release this one so I decided to go ahead and release two. Enjoy, Lovelies!

September 14th, 2016 12:23 AM

“You’re going to have to try harder than that, Stormy!” Anxiety grit his teeth as Mag called to him from across the field. Their training session for that evening had turned into more of a sparring match between Ann and Mag’s illusion. The phantom Magnus lunged forward, their sword just barely missing Anxiety’s cheek. The dark side tightened his grip on the dagger in his hand and suddenly a shower of deep purple and white hot electricity shot out of it as he plunged it into the chest of the illusion. 

 

“I told you, don’t call me Stormy!” Mag simply chuckled as they summoned a new avatar behind their student. The hair on the back of Anxiety’s neck stood and he whipped around, viciously slashing at the illusion and missing them by a hair. The illusion that had been standing just out of reach now took the opportunity to surge forward with their sword, and Anxiety side stepped in response. The fight continued in a tense back and forth until eventually Anxiety managed to get close enough to slash the illusion’s neck. It vanished as it died, and Mag began to walk towards Ann, slow clapping as they went.

 

“Well done! Your skills are advancing nicely, though I do recommend keeping a tighter hold of those sparks.” Anxiety looked at the ground and noticed that some of the grass was now singed slightly. 

 

“Oh. Whoops.” Mag just laughed. 

 

“Don’t worry you’ll get the hang of it one day, and it’s understandable that your magic is harder to control. It’s a very adrenaline and fear based magic class, known for its natural destructive instincts. Which makes a lot of sense given your title and job description.” Anxiety rolled his eyes.

 

“Yeah, yeah so you’ve told me. Hate to break it to ya Mag but it doesn’t really matter why it’s out of control, what matters is that it could hurt the others if I don’t get this right.” Anxiety froze up and looked at the grass.  _ The grass he killed because he can’t do something as simple as-  _ He hated letting his fears slip in front of Mag, especially considering they were currently the biggest threat to his fellow sides. 

 

“Speaking of the other sides, how did the tour go? I only ever get updates from the Prince, and it’s only in the form of him bragging about his latest achievements as he tries to cut me in half. Not the most reliable source of information.” Anxiety couldn’t help but let out a short laugh at that. Dramatically screaming out achievements in the middle of a sword fight definitely sounded like Creativity. 

“The tour went alright I suppose. I have my complaints of course, and I wasn’t thrilled with the idea. I mean, doing a show that is live and unedited? For people that are probably used to short scripted stuff that was edited as well as possible before posting? Not a smart or safe plan  _ at all _ . But he didn’t like  _ die _ or anything, and the fans seemed to enjoy it so at the end of the day I suppose it counts as a win. I was actually pretty surprised when Creativity revealed it all to us.” Mag raised an eyebrow.

 

“Oh? He is impulsive, egotistical, and an overachiever by every definition. Plus he loves theater, why would this show be surprising?” Anxiety couldn’t help the smirk that slipped onto his face. Even he didn’t know why it was there. He started walking back towards the cave and Mag fell into step next to him.

 

“Because he revealed it right after I taunted him into coming up with some original characters. I didn’t realize that he’d actually been planning this for ages, and that the idea had already been sent to Thomas’s consciousness.”

 

“Wait, why did you taunt him into coming up with original characters?” He grimaced.

 

“Because the idea he was wanting to follow up on was far too dangerous for me to allow. I needed to distract him, and what better way than to challenge him.” Mag gave a hum of agreement. Anxiety hesitated for a moment, unsure if he should continue his thought. But he figured if anyone would understand his concern, it would be Mag. Even if they are dangerous. 

 

“I am a little worried though,” The darker trait said. Mag grinned at him.

 

“Aren’t you always?” 

 

“Ha, ha real funny.” Anxiety elbowed them as he said this, but Mag just continued to grin.

 

“Okay, okay, serious answer now, what’s bothering you this time?”

 

“I’m worried about what he’s going to come up with next.” Anxiety had hunched in a little on himself at this point, but he glanced over as Mag hummed in thought, placing their arms behind their head and looking up at the trees. 

 

“Well, it’s like I said earlier. He’s impulsive, always has been, but that doesn’t mean he’s completely unpredictable.” 

 

“Yeah, that’s what I’m afraid of… I’m afraid I know what he’s going to do next.” 

 

“Well… then all we can do now is wait to see if you’re right. If you are, we’ll deal with it. If not, then we’ll just have another mess to clean up.” 

 

“Yeah I suppose you’re right.” Anxiety sighed and looked up. The two witches fell into silence, the only sound being the crackling under their feet. They watched as the leaves fell from the trees. Fall was coming quickly, trees changing to gorgeous warm colors like reds and oranges and yellows. Colors that were both dimmed by darkness and framed by moonlight. It was still warm in the daytime but the cool evening breeze carried the promise of colder weather. And peeking through the trees were twinkling stars. He couldn’t spot any of the usual September constellations, and found amusement in the mental image of Logic yelling at Creativity for his inaccuracy. Yes, Fall was coming quickly, quicker than Anxiety would like. He only had a couple more falls left, and he really didn’t know what to do about it. The contemplative silence lasted all the way back to the cave. A silence that Anxiety normally appreciated, but this was different. There was a strange sort of tension in the air. Like both individuals were contemplating the same thing, and wondered if the other knew it. Or maybe Anxiety was just overthinking again. Maybe Mag just enjoyed the fall. Or maybe he was right. Maybe there was something in the air. It’s not like he’d ever know. 

* * *

 

“Oh yeah, I never did ask cause I wasn’t sure how you’d react, but it’s been bugging me to the point of insanity.” So much for silence. Anxiety looked to Mag.

 

“Ask what?” 

 

“Why the fuck do you carry a dagger everywhere?”

 

“I gotta be prepared for anything.”

 

“Yeah, but like, it makes sense for Princey and me to be armed, we’re constantly fighting. What one earth do you have to fight? And don’t say you got it for training purposes, I remember the second night we met.” 

 

“Well, I am Thomas’s fight or flight reflexes, it only makes sense I’d know how to get my hands dirty.”

 

“What do you mean get your hands dirty? And why do you have that look on your face?”

 

“What look?”

 

“That smug look that makes me think you either just confessed to murder or are about to commit one.”

 

“Ann? Ann don’t just smile and walk away from me- Ann come on why do you have the dagger? Ann?!”

 

* * *

October 17th, 2016 2:34 PM

Maybe if he’d tried harder it wouldn’t have happened. Maybe if he’d been scarier. Maybe if he’d been more forceful. Maybe if he’d better explained to them how dangerous this idea really was. Maybe if he’d been more intimidating. Maybe if he had…  _ Maybe if they’d trusted him…  _ But he didn’t. He didn’t stop them. They didn’t trust him. And they did it anyway. But Anxiety wasn’t going down without a fight. He had a job to do. And if he couldn’t stop Creativity from making this  _ stupid ~~terrifying~~   _ video, he’d at least make sure that it was the best god damn video Thomas had ever made.  

 

“Anxiety would you just shut. Up,” Creativity said. Some small part of Anxiety knew he was being unreasonable but he continued anyway.

 

“No, Princey I will not shut up. Because  _ someone _ had a horrible idea and now I have to stick around and make sure Thomas doesn’t mess everything up, which knowing his level of performance, is a very hard thing to do.” Anxiety sent a glare at Creativity has he continued to watch and listen as Thomas worked on editing the video. Thanks to him, it had taken Thomas all month to get through the preparation and filming of the video and now it was almost finished. He was almost overwhelmed with his namesake, and struggled against the urge to send Thomas into a panic attack. He carefully funneled anxious emotions into Thomas, increasing the dosage every time Thomas made a mistake. He had to make this perfect. He had to get this right.

 

“Anxiety, there is no reason to react this harshly. Your responses are illogical, you are not in the video, you have nothing to do with the video. We all like the video and have consented to the idea. And even though I don’t particularly enjoy partaking in the practice of make believe, I and knowledgeable enough in the subject to say that Thomas has done well.” But Logic doesn’t get it, doesn’t get why this is so bad. This is exposing them, revealing them, to the world, to Thomas, to the fans, to everyone and anyone. They have no idea how the audience will react. There are so many ways this could go wrong. 

 

“I’m afraid the others are right kiddo. While I understand that you’re uncomfortable with this, you aren’t really in the video and it isn’t right to let your opinion of it ruin the other’s fun. Plus, Thomas enjoyed making it and isn’t that what’s most important?” Anxiety sighed. He really hated being mean to Morality, but he didn’t have a choice. If the sides wanted to throw themselves into danger, fine. There wasn’t anything he could do to stop or control them. But he could control Thomas, not a lot but enough. Enough to make this video perfect. Or as perfect as he could get it. So the four sides watched and focused and cheered and directed as Thomas edited the video for the next two days. And then they uploaded it. And then they waited. 

* * *

October 21st, 2016 2:06 PM

Thomas walked into the kitchen, humming as he went. He wasn’t really sure what he was humming, just a tune he came up with he supposed. He started pulling out what he would need to make himself some lunch, nothing too elaborate just a simple sandwich, when his humming increased. He smiled as he realized the song stuck in his head was a familiar Disney tune.  _ Maybe I should make a Disney based video soon.  _ He smiled to himself as the thought crossed his mind. 

 

“Creativity must be in a good mood today.” He said it causally to himself, a joke aimed at the new video he had made. A fond side comment said with a hint of amusement, the fans really liked the series and he wondered what he should do next. “Maybe I’ll ask him if he has any ideas.” He laughed this time. A joke. That was all the sentence was. Until suddenly it wasn’t.

 

“Greetings, wonderful citizens!” Thomas jumped, and the plate he had been holding shattered on the floor. And suddenly two men, who looked exactly alike were staring at each other with wide eyes, their jaws slightly slack, unsure of what to do or how to react.  

 

“Well. Well that’s- uh. Th-that’s.” Creativity cleared his throat and tried again.

 

“Well this is new.” 


	11. Chapter 11

October 21st, 2016 2:14 PM

Anxiety was sprinting through Creativity’s realm. Sprinting faster than he had in ages. His breathing was heavy and his blood was pumping but he didn’t care, he barely even registered it. And he definitely didn’t register the sparks coming off of his arms and legs as he ran. Because he saw it. He felt it when Thomas’s adrenaline spiked. He felt the shock when Thomas saw it, _saw_ _him._ And Anxiety was running because Creativity was _out._ He was out there, in the real world _existing_. And that was wrong wrong wrong wrong _wrong_ because they don’t exist. They’re pieces of Thomas’s mind, they aren’t meant to be in his world so why? Why was creativity out there? When Anxiety first saw it, staring through Thomas’s eyes, all he could do was watch. Then Creativity broke the silence, and Anxiety took off running. Running to the only person who might, _might,_ bring him some answers.

 

“Mag! Magnus get up! Get up something’s wrong, get up get up get up!” Anxiety ran straight through the cave, right up to the door to Mag’s room. He knew Mag wouldn’t be awake, it was only 2 and they had been up until nearly 6 AM. Which means Mag probably didn’t get to sleep until 8 or 9. They were practically nocturnal at this point.

 

“Ugh, alright, alright Ann. I’m up what’s wrong?” Mag stepped out and rubbed their eyes, clearly just in whatever button up and pants they managed to grab first. They came out hesitantly but as soon as they saw Anxiety’s face, saw the electricity in his eyes and his fingertips they knew it was bad. “Anxiety what is it? What happened?”

 

“I-it’s Creativity he’s,” God what was supposed to _say?_ That Creativity was real now? That he was in the real world? That Thomas could _see_ him? “He’s with Thomas. Outside.” Mag stiffened and their eyes widened.

 

“O-outside as in, Thomas is in the mindscape and they’re both outside the cave waiting to kill me or outside as in…?” Anxiety shook his head. Mag just gulped, then slowly began to nod their head. “Right. Okay so. Outside as in… outside Thomas.” Anxiety nodded, alarm and adrenaline radiating from him and for a second Mag thought the simple movement would be enough to send his magic radiating outward.

 

“I-I don’t know what happened! One minute everything was fine and then the next Creativity is just standing there in Thomas’s kitchen, and-” He was cut off by the feeling of Mag’s hands around both of his wrists. He hadn’t even realized he had began to wave his arms around until Mag caught them. Mag tightened their grip on his wrists and pulled him forward, looking Anxiety straight in the eyes.

 

“Look, I don’t know what’s going on and I don’t know how to fix it. But if we work together, we can find out. But not like this, not with your magic behaving like this. You can’t be useful if you’re destroying everything around you.” Anxiety felt like he’d been punched in the gut. And while that feeling was painful, it also grounded him. He needed to focus. If he got swept up in the what ifs he’d cause more damage than good and then he’d be useless. And if he was useless then… “Anxiety, look at me. You have to breathe. You have to calm down. If you don’t there will be consequences, consequences that we’ve avoided so far don’t break that streak now.” Anxiety nodded. Mag was right, he needed to focus. Creativity was in danger, he couldn’t afford to get lost in his head.

 

“How do we start?”

 

* * *

 

October 21st, 2016 2:16 PM

Thomas sat at his kitchen table, in the strangest position of his life. Sitting across the table from him, was himself. Or at least a part of himself. Or maybe Creativity was just a manifestation of a character he had created. _Wait or does that imply creativity created himself?_

 

“Um, so.” Creativity’s voice, _Thomas’s voice_ but not Thomas’s voice at the same time, broke the silence and snapped Thomas out of his thoughts. “I think we’re both a bit confused here.”

 

“Uh, yeah. Yeah I’d say that’s accurate. Am I- Am I dreaming?”

 

“No.” Thomas was briefly taken aback by how quickly the prince answered. The prince noticed and had the decency to look embarrassed. “Sorry, I just mean. Dreams are my specialty, I know when you’re- I’m- _we’re_ dreaming. Does that make sense?”

 

“Y-yeah, no it. It makes sense.”

 

“Good. good…” Another silence filled the air. Thomas didn’t really know what to say or how to act. This character, this _side_ was sitting right in front of him. How was he supposed to respond to that. Luckily, Creativity can only take awkward silences and somber thoughts for so long. And suddenly the spontaneous, extravagant side did something Thomas didn’t expect. He laughed.

 

“Oh god, look at us. It’s like we were both pushed on stage without any lines to read, this is a mess. A mess that certainly isn’t fit for a couple of princes such as ourselves.” Creativity stood up and then bowed gracefully in front of Thomas. “Prince Thomas, it is a pleasure to finally meet you in the flesh. I am Creativity, your extravagant fanciful side at your service. I do not know why I am here, or how I exist but it is a wondrous pleasure regardless.” Thomas didn’t really know how to respond to the dazzling smile or the strong arm holding out a hand to him. Well, he didn’t know how to react at first. Then he noticed something that told him exactly what he was supposed to do. He saw the tell tale signs of a nervous actor putting on a performance. So Thomas did what came naturally, he acted.

 

“Why it is a pleasure to meet you as well, my fellow prince. Let us hope your stay is a pleasant one.” Creativity grinned as Thomas stood and responded with a bow similar to his own, and Thomas knew he made the right choice.

 

“So, while this mystical adventure is still in affect, let’s what else we can do.” Thomas nodded, going along with whatever plan Creativity had because well, what else was he supposed to do. There was still a strong possibility that this was a dream.

 

“What did you have in mind?” Creativity glanced around for a second, holding his chin as if in thought.

 

“Hmm, I’d say first things first would be to test if I’m the only character in this performance,” Creativity said as he walked over to where the TV stood and Thomas just looked at him, fiddling with his hands.

 

“Meaning?”

 

“Try to summon P-Morality and Logic.” Thomas raised an eyebrow. He supposed it wasn’t the strangest request considering the situation, but that seemed like a chaotic mix he wasn’t sure he was prepared for. _Well it’s not like he was particularly prepared for the embodiment of his Creativity to show up in his kitchen either._ So he walked over to the center of the living room, the place where he stood in the video. And he took a deep breath.

 

“Um, Logic? Morality? Can you two come here please?” The two already present held their breaths, and for a moment nothing happened. And for a moment, just a moment, Thomas wondered if he had officially gone insane. But then the moment passed and he was too distracted to think about it.

 

“Hello!”

“You called kiddo?”

 

And for a moment nobody moved. Once again they were faced with a scene that surprised them. Except for Thomas and Creativity the shocking thing this time wasn’t that the others showed up. It was that it felt right. It felt natural, like this was just another day. Like they’d always been there, like this always happened, like this was normal. Except it wasn’t. And as Thomas watched it seemed Logic and Morality were having similar realizations as well.

 

“This… this isn’t… how…” The formal yet relaxed tone in Logic’s voice when he appeared was long gone. Now he looked about as lost as Thomas felt.

 

“Oh… my gosh. Oh my goodness. You-you’re…” Morality stumbled over his words trying to say something. His eyes were wide and he was staring at Thomas. For a moment he feared the shock would be too much, but suddenly the fatherly side’s face shifted into a massive grin. “You’re Thomas! Oh my goodness, hi there kiddo! Oh this is amazing, it’s so good to meet you! Well, I mean, technically I already know you, quite well actually haha.” Morality said it all in a rush and it was hard for Thomas to keep up. His hands were moving all over the place as he talked and Thomas was suddenly struck by how… _right_ it felt. The way Morality smiled, the little wave he did as he said hi, the way he bounced on his heels, the cheerful tone in his voice, it all felt… right.

 

“Morality please try to contain yourself. While I am not completely sure what is happening, or why, I do know that it is paramount that we remain calm and collected. The last thing we want is to overwhelm him.” Morality smiled sheepishly. It appeared Logic had recollected himself after the initial shock and was taking it all in stride. Or at least, that’s how it appeared.

 

“Fear not, my friends, for this is a moment to celebrate!” Creativity’s gestures were just as extravagant as his words.

 

“Celebrate? Why are we celebrating? We aren’t supposed to exist, this is an anomaly. A-an error in reality. There is no logical way for us to exist, it just isn’t possible.” Logic’s tone had gotten harsher and more desperate as his outburst continued and he ended it by crossing his arms.

 

“Aww, come on Lo, you know that’s not true. We’ve always existed, just not, ya’ know. Physically.”

 

“Wait what,” Thomas finally found the mental strength to jump back into the conversation. “What do you mean you’ve always existed?” The three sides looked at each other. This was going to be a long day.

 

* * *

 

October 21st, 2016 2:32 PM

“Wait, wait, wait you’re saying Thomas is a witch?” Anxiety couldn’t believe what he was hearing. But Mag simply sighed in exasperation as they got up from their chair and started pulling out spell books.

 

“I thought I told you ages ago, magic is genetic. It’s in the blood, I could’ve sworn we discussed this already.” Anxiety continued pacing in front of Mag’s desk, nervously fidgeting with his hands. His magic had been reigned in for the most part, but there was still the occasional spark in his hands.

 

“Yeah, you said that but I didn’t think any of it was like, real. I thought that was just the reasoning that Creativity’s realm made for everything, I didn’t think it translated to real life!” Mag dropped a large stack of books onto their desk with a huff.

 

“Yeah right, like Creativity’s realm is ever that detailed. All these rules and spells and books, hell an entire language, and you didn’t think for even a minute that maybe this was bigger than some random daydream? He can’t even get the night sky correct when he’s trying, you really think Thomas’s dreamscape is complex enough to invent an entire language accidentally?” That made Anxiety stop in his tracks. Of course there was more to it, he just wasn’t observant enough to realize. But now that it was pointed out to him, it made sense. It explained why Mag was so powerful, so independent. It’s because they weren’t a figment of Creativity’s imagination, they were a _side_.

 

“You represent Anxiety, The Prince is Creativity, The Teacher is Logic, The Father is Morality. I am Thomas’s Magic. Buried and hidden away, most likely out of a combination of fear and lack of knowledge. I don’t even know if his parents even realize what they are, he definitely doesn’t.” _Was it really that simple? Was Magnus a side?_ It made sense, but something wasn’t adding up. Something was still off. But he didn’t have time to figure that out now, one thing at a time. Right, _one thing at a time._

 

“So, wait but if Thomas has been a witch this whole time that means his magic was lying dormant. And the only way to wake up magic is by intense study and focus or a life threatening situation right?”

 

“Right.” Anxiety shot a curious look at Mag as they began flipping through one of thing books.

 

“Then how d-”

 

“How did Thomas’s magic wake up, yes that’s what I’m trying to figure out. Grab a book from the pile and help me look. I’m sure there’s an explanation for this, we just have to find it.” So Anxiety walked over and picked up a book. And the two witches got to work.

 

* * *

 

October 21st, 2016 2:55 PM

“So, basically, you guys actually _are_ sides of my personality, I’ve just never been aware of your existence until Creativity pointed it out?” Logic and the other sides had tried their best to explain what they knew, but their constant bickering and jabs at each other made it take much longer than it should have.

 

“Precisely. We’ve always been here, just living inside of your subconscious mind. Running things behind the scenes as it were.” Logic was careful to leave out the more complicated details, or the things Thomas wasn’t ready to hear yet. While he didn’t agree with hiding information, he also knew that there was only so much Thomas could handle in one afternoon.

 

“And it’s so cool to finally meet you kiddo! Oh we’re gonna have so much fun now,” Morality practically shouted.

 

“Yes! This will make filming videos way easier. Think of all the amazing things we could make!” Creativity was quick to jump on the excitement, but both sides hesitated when Logic cut in.

 

“Well, let’s not get ahead of ourselves. We still don’t know what is happening, why we are here, or how long we can stay. This still doesn’t make any sense. We are the embodiment of subconscious functions, the key word in that statement being subconscious. We aren’t even supposed to exist on a conscious level, so how can we exist on a physical one?” The others shifted uncomfortably at Logic’s words. No one had an easy answer, and no one wanted to say the difficult one.

 

“Are…” Thomas started speaking slowly, he knew what this meant and his voice came out slow and quiet. “Are we sure this is real?”

 

“Yes. Yes I am certain, this,” Creativity paused. “This isn’t a dream.”

 

“But he didn’t ask if this is a dream, Creativity. He asked if this is real. And frankly, since your existence is one of the things in question your alibi has little to no credibility.” More nervous glances were shared. _Was this really a dream? ...Had he lost his mind?_ Thomas couldn’t help a slight smile as he realized, no his mind was right in front of him. But the amusement faded quickly.

 

“Well, I dunno how much comfort this brings but, if it makes a difference kiddo, this feels right.” Thomas and the others turned to Morality and none of them could deny that what he said was true. This felt right. And Thomas was struck with the odd realization that while he felt anxious, another part of him felt confident and in control in a way that he’d never felt before. It was strange and unnatural yet, it felt so, so right.

 

“Okay, well how about this, we’ll just invite Joan over later and see what happens!” Creativity grinned at his new idea.

 

“Actually, that could work. If they see us then we’re proven real and well, we’ll cross that bridge when we get there I suppose.” Thomas felt something flicker inside of him. A feeling he couldn’t quite place and an urge he couldn’t contradict.

 

“No, no we can’t do that.” The three sides looked at Thomas in confusion.

 

“Uh, sure we can kiddo. All we gotta do is make a quick phone call.”

 

“Or even send a text! They won’t even know something is wrong.”

 

“The other are right Thomas. You call upon Joan, or any number of your friends, on a rather regular basis for no reason at all, other than a longing for comfort. And statistically, Joan is not only the one you call on the most, they are also the one with the best response time.”

 

“No. No we aren’t getting them involved. We aren’t getting anyone involved. It’s…” Thomas struggled to find the words to explain why. He didn’t even know why. He didn’t know why he was saying this but just the thought of others knowing, of others finding out made his stomach twist in a way that made him want to vomit. No one could know. _No one could know._

 

“It’s too risky. We don’t know what this is, we don’t know what’s causing it. We can use cameras or something to see if this is real, we can just go on like normal. We can try to film a video and see if it works, I don’t care but, we don’t speak a word of this, to anyone, alright? No one can know.” _No one can know._

 

* * *

 

October 21st, 2016 3:12 PM

“Well, at least we know his instincts are awake.” Mag sighed as Anxiety blinked away the purple light that had filled his eyes. Books covered the desk and surrounded Ann, where he sat on the floor. Anxiety had decided to check in on Thomas and the others, briefly looking through Thomas’s senses. He had been relieved when Thomas decided to keep things a secret, it made his job way easier. But…

 

“What do you mean his instincts?” Mag was standing behind their desk, flipping through pages of various books, glancing between all of them as though that would somehow make the process faster. _It didn’t._ Mag groaned and slammed closed one the books before tossing in to the floor haphazardly. They stood stiff and tense and Ann almost regretted asking the question or speaking at all.

 

“Most witches, upon activating their magic, feel an overwhelming urge to keep it a secret from anyone who hasn’t already shown signs of having magic blood. It’s a survival instinct born from years of prosecution. And since Thomas has never seen anyone use magic before, doesn’t even realize he’s doing it, obviously this means he’s gonna keep it a secret from everyone.” Anxiety nodded and turned back to look at the book he had open on his lap.

 

“Well, that makes our job easier doesn’t it?”

 

“No!” Ann jumped as Mag slammed another book. “It doesn’t. It makes your job easier, sure, he’s not gonna throw himself at a burning stake or land himself in an asylum but I only have so much instinctual knowledge to go by here, and no way to get more. If he doesn’t start asking questions himself then how am I supposed to-” Mag stops mid sentence, eyes staring at a sentence in one of the open books. “Holy shit.”

 

“What?” Mag picks up the book and holds it closer, quickly reading over the passage they stumbled across.

 

“ _Holy shit.”_

 

“What? What is it?!” And then, as Anxiety starts to stand up, they start laughing.

 

“Holy shit, I’m a moron. God, I’m moron it’s right here!” They start cackling more and Anxiety is torn between taking a step forward to look and taking a step backward to run.

 

“Uh, Mag? Would you like to share what you found with the class or?” Mag grins and turns the book around in their hands, showing it to Anxiety, who takes the book with shaking hands.

 

“ _While it is true that beings without magic blood cannot create or affect any magic on their own, they can be used to strengthen magic that already exists. Some Witches theorize that if enough people believe that a spell or curse exists, the spell in question will intensify exponentially. However, this would require a lot of people and a witch willing to put themselves and their magic in the public eye, which as all witches know is practically a death sentence. Therefore, this theory has never been tested or proven.”_ When Anxiety had finished reading the paragraph he looked up at Mag with wide eyes.

 

“So wait, this means that-”

 

“Yes! Thomas’s fans believed in the sides so much that they jumped started Thomas’s magic. Which, considering Thomas’s magic class, makes perfect sense!” Anxiety took a deep breath and gently set the book back down on the desk.

 

“Wait, Thomas’s magic class? I thought it was impossible to tell a witch’s magic class until after their magic has woken up?” Mag didn’t stop grinning for a second.

 

“Yes, but his magic is awake now, and even if it wasn’t there are plenty of clues. Thomas’s magic class is creation magic.” Now that the shock was gone, Anxiety’s hesitation and suspicious nature came back in full swing.

 

“Creation magic?”

 

“Yes, it is one of the rarest and most powerful types of magic, but it is the only one that makes sense. Think about it, I create illusions, you create storms and electricity, and we all know that Creativity has more sway than the rest of us. As annoying as he is, there is no denying how powerful and vast his realm is. All of our magic types can be traced back to the idea that we are creating something, and now Thomas has _created_ actual beings. Which normally wouldn’t be possible regardless of magic but the nature of the situation combined with a few thousand people’s belief has made it possible.” Anxiety knew this was probably a big, impressive thing that he should probably be proud of but… something felt off.

 

“...Does this mean Thomas is going to start randomly creating stuff because he has no idea how to control his powers and neither of us are real yet so we can’t help him?” Mag’s smile dropped as they stared him. Silence held for a long moment.

 

“Oh. Well _shit.”_


	12. Chapter 12

November 5th, 2016 9:24 PM

“Mag, I’ve got another useless one.” Anxiety tossed yet another book at Mag, who caught it and placed it on one of the shelves behind them. The two of them had been working tirelessly to find a way to keep Thomas’s magic under control. Unfortunately, there wasn’t really a protocol or spell for the subconscious mind to control the conscious one. But of course, that wasn’t going to keep Magnus from trying, and there was no way Anxiety was going to just leave them to their own devices with something like that. It had actually gotten to the point where sometimes Anxiety forgot to go back to his room and Mag had gotten into a habit of leaving some pillows and blankets in piles around  the back of the cave in case one or both of them randomly passed out from exhaustion. 

 

“Here,” Mag threw one of the pillows at Ann, “take a break, check in on Thomas, sleep, whatever. You’ve been at it since noon.” Anxiety groaned, but knew his mentor was right. So he moved onto one of the piles of blankets up against the wall and sat criss cross on top of it. He knew he needed sleep, but he also knew he wouldn’t be able to rest without checking in on Thomas. So he took a deep breath and closed his eyes, and when he opened them again they were glowing a deep violet color, the same shade as his lightning. Mag had seen him do this multiple times now, but they still found themselves intrigued by it. But Anxiety couldn’t see Magnus or the cave, instead he saw Thomas’s familiar apartment. He saw the TV playing an episode of the Office. He saw one of Thomas’s friends, Joan, asleep on the couch. Everything was fine, Thomas was safe, Joan was safe. He nudged Thomas to turn the volume down on the TV so Joan wouldn’t wake up, then he blinked away the image. 

 

“Well Thomas hasn’t accidentally made any nightmare creatures or a thunderstorm in his apartment so no changes there.” Mag let out a sharp bark of laughter. 

 

“What, so I’m a nightmare creature now?” Anxiety smirked and shrugged before laying down.

 

“I don’t know, you are a dra-” He stopped. Something was off. He quickly sat up and started glancing around the cave, frantically searching for what was wrong.

 

“Ann? What’s-” 

 

“DRAGONWITCH!” Mag and Anxiety turned to each other and locked eyes. They both knew that voice, and they knew what it meant. The Prince would turn the corner at any second. Anxiety dove behind the large pile of gold and gems as Mag transformed into their dragon form. They leaped over Anxiety, landing on top of their horde and effectively placing themselves between their student and the on coming threat. 

 

“Alright you fiend, I’m afraid you and I need to have a little chat,” The prince said as he rounded the corner to face the dragon. 

 

“Oh do we? I thought I was a heartless monster who could never be trusted. What could we have to talk about?” Anxiety could hear the smirk in Mag’s voice and knew that the dragon was trying to buy time.

 

“Oh no, I don’t trust you at all, and this doesn’t change that. But, you are a witch yes?” Mag paused for a moment. Anxiety tensed. It wasn’t a secret that Mag was a witch, Creativity was the one who coined the term dragonwitch, why was he asking? 

 

“Yes, you know this Creativity. Why are you asking me questions you already know the answer to?” 

 

“So if I were to ask you a question about magic, you’d be able to answer it right?” Anxiety couldn’t see Mag or Creativity so he could only imagine the faces they were making. But he knew that wherever this was going wouldn’t end well. If Creativity caught him one of two things would happen. Creativity would either assume Anxiety was working with the dragonwitch or that he was kidnapped by the dragonwitch. Option one would result in Anxiety getting killed and option two would destroy the reputation Anxiety had been working so hard to build. Anxiety heard the sound of gold coins falling and glanced behind him to see that Mag had sat down on the pile, effectively blocking Creativity’s view of the back of the cave.

 

“I suppose I could answer your questions yes, but what’s in it for me? You are my enemy. Why would I tell you anything?” Maybe if he made a run for it, he could sneak into Mag’s bedroom where he’d be safe. 

 

“Well how about you answer my questions and I’ll agree not to kill you.” A roar of laughter filled the cave and echoed off the wall. A chill ran down Anxiety’s spine. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to pretend to be a captive, if it meant Creativity would protect him. 

 

“Please, you wouldn’t be able to kill me if you tried, and you have. Many times. Go home little prince. Come back when you have something worth trading.”  _ Please don’t come back.  _ The Prince scoffed.

 

“Like I’d ever trade with  _ you _ . Augh, I knew this was a mistake. Go rot in hell you foul beast, I’ve got a kingdom to run.” Anxiety relaxed as the sound of footsteps echoed in the cave and grew quieter and quieter. The Prince had left just as strangely as he had arrived. The sound of coins rattling rang out as Magnus slumped down to lay on their horde.

 

“Hey Ann, what the fuck was that?” Anxiety chuckled humorlessly, trying and failing to hide how nervous he was. 

 

“Dude, I have no idea.” Mag sighed and shifted again as the darker side stood on shaky legs. Mag turned so they were curled up with their head facing the back of the cave. It wasn’t often that Ann saw Magnus in their dragon form, and it was taking him a moment to remind himself that Mag was a… well they weren’t going to chomp his head off. 

 

“Well, come on then. Grab a blanket and pillow and get over here.” Anxiety blinked at Mag, wondering if he’d heard them right. 

 

“W-what?” The dragon rolled their eyes.

 

“You need to sleep, but the prince could return at any moment. Either go pass out on my bed or pass out next me. Either way you’ll be protected, but I have a feeling it’ll be hard to fall asleep in a room by yourself.” Anxiety felt his face heat up,  _ did he remember to apply foundation this morning?  _ He shifted his feet and stared at the floor for a moment. When he made up his mind he walked over to the pile of soft bedding and dragged it onto the horde of gold and gems. Close enough to sense Mag next to him but far enough away that it wasn’t uncomfortable. The anxious side laid down with their back to Mag, not wanting to see the smug look he knew was on their face.

 

“Breathe a word of this to anyone and I’ll tell Creativity your weakness.” Mag chuckled and lowered their head to rest somewhere behind Ann. He tensed for a moment as they wrapped their tail around him, not touching him or his bedding but definitely encircling him. 

 

“You don’t know my weakness and even if you did he’d never believe you. In fact, he’d be suspicious about how you knew it. Sleep, little Storm Cloud, before you run yourself into the ground. You’re useless if you’re too tired to do anything.” Ann sighed and closed his eyes in resignation. Mag was right, Creativity would never even consider trusting him, and he’d be useless if he wasn’t at his best. So Anxiety fell into a light, restless sleep. And he didn’t notice the grin that spread over the dragon’s face as they gazed down at their horde. 

 

* * *

 

November 14th, 2016 11:32 PM

Over the last few weeks Thomas’s life returned to normal. Well, as normal as it can be with three other versions of himself popping up at random. They quickly established that the three of them could appear and disappear at need, easily shifting between the mindscape and reality. And despite this new, strange ability that none of them could explain, the sides fell into his life naturally, as though they’d always been there. There were arguments, of course. Bickering about various things, and Logic still wasn’t completely over the whole “this shouldn’t be possible, we aren’t meant to  _ exist _ ” thing. But despite the chaos of it all, it felt natural. Like a puzzle piece falling into place. In fact, it felt so normal that none of Thomas’s friends noticed any change in behavior. They didn’t ask any awkward questions, didn’t seem suspicious at all. Except that one time Morality forgot Leo was asleep on the couch while he snuck into the kitchen and stole some pizza. Luckily, Thomas realized what was happening before Morality could make any loud sounds. So Thomas decided that until there was an issue, he wouldn’t question it. He didn’t expect an issue to appear so quickly.

 

He was sitting on his couch, just watching old Steven Universe episodes late at night. He knew he should be working on his sleep schedule or something, but it was only 11:30, he could stay up a little longer. Which was mistake number one. A couple hours passed and the theme song for the next episode started playing and Thomas, maybe out of habit or maybe he was too exhausted and excited to care about the fact that he did in fact have neighbors, started singing. Mistake number two. The episode continued, he’d seen it before but it was just so emotional that he was firmly sucked into the show. Plus it was late, he was tired, it was his own home and he’d been hanging out with Patton a lot lately and maybe the fatherly side’s intense displays of emotion were starting to rub off on him. There were a lot of reasons, a lot of excuses, but none of them ever really gave an explanation for why he was feeling extra emotional that night. He grinned and sung along with Greg and Steven at the beginning of the episode. He cringed at the awkward tension between Pearl and Greg. He teared up when Pearl sang her solo on the balcony. And when Steven started singing his song at the end of the episode he stood and started dancing with himself in his living room, closing his eyes and singing along. He could feel Creativity’s presence in his mind, he knew the princely side was excitedly watching, pushing Thomas’s actions. And that had been the biggest mistake of the evening. 

 

The song ended, and the first thing Thomas did after opening his eyes was scream. It was more of a yelp really, made out of shock rather than fear. Although he did feel pretty scared. He looked around slowly, taking in the sight of his apartment as an uncomfortable pit grew in his stomach. All of the objects in his apartment had turned either a golden yellow or a deep blue, while the walls and floor were a vibrant pink. He felt his heart rate pick up as he cautiously looked down at his hands. The breath he didn’t realize he was holding pushed its way out of his lungs slowly and deliberately as he saw that at least his hands were still their normal color. He felt panic roaring deep inside of him. He felt something else, something that was trying very hard to keep him under control. On top of that he felt excitement and he felt confusion. He felt his mind working in a way that he’d never really been conscious of before and the panic intensified. The panic forced his voice into motion.

 

“Creativity! Logic! Something’s wrong, please help, help, get up here right now!” The sides he called for appeared almost immediately, as though they were just waiting for him to call them. Two voices started speaking simultaneously.

 

“Okay, calm down, there has to be a reasonable explanation for this.”

 

“Oh my gosh this is so cool! It’s exactly how I was picturing it and ahhh it’s like we’re in a cartoon!” Both Thomas and Logic turned to stare at Creativity.

 

“Y… you caused this?” The prince looked a little uncomfortable at the tone in Thomas’s voice, combined with the stare down he was getting.   

 

“We-well… not intentionally. But it’s fine! I’m sure this is just another unusual thing that transforms into a normal thing, like us! This isn’t a bad thing, it’s just-”

 

“It’s just something that is apparently destroying and/or disregarding the rules of reality. A thing that means either the carefully balanced laws of physics and nature that hold our reality in place are deteriorating or Thomas is losing his sanity and hallucinating!” 

Thomas felt his breathing pick up. What was worse? Losing sanity or losing reality? The most likely option was that he was hallucinating.  _ Oh god he was hallucinating he was going insane he was- _

 

**“Thomas!”** He jumped as the two sides spoke at once. No,  _ three _ sides spoke at once. Morality was standing in front of him now, with Creativity on the right and Logic on the left. Morality slowly stepped forward, gently taking Thomas’s hands in his, taking Thomas’s hands from where they were tightly wrapped around fistfuls of his shirt. Thomas didn’t know when he started shaking. Thomas didn’t know when he had started holding onto himself, just to be holding  _ something _ . The fatherly side’s eyes were filled with so much care and concern and fear and love as they stared into Thomas’s eyes, reflecting everything Thomas was feeling. Morality lifted up one of his hands to wipe a tear off of Thomas’s face. Thomas didn’t know when he started crying.

 

“What’s happening to me?” His voice came out small, and far more timid than he wanted. But Morality smiled and replied with a warmth Thomas wasn’t expecting. 

 

“I don’t know. I don’t know what’s going on or how we’re going to get out of it. But I don’t know a lot of things kiddo, and that’s never stopped me before. I’m not smart like Logic or inventiony like Creativity-

 

“It’s inventive”

 

“Whatever, I just said I’m not smart Logic. But I know you, and I know what you’re feeling. And it’s okay, cause we’ve felt these emotions before. We’re gonna get through this, together. So cheer up kiddo, you’ve got your family with you to back you up.” Thomas couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face. He was still panicked, he was still confused, he was still so, so scared. But Morality was right. He wasn’t alone. Well, he was but he wasn’t-  _ god this was confusing.  _ He was sick of thinking about this, so he just gave into his feelings and did what he felt was right, which at that moment was giving Morality a massive hug. After a few moments, Creativity joined in, while Logic briefly, and only a bit awkwardly, gave Thomas a pat on the shoulder. It wasn’t until later that they realized that at some point during their discussion, the apartment had changed back to the way it was meant to be.


	13. Chapter 13

November 14th, 2016 1:32 AM

It was another evening of studying spell books with Anxiety, and at this point Mag wasn’t even sure what they were looking for.  _ A way to limit Thomas’s magic? Stop him from hurting himself? Or attracting unwanted attention? To control it? To become… real?  _ They weren’t sure yet. They were just looking for… something. Something that would help them cope with… this. It was at that moment that their readings and ponderings were interrupted by a loud shout of pain. Mag felt their heartbeat spike as they shot up from their desk, at Anxiety’s side before he closed his mouth. 

 

“Ann? Storm Cloud what happened? Are you hurt?” The dark side shook his head, and as he opened his eyes Mag realized they were glowing purple. They knew what that meant, and it was nothing good. Mag had never been bothered by their blindness to the outside world until this whole mess started, but now they were willing to trade anything to just be able to see what was threatening their…  _ treasured _ apprentice. But they couldn’t think about that now, Anxiety was starting to hyperventilate. 

 

“I- Mag- Magnus it’s Thomas, he- h-he used his powers- his magic it’s- it’s- it’s-” Each of the stutters in his speech were punctuated with sharp gasps and Mag knew he wasn’t going to be able to hold on for much longer. 

 

“Ann, relax alright? Breathe, slow and steady now, match my breathing.” Mag was gripping him by the shoulders now, and they knew they were probably bruising him but that’s fine. The pain would help ground him. ... _ Probably _ . He was still scared, but at least now he had blinked away the purple and was looking at Mag now. 

 

“M-Mag what if-” Mag took one hand and held Anxiety’s head in their hand.

 

“Shh, it’s okay my little Storm Cloud. Just focus on me and tell me what you saw.” Ann’s breathing picked up again. 

 

“Thomas- he used his magic and- and it- it was-” Mag squeezed his shoulder again with the hand that was still placed there.  _ The pain seemed to work the first time, right?  _

 

“Easy there Ann, you can’t speak if you can’t breathe. And if you can’t speak I can’t help you. So breathe Storm Cloud, breathe and focus on me.” Anxiety struggled to match their breathing, but eventually he managed to calm it enough to speak. 

 

“He- He turned his apartment pink. A-and the furniture and stuff in it- everything else was golden and b-blue.” Well, it wasn’t perfect but Mag got the gist of what Anxiety was trying to tell them. 

 

“Okay, that means it was probably just a simple color swap. It might not even be real, he could be using illusion magic. Actually, transmogrification magic takes a lot focus, he almost definitely cast an illusion spell. So there’s nothing to worry about Storm Cloud, Thomas is perfectly safe.” Mag was spouting bullshit at this point, but whatever it took to get Ann to calm down. Well, it wasn’t complete bullshit, the spell thing was correct. But that didn’t mean Thomas was safe. Mag had no idea what the circumstances were. Regardless of their words’ validity, it seemed to do the trick.

 

“I told you to stop calling me Storm Cloud.” Mag smirked and stood to look down at the disgruntled side. 

 

“Oh? I thought you liked Storm Cloud. It was Stormy you kept complaining about.” Ann looked at the ground, and Mag had to wonder if he was blushing under that makeup. Oh well, he seemed embarrassed either way. Their apprentice slowly stood up, still a bit shaky but definitely better than he was a few moments ago. 

 

“W-whatever, it doesn’t matter. Thomas activated his magic, everyone’s at various levels of freaked out, but in the end Thomas is safe… I guess.” Mag smiled and walked back over to their desk. This simply means that they have less time to make up their mind than they thought. But that’s alright, they’d work something out. Actually, now that Mag wasn’t focusing on getting Anxiety under control, they noticed a strange calmness settling over them. A strength and confidence that wasn’t there before. A certain… rightness. They turned and studied their apprentice’s appearance once more. 

 

“Exactly, Thomas is safe, don’t worry about a thing. But Ann, how do you feel?” Their student raised an eyebrow at the question but answered nonetheless.

 

“Um, fine? Actually I feel… good. Well, not  _ good _ but more… solid? I guess? Wait, what is that? Did you cast a spell or something?”  _ Hmmmm. Interesting.  _ Mag put on a smile and sat down behind their desk, books long forgotten in favor of a new idea.

 

“No, no spells were cast. Well, other than the one you saw Thomas cast on accident. Just a feeling is all, nothing you need to worry about.” Mag knew that was a bad choice of wording by the suspicious look Ann gave them, but they also knew that the more Anxiety heard those words and had them come true, the more he would trust them. Not that the words necessarily  _ were _ true, but that didn’t really matter. 

 

“Fine, but we still need to decide what to do now.” It was Mag’s turn to raise an eyebrow. 

 

“Is there anything we can do? We’re stuck here, Storm Cloud, and until that fact changes we can’t change anything.” Mag was expecting an exclamation of annoyance at the level of helplessness the two of them were at. What they were not expecting was to be called out. 

 

“Hold on, what’s with the increase in nicknames? That’s like, the third time you’ve called me Storm Cloud tonight alone. Like, I get we’ve been spending a lot more time together lately, and the nickname isn’t exactly new or anything, you’ve just been saying it a lot lately.” The words ran together in a bit of a panic filled ramble, but Mag had been training Ann for awhile, they knew how to understand him by now. 

 

“Actually it’s been like, five times now. You’re getting rusty Ann, I thought it was your job to notice things?” To be honest, Mag wasn’t quite sure where this fondness for the dark side came from. Well, maybe fondness wasn’t the right word.  _ Possessiveness.  _ Yes, that was the word they were looking for. Which they supposed made sense, Ann was  _ their _ student. Mag hadn’t planned on things going this way when they made that deal all those years ago, but they definitely weren’t complaining. This was the outcome they were looking for, just a bit sooner than they anticipated. It didn’t matter that Anxiety was giving them a strange look right now, he’d forgive them. He only had a little over a year before his payment was due, they had him right where they wanted him.  _ Just one more year, and everything will be set in stone.  _ In the meantime...

 

“Whatever, forget I said anything. Let’s just see what we can do about Thomas’s magic. Have you found anything about shutting it off yet?” Mag put on what they hoped was a look of disappointed frustration. 

 

“No, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. We just have to keep looking, an idea will find us eventually. This is the kingdom of creativity after all.” Anxiety smirked and rolled his eyes, and Mag knew he was back to normal. His eyes flashed purple for a moment.

 

“Looks like Thomas and the others have switched to a movie night of some sort, so they should be safe for now.” Mag decided to tug on the thought that had been forming at the back of their mind. 

 

“Hey Anxiety, when you freak out, how much of that transfers over to Thomas?” Anxiety’s face shifted to confusion before slipping back on his mask of sadistic confidence.

 

“Why do you want to know?” Mag gave him a shrug. 

 

“Just curious if you having a panic attack will trigger Thomas’s defensive magic.” Anxiety’s face didn’t move but they saw the alarm in his eyes. 

 

“Thomas only feels the panic that I choose to give him, unless I get overwhelmed. Either way he must feel something, but it will always be a fraction of what I feel unless I intentionally shove everything onto him and push him into full panic mode. He won’t hurt anyone, not while I can help it.”  _ Interesting.  _ It wasn’t the answer Mag was expecting. No, it was better than Mag was expecting.  _ This could end up working out quite nicely. _

 

“So you control what level of panic Thomas feels, the same way Creativity can control what ideas go to Thomas and what ideas die within the subconscious, to a certain extent of course.” Anxiety’s eyes were guarded, they overstepped. 

 

“To an extent, yes. Why, is that important?” Mag gave the most innocent smile they could manage.

 

“No, nothing important at all.” And of course, neither of them believed that for a second.

 

* * *

 

November 14th, 2016 1:53 AM

Thomas and his sides were all spread out on his couch in the living room, Logic at the far end, Morality cuddled up next to Thomas, and Creativity dramatically laid out on top of them, his head in Morality’s lap and his feet in Logic’s. Thomas didn’t seem to mind that he was surrounded on all sides by, well technically by himself.  _ That was still gonna take some getting used to.  _ Creativity had put in Mulan as the first Disney movie of the night, and Thomas had a feeling it wouldn’t be the last. The four of them watched the movie in relative silence, for once Creativity was the only one bursting into song. They all knew they weren’t getting to sleep after what happened. Creativity was too excited, Logic was thinking too hard, and Morality was too worried. It was a stressed, but still comfortable silence. His mind was working through some stuff, and he was happy to sit with it and watch movies in the meantime. He didn’t really expect any of them to speak up, and he didn’t really want to disturb the silence either, but there was something he needed to say. 

 

“Hey, Morality?” 

 

“Hmm?” The fatherly side glanced over at him. 

 

“I was uh, I was really impressed with what you said. And uh, thanks for calming me down.” Morality blinked at him for a moment before breaking out into a big smile. Logic cleared his throat from his end of the couch.

 

“Thomas is right. You expressed a maturity and wisdom that none of us were really expecting from you Morality. You managed to calm the situation much faster than Creativity and I could, and for that we thank you.” Morality was giggling and blushing from the praise now, the grin never leaving his face.

 

“Aww, thanks kiddos! I really appreciate that. But I am the dad character, keeping everyone calm and mature is kinda my job.” It was then that Creativity perked up.

 

“Oh, I know! Next Sander Sides video can be about Morality teaching Thomas adult stuff! It’ll be great, the fans will love it.” Thomas and Morality now had huge grins on their faces while Logic simply looked thoughtful. Thomas knew the teacher was already starting to write out a plan to make it work. And Thomas knew that despite the panic that was caused that evening, and the implications it had, this could work.  _ He would make it work.  _


	14. Chapter 14

December 4th, 2016 12:36 AM 

As the month passed and holiday times swiftly started approaching, Anxiety and Mag slowly fell back into their old routine. Their all-nighters and frantic three-day-long sleepovers were getting them nowhere, and Ann needed all the focus he could get to deal with the most stressful time of year. Plus, Mag had been acting strangely, insisting that even though they hadn’t found anything yet, everything would be fine. The darker trait didn’t like it, but he knew better than to argue at this point. 

 

Tonight was one of their research nights, although the two of them had long since gotten out of the habit of keeping a consistent schedule. Without a word, Anxiety walked into the cave, grabbed a book off of the shelf, and sat down on one of the remaining piles of bedding that Mag had still neglected to clean up. It wasn’t until twenty minutes later that Mag stepped out of their room wearing a simple skirt and button up shirt. Mag glanced at him and then went to retrieve a book of their own. 

 

“You’re here early,” Mag said. Ann raised an eyebrow.

 

“It’s almost one.” Mag paused for a moment, glancing at the watch on their arm. 

 

“...So it is.” There was a silence as Anxiety glanced up at Mag before quickly looking back at his book.

 

“You wanna explain what just happened there?” There was a deep, drawn out sigh, and then a creak as they pulled out the chair to their desk and sat down. 

 

“Not really, but I know it’ll bother you if I don’t.” 

 

“Then explain.” 

 

“...It’ll also bother you if I do.” Anxiety closed his book and turned to actually face Mag. It had been awhile since the witch had been so cryptic, and the darker trait had never heard his mentor sound quite so defeated. Except, when Anxiety actually took a moment to look up at his mentor, he realized that Mag wasn’t feeling defeated at all. They were  _ pretending _ , they were hiding a smirk.  _ Something was off. What if- _

 

“...Tell me anyway.” It didn’t matter the warning signs, he had to act natural. And if Mag was going to act coldly, then Anxiety was going to match them. Mag sat up fully and looked him in the eyes. Their expression didn’t change, not really, but when their eyes met all Anxiety could see was pure excitement. 

 

“Okay, I know you’re going to hate this, but if you pause long enough to hear me out and listen to my reasoning, you’ll see what a brilliant plan it is.” Well that certainly doubled the amount of warning bells in his head, but his mask didn’t waiver.

 

“I mean, I can’t promise anything, but I’ll try.” Mag allowed themselves to smile. 

 

“That’s good enough for now, I suppose. I can’t really expect you to have more self control than that.”  _ Huh, that kinda sounded like a insult. _ “The plan is simple really, but I would first like to clarify the end goal. I know how to make you real.” And now Anxiety was on his feet, standing in front of Mag’s desk and staring at them in shock. There were so many questions, so many  _ what ifs,  _ so many fears, but only one escaped his lips. 

 

“How?” Mag pressed their lips together, and if Ann didn’t know better he would think it was a sign of nervousness. But Anxiety knew Mag, it was a sign of them trying to fight off a grin. 

 

“Well, Thomas and Creativity seem to be creating these ‘Sander Sides’ videos as a way to work through issues and also teach people life lessons, right?”  _ Something is off. This is wrong.  _

 

“Yeah…?” Mag’s lips twitched upward, and Ann realized it was the same expression they had when they were about to explain one of their favorite spells. Bursting with excitement, but wanting to give it a slow and over dramatic explanation.  __

 

“And being in a video is almost guaranteed to make you real, right? So…”  _ Wait. They couldn’t mean-  _ “what if you gave them a problem to solve?” Every muscle Anxiety had tensed, and the hairs on the back of his neck stood up. And for just a moment, he couldn’t tell if it was out of fury or fear. 

 

“What? What are you… Magnus, what  _ exactly _ are you asking of me?” Mag sighed, as though they were somehow disappointed by Anxiety’s response. 

 

“You control how much of your, well,  _ youness _ , gets transferred to Thomas right? So, if you make is so his anxiety starts to skyrocket for no apparent reason, he’ll notice a problem and start looking for ways to fix it. This will of course inspire Cre-”

 

**_“No!”_ ** Mag jumped as the dark trait slammed his hands onto the desk, hands that they noticed were sparking with power and white hot electricity. His voice was distorted in a way they hadn’t heard since his magic was activated and they stared up at him with wide eyes, frozen in place.  

 

“I-I uhm but-” Anxiety practically growled out his next words, which were filled with a furious rage that not even he expected. 

 

**“I will NOT hurt him. I don’t care about your excuses, I don’t care about your reasoning. I will keep. Him. SAFE. ...Do you understand?”** The witch visibly gulped, and then they paused for a moment. Their next words come with a surprising level of confidence.

 

“I understand your concern, but isn’t this action necessary to keep him safe? He doesn’t know anything about his powers, he is a danger to both himself and those around him. But you can fix that, you know things he doesn’t, you could help him!” The dark trait bared his teeth and simply glared harder.

 

“ **I will not hurt him!”** Mag stood up from their chair, tired of being looked down on.

 

“Oh for god’s sake, you hurt him all the time, how is this any different?!” Anxiety faltered at that. 

 

“ **W-** what?” Mag sighed.

 

“You hurt him all the time idiot. Giving him anxiety, feeding him fear, preventing him from doing things, it all hurts him. But it also keeps him alive in the long run, I don’t see how this is any different!” The glare and ferocity returned.

 

“ **That’s different!”**

 

“Is it?! Tell me Anxiety, is it different?! He needs you, Ann. He has no idea what he’s doing, his magic is going to get out of control eventually. He is a danger to himself and everyone around him, but you can  _ help  _ him.” His eyes finally fell to the floor and he felt frustration mix with the anger that was still pumping through him. He noticed that the floor looked charred and black as sparks continued to run up and down his body. 

 

“I can’t Mag, I can’t just do that to him without a-”

 

“Without what, without a valid reason?! Anxiety, this is the best excuse you could ever get!” They pause for a moment and then start again, their words softer now. “He  _ needs _ your help. But you can’t help anyone from here. In here you’re useless, and you don’t want to be useless do you?” Anxiety flinched and his fists curled even tighter. He felt his magic still roaring within him, fueled by the emotions he still hasn’t rid himself of yet. He still wasn’t sure if the emotions stemmed from fury or fear. 

 

“I’m not useless here. I still keep Thomas in check. I’ve been keeping him alive this long, haven’t I? If his magic is really this dangerous, I’ll just make him too scared to use it.” For a moment the air was silent. Then it filled with chilling laughter as Mag dissolved into giggles that shifted to full blown cackling that filled the cave. 

 

“Y-you can’t use fear to control someone’s powers, that’s not- that’s not how it works. I mean look at yourself! You can’t even get worked up without electrocuting everything around you and you’ve had years of training. Fear fuels magic, remember?  It’s how I woke you up, it’s the main way most magic wakes up. Waking up magic is practically part of your job description when you think about it. I mean, following that line of logic the only way you could ever even  _ hope  _ to turn his combat magic off from the inside is by killing yourself.” Anxiety’s breath hitched at those words, and for a moment his mind went blank. But the moment passed and his primary instincts kicked in. 

 

“It doesn’t matter, I w **ill not hurt him. There has to be another way, I refuse to just-** to just-just give him a panic attack without warning! There’s things to be anxious about, of course there’s always things to worry about, to keep him safe from and wary of, but I’m not going to disable him just because you think that’s the only way to help him!” Mag’s amusement slipped from their face, and now they simply looked on with annoyance. Anxiety knew he was spiraling and he knew he was starting to lose his intimidation factor but  _ what was Mag thinking?! He couldn’t do that to Thomas, he could NEVER do that to Thomas. How could Mag ask that of him???  _ He knew first hand how vicious a panic attack was and he wouldn’t wish it on his worst enemy.  _ Unless they hurt Thomas, of course.  _

 

“ _ Anxiety _ .” He tensed and looked up at Mag’s tone of voice. Commanding and chilling in a way that formed a heavy feeling in his stomach, but the words shifted to sickly sweet before they could continue. “I know you’re scared, but this is for the best. It’s the only way to make you real, you have to let Thomas know you’re here. Creativity would never put you in a video except to cast you as a villain, and if you tried to tell him the truth he’d just as likely laugh at you as he would kill you for it. My idea is your only shot and you know it.” 

 

“...No. No Magnus, I’m not… I’m not doing it. I’m not going to torture Thomas to get what I want, I-” 

 

“But you do want it.” Anxiety stiffened and turned away. 

 

“Of course I want it. There’s so many times where I want to just jump in front of the danger and save him from it. But it doesn’t matter what I want or what would make my job easier, Thomas’s safety and well-being comes first. It always comes first. It’s why I made the deal, remember? Because I don’t care what happens to me, so long as he is safe from harm.” That last part was a lie, he was literally the embodiment of Thomas’s self preservation instinct, of course he cared about what happened to himself.  _ But he cares about Thomas more.  _

 

“So you won’t even consider listening to reason? You won’t even consider the one plan we’ve come up with because you refuse to go against your instincts? Come on Storm Cloud, I thought you were better than this.” His shoulders slumped down, he still felt the emotions running through him, but now he was just too tired to fight. So instead he put on his smirk and glared at Mag with what he hoped was a threatening look.  _ It was time to end this. _

 

“What on Earth gave you the idea that I was better? I’m the one villain the Prince hates more than you. Did you ever stop and wonder why that is? Why he hates me more than you? It’s because I’m  _ Anxiety _ . I’m what stops dreams before they become unstable realities. I’m what holds ideas back because I’m apparently the only one who realizes just how dangerous they really are. I’m the one who protects Thomas from all of the dangerous and deceiving people in the outside world. And I’m the one who protects him from the one thing that can hurt him the most. I protect him from himself, and his own idiotic ideals. And in case you somehow haven’t noticed, that includes p **rotecting him from you** .” As Anxiety spoke a dark, black storm cloud began to form over his head, his form becoming coated in this black aura, while white and purple lightning shot down his arms and coiled around him. By this point, Mag had taken quite a few steps back. They narrowed their eyes, which had turned draconic, and a faint green mist was swirling around them.

 

“Is that a threat?” He deepened his smirk, practiced confidence now on full display.

 

“You threatened Thomas. Not only that but you used me to do it. So now we have two options,”  _ fight or flight?  _ “Either you apologize and back down, returning everything to normal, or I leave and I never come back.”  _ Wait, why did he say that?  _ He didn’t know if Mag would care, he didn’t even know if Mag wanted him.  _ Since when did he care if Mag wanted him?  _ But they glared and paused, clearing thinking it over. And if Mag had to think about it, he must have said something right. But then Mag straightened up and while their magic didn’t fade, they looked on with confidence.

 

“You wouldn’t leave.”

 

“I would-” 

 

“You have nowhere to go. No one to help you. The rest of the sides hate you, even deceit and his group loathe your existence despite the respect he and them have for you. The only friend you have, the only one who cares about you is  _ me _ . If you leave I can’t protect you, and you  _ will _ need protection next year. After your curse takes affect, you will need protection and I can give it to you. But you have to stay with me. You have to do this, Ann. You have to make yourself real to protect Thomas. And you have to stay with me to protect yourself.” 

 

There was a long silence. Slowly, the clouds dissolved, the aura faded, and the sparks quieted until Anxiety’s magic died down completely. He stared at the ground, face unreadable, shoulders slumped. And for a moment the Dragonwitch smiled. Then Anxiety let out a humorless chuckle. It was short and soft and filled pain. It made Magnus pause. 

 

“You haven’t been listening at all have you?” Their eyebrows furrowed. 

 

“Of course I listened, Storm Cloud. I always listen to you.” A laugh was torn from his throat. This one a bark, sharp and pained and soaked in tears that his pride would never let him shed in front of  _ them.  _

 

“No, no you don’t. I already told you, I don’t care what happens to me.” The witch’s eyes were wide and he raised his head to look at them. “So I’m leaving. You’re a threat to the people I was born to protect.” It was with that remark that he turned and he began walking out of the cave. He wasn’t sure what he expected.  _ To be stopped? To be yelled at? To be attacked?  _ But he was already in the darkness of the entrance when Mag spoke up. 

 

“He’ll kill you. When he finally sees you for what you are.” He paused for a moment, then with a shaky sigh he responded. 

 

“I know.” And then he was gone. 

 

* * *

 

December 6th, 6:32 PM

Anxiety sat on the floor of room, tucked into the farthest corner with his back to the wall. He hadn’t left his room since the argument with Mag, and he still didn’t know what to do. He knew that at some point during that time two people had knocked on his door. One knock had been the familiar three knock pattern of Logic wordlessly delivering a new set of books. The other had been an enthusiastic but worried Morality asking if he wanted any food. He didn’t answer either call. He didn’t even move. He simply sat in that corner, alternating between thinking over Mag’s plan and checking on Thomas. He wasn’t really considering doing Mag’s plan, but they may be on the right track. There might be a way to get into the videos. He’d never be treated as one of them, obviously, but maybe if he argued with Creativity enough he’d be made into a villain.  _ Actually… that could work.  _ If he taunted Creativity enough, he’d definitely get put in a video. He wondered why Mag didn’t think of that. ...He wondered if Mag would listen. Part of him wanted to stay here, and never see Mag ever again. But a larger part of him knew that despite his training, Mag was the better witch. And Anxiety would never be able to train Thomas by himself, even if he did become real. Plus, a small part of him knew that Mag was right.  _ If he leaves Mag, he’ll have no one.  _ But he also knew that it didn’t really matter if he was by himself, what mattered was Thomas. 

  
So now he had three solid choices. Crawl back to Mag and explain this new plan, and pray that Mag would listen, go and find the Prince to implement the plan without Mag’s help, or crawl back into bed and pretend the world doesn’t exist. With these ideas in mind, Anxiety moved for the first time in two days. He stood up, and he paced. As he paced the familiar length of his inner room, he fleshed out the possibilities of each option. Option three was ruled out immediately for obvious reasons, but he kept it in the back of his mind, more as a comfort than an actual idea. Then he started going over option two.  _ What if Creativity gets suspicious about how much Anxiety is interacting with him? What if it backfires, and Creativity deliberately refuses to put him in a video? What if he angers Creativity too much and the Prince just decides to kill him? What if, what if, what if, whatif-  _ Then, once all of the worst case scenarios were mapped out and taken into consideration, he moved on to option one.  _ What if Mag refuses to help? What if they’re still upset with him? What if they try to trick him into doing their plan? What if they get angry and kill him? No, wait they wouldn’t kill him, he can’t fulfill the deal if he’s dead. But what if they trap him? What if they hate him? What if, what if, whatif-  _ And that train of thought continued for quite awhile. And then he started comparing the possible outcomes of the two options. And he paced, back and forth. Back and forth. He didn’t even notice how many hours passed with him just pacing, the clock on the wall constantly moving slightly faster than a real one. And eventually, he stopped. Frozen in the middle of the room, he asked himself two more questions. What is the absolute worst thing that could result from option two?  _ Death and/or losing all hope of becoming real.  _ What is the worst thing that could result from option one?  _ Being on the receiving end of Magnus’s fury.  _ One option lead to death, the other to abandonment. And as scary as Magnus was, he knew who was scarier. So with a deep breath, and a double check that he had his blades, Anxiety walked up to the familiar door of his room and opened it. He had a dragonwitch to deal with.


	15. Chapter 15

December 7th, 2016 12:06 AM

_ This is a horrible idea,  _ Anxiety thought as he stepped up to the opening of the familiar cave. So many  _ what if _ s had been running through his head on the walk there, his daggers never leaving his hands. And now, standing in front of the home of his worst enemy and best friend, he was gripping the hilts of his blades so tightly his knuckles were white. For a moment, a spark of purple electricity circled around his body, wrapping him in a moment of self comfort. Then, with a deep breath, he tucked his blades into his jacket, silenced his magic, and walked into the darkness. The first thing he noticed after walking into the light was that Mag was not there. The second thing he noticed was the purple and black blankets and pillows arranged on top of the horde of treasure. An arrangement clearly meant for him. A chill went down his spine because on the one hand, Mag expected him to come back so they couldn’t possibly be  _ that  _ mad. On the other hand,  _ The Dragonwitch expected him to come back… so where are they?  _ He was halfway to the pile when a familiar voice called out from behind him.

 

“I was wondering how long it would take you to come back to your senses, Storm Cloud.” With a jolt, Anxiety turned to face his mentor. They were dressed in one of the most traditional outfits they had, one that Anxiety hadn’t seen since the night he made the deal. A dark cloak draped over a formal outfit that actually seemed like something The Prince would wear, bathed in crimson and black colors, with a white shirt underneath. Their eyes were draconic and glowing and everything in Anxiety screamed that  _ SOMETHING WAS OFF.  _

 

“Yeah, well. I figured it’d be kinda stupid to ditch the magic expert when dealing with something like this.” The Witch laughed as they stepped closer to Anxiety. Not too close but…  _ closer. _

 

“Very true. But don’t worry, I knew you’d be back. After all, you’re not stupid… Are you Ann?” Maybe it was the way Magnus said it. Maybe it was the faint glow in their emerald dragon eyes. Maybe it was the ~~tension~~ awkwardness in the air. Or maybe it was because Anxiety’s heart suddenly started beating out of his chest… but Anxiety stepped back. And his usual mask faltered.

 

“N-Nope. In fact, I’m so clever I came up with a new plan.” Mag stopped their movement and raised an eyebrow at the comment. The small smirk on their face grew but nothing about it matched the usual playful smirk Anxiety had grown used to seeing.

 

“Oh have you now? Well, don’t keep me in suspense Storm Cloud.” His blood turned to ice, and the familiar nickname that he would never admit to loving now felt… wrong.  _ Something was off Something was wrong.  _ Anxiety stepped back. 

 

“Well, the plan is simple. I’ll just start arguing with Creativity more. I’ll aggravate him until he gets so angry that he’ll make me the villain in his story. Similar to your plan, only instead of directly antagonizing Thomas I’ll aim it at Princy. I’ll become real and Thomas isn’t hurt, we both get what we want. R-right?” The Witch smiled and took another step forward. 

 

“Hmm, well that does sound like a decent plan Storm Cloud. I’m impressed, I really am. Except… you are wrong about one thing.”  _ This is wrong this is wrong tHIS IS WRONG.  _ Anxiety stepped back.

 

“Oh? And what am I wrong about? I’m no Logic, but I’ve thought this out. If there’s an issue we can just talk about it, right?” The same sickly sweet smile stayed on their face. The Witch stepped forward. 

 

“Oh Storm Cloud, I really wish you had just agreed to the plan. It would have made this so much easier.” Anxiety stepped back. 

 

“Uh, Mag? Maggie we can just talk about it, right?” The Dragonwitch stepped forward. 

 

“Relax Storm Cloud. There’s nothing to worry about.” Anxiety stepped back. And this time his foot hit gold. 

 

“Magnus, what was I wrong about?” The witch  _ smiled _ . The witch stepped forward. 

 

“You said that in your plan we both get what we want, but that simply isn’t true. It’s okay though, we can just make your idea plan B.” Anxiety couldn’t step back.  _ Wrong, wrong, wrong, this is wrong, you’ve gotta get out get OUT.  _

 

“Plan B? Then… what’s plan A?” The Dragonwitch’s smile grew. Their eyes glowed brighter. Green mist encircled them. 

 

“I did try to do this the easy way, Ann. But don’t worry I’m not upset you refused, disappointed maybe, but not upset. After all, there’s two ways to wake up magic, remember?” Sharp, burning pain filled Anxiety’s body as toxic green chains wrapped around him. He wasn’t sure if that was him screaming. He wasn’t sure if that was blood he felt. He wasn’t sure if the crackling in his ears was static or his own electricity. He wasn’t sure if that was Magnus laughing or Magnus crying. He wasn’t sure of much at all, but he was sure that he was in pain. And pain creates adrenaline and panic and  _ oh god what the fuck what the fuck was he dying? He had to be dying there was no way this was not dying oh god oh fuck fuck fuck he couldn’t die, not really, Thomas needed him, he NEEDED him, who would protect Thomas if he was DEAD?! No, no no no no Mag wouldn’t kill him would they? That doesn’t make sense but it hurts it hurts it hurts and what if this kills him? What if this hurts Thomas? What if this never ends what if this is life now what if Creativity finds him what if he dies here what if Creativity finds his corpse what if what if what if what if whatif whatif whatifwhatifwhatif-  _  And then the pain increased and the panic increased and suddenly all he saw was  _ PURPLE BLACK WHITE BLACK PURPLE GRAY PURPLE WHITE PURPLE WHITE WHITE PURPLE BLACK  _ **_GREEN_ ** _ - _

 

… And then he saw nothing. 

 

* * *

 

December 8th, 2016 3:43 AM

When Anxiety woke up he was laying on a soft bed of purple and black padding and pillows, and when he moved he realized he was also tucked under a matching plaid blanket. He almost panicked for a moment, unsure of where he was, until he turned and saw Mag sitting at their desk. They had a book open in their hand and two mugs sitting on the desk. A green one for them and a purple one placed on the end of the desk closest to Anxiety’s perch on top of the horde. At first glance, his instinct was to just take the invitation and sit on Mag’s desk like nothing was wrong. But it was then that Anxiety remembered what happened, and every muscle he had went tense.  _ Pain. Purple. Panic. White. _ His new instinct, now that he remembered the situation he was in, was to book it and sprint out of the cave as fast as his legs could carry him. But that would be stupid, there was no way Mag wasn’t aware that he was awake. And that was just the cherry on the cake wasn’t it? Mag knew he was awake, he knew they knew. And instead of speaking up or pressuring him, they simply pretended to read their book. They were giving him an invitation to sit and discuss it while also giving him a way out if he wasn’t ready. Which, honestly, was exactly what he needed. It was the kindest response they could give, which was frustrating because  _ they weren’t kind. They weren’t kind at all they were evil and greedy and a liar and god why did he still want to talk to them?!  _ So he sat there, on his fluffy little perch that gave him a view of the entire cave. He sat there and he worried and he thought and he evaluated the situation and he struggled with his stupid feelings and after who  ~~_ probably Mag _ ~~  knew how long he made a decision. 

Anxiety stood up, slipping a little on the loose coins under his bed, and with the plaid blanket still wrapped around him he walked up to the witch’s desk. He didn’t take the purple mug and he didn’t sit down. He spoke, in a small voice that was completely different from the confident voice Anxiety used but exactly like the timid voice that was  _ his _ .

 

“...What did you do to me?” Mag sighed and set their book down on the desk. They took a sip of the warm liquid in their mug, that by now Anxiety knew was their favorite tea, and with a long deep breath they looked up at their apprentice. 

 

“You refused to follow through with the plan yourself. So I took the actions that were necessary to enact it without you.” Ann swallowed past the lump in his throat. 

 

“ _ What _ did you do to me?” Another sigh, another regretful look that was probably fake. They weren’t even looking at him anymore. 

 

“The way you explained your powers made me realize that you don’t control the quantity of anxiety Thomas feels, you control the percent. And I decided if I couldn’t convince you to change the percent, I’d change the total. Ten percent of a hundred isn’t very much. But ten percent of a thousand is plenty.” 

 

“I… I thought I was  _ dying  _ Magnus.” For half a second, it almost seemed like the witch flinched at his words. But that was probably fake too. 

 

“I’m sorry Ann, I truly am. But this was necessary for your protection. I couldn’t let you anger Creativity, he would have simply shut you out entirely. The only way to get you in the videos was to go around him and that meant going straight to Thomas himself.”

 

“Bullshit.” 

 

“Ann-” 

 

“Bull. Shit.” They sighed, again.  _ God, was that all they could do? Sigh? Like this was all one big inconvenience?  _

 

“Storm Cloud, I know I hurt you and I know there’s nothing I can do to make that up to you, but please believe me when I say that I have your best interests at heart. I did this  _ for  _ you. To make you real. To make you stronger. I never would have killed you or put your life at risk, it was all a ruse.”

 

“Yeah  _ right _ . You don’t really care Mag, you never have. That’s not how our relationship started and it’s not how it works today. We’re here because we made deals that we are obligated to fulfill. This has never been an exchange of affection, it’s an exchange of power and information.”

 

“Oh come on Ann, we’ve been working together for  _ years.  _ Years! Surly you know as well as I do that that’s not true. Anxiety you are the closest friend I’ve ever had, I wouldn’t lie to you about something this serious. Look, this isn’t any different from when I woke up your magic all those years ago, it doesn’t have to be made into this big thing.” And with a start, Anxiety realized they were right.  _ This  _ was  _ just like when they woke up his magic.  _ For a second time now, Magnus had hurt him without warning under the guise of trying to help. Saying it was a necessary evil. Saying they had no choice. Saying they wouldn’t do it unless it was the only way.  _ And he actually believed them.  _ And he bought it when they gave him their name as a sign of faith. He bought it when they told him he was their friend. He bought into all of the little nicknames and the teasing and the late nights venting about how the other sides treat the two of them.  _ And all of it was a lie.  _

 

“Huh… guess I never thought of it like that.” The witch instantly smiled.

 

“See? I only did it because I had to, and I know it still isn’t right but we can work past this. A little time, a little payback, everything will go right back to-” He started laughing before they even finished their sentence. 

 

“No, no, I mean. You’re right. This is just like when you woke up my magic. You, once again, acted without my permission or consent. You  _ attacked _ me Magnus. Again. And I’m sorry but I don’t give third chances.” Mag’s faced turned from excited relief to horror in seconds. 

 

“W-wait Ann, I didn’t mean-”

 

“Save it. I don’t need nor want your excuses. You don’t care about me, you don’t care about Thomas. You care about power. And I’m done associating with you.” The witch was on their feet before he made it halfway out of the cave. Their voice filled with a completely different tone.

 

“What I said before is still true you know! He’ll kill you! When your time is up, he’ll see you for what you really are.” Anxiety whipped around, a new fire and fury in his eyes. He was tired, and frustrated, and hurt, and that reminder was all it took for him to snap.

 

“AND WHAT AM I MAGNUS?! HUH? WHAT EXACTLY AM I THAT HE WILL NOW SEE?!” Magnus stared back at him, startled at the sudden shift in emotion and energy. And for a moment he didn’t think they were going to answer him as they simply stood there holding eye contact. Then their shoulders relaxed and a soft smile spread across their face. In their witch form, with their magic quieted and their expression soft, they almost looked human. They didn’t stop looking into his eyes.

 

“Haven’t you figured it out, Storm Cloud? You’re gonna be just like me.” 

 

That was the last conversation Anxiety would have with Magnus for… awhile. He left the cave, still holding that stupid blanket around his shoulders as he trudged through the forest. For once his mind was blank. He moved with blurred movements and blurred vision. Before he even realized he had left, he was back in his inner room. The blanket was still wrapped around his shoulders. He went to sit down but a more accurate description would be that his legs gave out under him. He sat with his back pressed against the wood of his familiar door, and for the first time in a long time, he allowed himself to cry. 

 

* * *

 

December 8th, 2016 5:23 PM

The Dragonwitch sat at their desk with their head resting in the palm of their hand as they leaned on the desk in front of them. An illusion of themself stood in front of the desk throwing a bouncy ball at the wall and catching it, while an illusion of their dragon self sat asleep on top of the horde, effectively hiding both the back of the cave and the pile of bedding they still hadn’t moved. Their thoughts wandered to the events of that morning and with a sigh of defeat they moved their palm and let their head hit the desk below them. 

 

“Well I’d say this morning’s plan went  _ wonderfully _ .” The witch groaned at the voice of the intruder. They’d recognize that voice anywhere. 

 

“Fuck off Deceit.” The snake laughed and his voice became louder as it moved closer. 

 

“No, really, it went  _ perfectly.  _ Your lying skills are almost as good as mine.” The magic user wiggled their hand out from under themselves and held it out so their hand dangled just over the edge of the desk. When they snapped their fingers, Deceit’s hand was electrocuted just as he attempted to pick up one of their books.

 

“ _ Ah! Ow, ow,  _ ou-I mean that didn’t hurt at all! Nope, not at all surprising or painful,” Deceit said after actually yelping in pain, although Mag was pretty sure they heard him mutter something about bringing gloves next time. “Since when do you use lightning powers?” 

 

“It’s a trick I picked up from a friend of mine.” The snake scoffed.

 

“Oh right, because you have  _ so many  _ friends to talk to.” Mag picked their head up and grinned. 

 

“You’re talking to me aren’t you?” Deceit scowled and glared.

 

“No I’m not.” They matched his challenge with a smirk and a raised eyebrow.

 

“Oh? So you didn’t just say I’m the most wonderful witch who ever lived?”

 

“Yes, I totally said that!” They stared at each other for a moment, the witch smiling and the snake in horror. Then the Dragonwitch burst into laughter.  

 

“Shut up, it’s not funny! I mean it is funny! I mean-” But Magnus simply laughed harder at the side’s mistake. While Deceit was a vile nuisance, he was also a perfect distraction. 

 

“Deceit, you do realize that being the embodiment of lies doesn’t mean you have to lie constantly right? I mean, Anxiety isn’t a shaking mess all the time is he?” Deceit grumbled and glared at the ground.

 

“I knew that.” The witch snorted in amusement.

 

“Sure you did. Now, I appreciate the distraction, but what are you actually doing here Deceit?” The snake smirked as his mask slipped back into place.

 

“Oh, I just wanted to cheer you up after seeing your plan fail spectacularly.”

 

“Come on now, you didn’t seriously come here just to gloat did you? You must have some reason for wasting my time other than bragging.” 

 

“Well  _ fine…  _ I totally wasn’t curious as to why I heard the sound of crying coming from Anxiety’s room. And the knowledge that our little Annie has been sneaking into this realm in the middle of the night for years now definitely didn’t lead me to the conclusion that you absolutely had something to do with it. Especially considering that none of the other sides have ever actually succeeded in breaking him.” Mag groaned and dropped their head back onto the desk. 

 

“Shit, I actually made him cry? Dammit, now he’s never gonna join me.” Deceit raised an eyebrow and walked over to the front of the desk with a grin.

 

“Wait, you were actually trying to turn him? Like, you actually believed he would turn against the others? Because that is  _ totally _ an awesome idea that wasn’t destined to fail the moment it was put into action.” The Dragonwitch sat up and glared at the snake in front of them with a fire in their eyes. 

 

“It  _ was  _ going to work you moron! I was so damn close, I almost had him. If he weren’t so freaking stubborn I-” Deceit stared down at them with a hard look, his next words cutting off and shutting down theirs. 

 

“It was always going to work. Anxiety hates Thomas, he’d jump at the chance to hurt him. And while the Light Sides will always love him, he can’t help but to hate them in return.” The witch sighed and stared at their desk. They mentally translated Deceit’s words and scowled at the meaning behind them. 

 

“Hmpf, you sound like you’re speaking from experience.” The snake smirked, though there was no amusement in it. More a sassy disdain like he was getting angry just thinking about the memory. 

 

“Anxiety loves breaking the rules, and doesn’t worry about Thomas being punished for it. Or about Thomas’s friends abandoning him. After all, Anxiety has plenty of friends in the mindscape and never spends his time getting affection vicariously through Thomas’s eyes and memories with his friends.” The witch’s eyes widen a bit. They hadn’t thought of that. “ _ And _ that doesn’t cause any fights between us at all. He loves everything about me and what I do.” 

 

“So basically, the only reason he lets you do what you want is because at the end of the day your actions protect Thomas, to an extent.” 

 

“Nope. And, one more request, can you teach me how to do that lightning thing? It won’t at all help next time Annie and I get into another fight.” The witch laughed. 

 

“You sure about that? Last time you asked to learn a spell you messed up polymorph so badly that you permanently scarred half your face.” The snake scowled.

 

“I-... fine. But I won’t be back to ask again later.” The witch smirked and rested their head back into their hand. 

 

“Whatever you say, Snake Face.” Deceit grumpily turned and began walking out of the cave. 

 

“Careful Dragonwitch, Anxiety is more similar to you than you think.” And as Deceit vanished, Magnus realized with a start that for the first time, they couldn’t tell if he was lying. 


	16. Chapter 16

December 7th, 2016 12:04 AM

Thomas hummed to himself as he got up from the couch to get a midnight snack. He had been feeling slightly jittery all evening, and instead of sleeping he opted to re-watch the Office despite Logic’s loud complaints. He stood in the kitchen, glancing around and trying to make a decision. Slowly, he began to notice a strange nervous energy growing in his gut. He fidgeted a bit, thoughts stalling as he struggled to pinpoint the sensation. It didn’t make sense,  _ why was he nervous?  _ Then he noticed his breathing picking up, slightly at first, then faster. The hairs on the back of his neck stood up and his muscles went rigid. And just as he started to question what was happening, his silent mind exploded into questions.  _ What’s happening? What if he forgot to do something? This doesn’t make sense, why is he anxious? What if this is a magic thing gone wrong? What if something’s wrong with his sides? What if they’re dying? What’s wrong? Something’s wrong, something’s WRONG.  _ He was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn’t even notice himself sinking to the floor until he was sitting down. He wanted to call out for help, but he was breathing too fast and his mouth wouldn’t work. Was he dying?  _ Why did he think he was dying? He was fine.  _ He thought he was fine. Then the questions shifted until it felt like every anxious thought he ever had was hitting him.  _ What if his friends secretly hate him? What if he’s too clingy? What if he forgot to upload the video for later? What if he couldn’t come up with a good idea for the next video? What if this magic thing was bad? What if the sides were in danger? What if the sides endangered him? What if Logic’s right and the world is falling apart? What if he is hallucinating? What if he’s losing his mind? What if What if What ifwhatif-  _ He couldn’t keep up anymore. He sat on the kitchen floor curled in on himself and wondering when it would just  _ STOP.  _

 

And then it did. It was like whatever was causing the questions and the adrenaline just gave out. And he was just left hyperventilating on the tile, fighting to catch his breath. The adrenaline that had been activated by the attack wouldn’t be leaving anytime soon, but once he was sure he could he called out. 

 

“Morality! Logic! Creativity, h-help!” The moment each named was called, he was surrounded by the sides. Morality immediately dropped to the floor and pulled him into a tight hug, whispering comforting words and brushing tears out of Thomas’s face. He hadn’t even realized he was crying. 

 

“Where is it?! Where is the threat?!” Thomas glanced up to see the Prince standing above him, waving around a katana. 

 

“Calm down Creativity, Thomas is already panicked enough without your shouting.” Then Logic was crouching in front of him, a calculating look on his face as he reached out and took one of Thomas’s hands. “Thomas you appear to be disoriented due to lack of air, which was most likely caused by hyperventilating so I need you to focus on taking deep, slow breaths alright?” Thomas nodded, slowly trying to breathe normally as Morality continued to hold him from the side. It took a few moments for him to return to normal. Moments spent with Creativity tapping his foot in impatience, Morality softly running his hands through Thomas’s hair as calmingly as he can manage, and Logic simply staring and holding Thomas’s hand, his focus never wavering. 

 

“O-okay. I-I think… I think I’m okay now.” Thomas could still hear his heartbeat and feel the lingering fear of what just happened, but he could breathe and he could speak and he wasn’t going to just awkwardly sit here forever. 

 

“Are you sure kiddo? We don’t mind waiting a bit longer if you need more time.” Thomas turned his head up to look at Morality and felt a pang in his heart as he realized he wasn’t the only one who had been crying. 

 

“Oh Morality, did… did you guys feel that too?” Creativity whirled around, his katana still gripped tight in his hands. 

 

“Of course we felt it! Whatever  _ it  _ was. What we don’t know is what caused it.” Logic let go of Thomas’s hand and leaned back, putting more weight on his feet.

 

“Creativity is right. We are parts of you, and therefore feel what you feel. When the sensation began, our first impulse was to come to your aid immediately but something stopped us.” Thomas furrowed his eyebrows.

 

“Stopped you?” Morality nodded and held Thomas a little tighter. 

 

“Yeah kiddo, it was like we all just shut down. Kinda like you did. All we could feel was that fear, and we couldn’t do anything about it until it was already gone.” 

 

“Which is why we would appreciate it if you told us what you felt on your end, Thomas,” Logic said. Thomas gulped and tried to think about what he was doing before it happened, but it happened so fast and the thoughts were already fading. 

 

“Well, I had felt kind of weird all day and something was keeping me awake so i decided to get a quick snack or something. But when I got in the kitchen, I felt really nervous. Then it just started snowballing and suddenly I was really anxious and-”

 

“Anxious!” The others jumped at the Prince’s outburst. “Of course! I should have known it was the work of that fiend.” Thomas looked around at the others.

 

“What? What do you mean, what fiend?” The three sides awkwardly glanced at each other for a moment.

 

“W-well kiddo, Creativ- er,  _ we _ decided that it would be best not to tell you this considering Logic’s theory on how we became real, but I suppose there’s no point hiding it now.” 

 

“What, hiding what?”

 

“We aren’t the only sides you have, Thomas. The one Creativity is referring to is the side known as Anxiety,” Logic said as he stood up.

 

“Wait,  _ Anxiety?  _ Like, my anxiety is so great that I have a whole side for it?”

 

“Yes, and that emo nightmare has crossed a line this time, I shall go hunt for him myself!” And before the others could stop him, the fanciful side sank into the floor and disappeared. 

 

“Well, arguing with Anxiety should distract him long enough for us to get you settled and back to normal at least. Come on, I’m sure the floor isn’t a proper resting place,” Logic said as he held out a hand for Thomas.

 

“Oh, uh, r-right.” Thomas stood and then the two of them helped Morality off the floor. 

 

“Thanks for the help up kiddos, your old man isn’t as mobile and he used to be,” Morality said with a chuckle. 

 

“Still not my dad Morality.” Logic sighed.

 

“Don’t bother Thomas, you cannot convince him otherwise. Trust me. I’ve tried.” But the emotional side simply laughed at their comments and led the way to the couch where he sat and patted the seat next to him. Thomas, taking the invitation and having hung around the dad figure long enough, laid down on the couch and put his head in Morality’s lap. Meanwhile Logic sat at the end of the couch closest to the kitchen. 

 

“Thomas, I realize you are stressed and probably do not wish to relive what just happened, but the first step to fixing a problem is identifying it.” Thomas groaned and closed his eyes in response. Morality decided to speak up for him.

 

“Look Logic, I agree with you that we should discuss it, but I’m not sure there’s much we can discuss until Creativity talks to Anxiety.” 

 

“That’s actually what I wanted to point out, you see, looking at Thomas’s symptoms and the state we found him in I have deduced that what Thomas experienced was most likely an panic attack. The problem with this theory is that Thomas has never had a panic attack like this before. Yes, he struggles with anxiety as most humans do, and yes it has limited him in the past but it’s never disabled him like this.”

 

“Wait, that’s what a panic attack feels like?” Morality looked down as Thomas spoke, clearly surprised that he wanted to speak at all. 

 

“Well, since this has never happened before I only have stories from Talyn and the very small amount of research you’ve done on the subject in the past to base this theory on, but yes it appears that what you experienced was a panic attack.” Morality moved his hand to squeeze Thomas’s side comfortingly while Thomas tried to process the information. 

 

“Ugh, I banged on that villain’s door for ages, calling him out, and he still refuses to show his stupid face!” The three men jumped as Creativity popped up in his usual place. 

 

“We have the same face,” Logic said right as Morality asked,

 

“Anxiety isn’t answering?”

 

“No, padre, our chemical nightmare has refused to show his face, the coward.” Thomas frowned as the prince glared at the floor. 

 

“Is… is he really that bad?” 

 

“ _ No _ .”  “Yes!”

 

Creativity and Morality looked at each other as they spoke at the same time, but Logic cut in before the two could question each other.

 

“In the interest of avoiding a pointless argument, Anxiety is a problematic character but he is not as unmanageable as Creativity would like to paint him as. Creativity is simply biased because Anxiety messes with him the most. That is all we will say on the topic, because saying anything further would lead to an endless debate that Thomas does not have the energy nor knowledge needed to keep up with.” Morality and Creativity looked to the ground, mumbling agreements as they did. 

 

“Okay well, can… can I meet him?” The three sides’ eyes widened at the question.

 

“W-why would you want to meet  _ him, _ ” the prince said, the disgust clear in his voice. 

 

“Well, this is because of him, right? So, I want to hear his explanation.” 

 

“That,” Logic began slowly, “may not be as easy as you say Thomas.” Thomas sat up and looked at Logic quizzically. 

 

“What do you mean?” 

 

“Well, after we first appeared, Creativity and I conducted an experiment to see if we could summon each other. While doing this, we learned that we can summon each other but we could not summon Anxiety. We also discovered that we can ignore a summons by another side, but since Anxiety has never been summoned and ignoring a summons takes effort, it is unlikely that he would be able to ignore it.” Thomas pursed his lips together and took a moment to think it over. 

 

“So, what you’re saying is… Anxiety isn’t real? Or at least, not real in the way you guys are? Is that what Morality meant earlier when he said you didn’t tell me about Anxiety because of a theory you had?” 

 

“That’s right kiddo, we were worried that since Anxiety can be a bit… intense at times it would be best to avoid making him real.” Thomas nodded, and another silence fell. After a moment, Logic tried to speak up again.

 

“This is a lot of information Thomas, so it’s okay if you wish to-”

 

“How do I make him real?” The three sides tensed and looked at their creator in shock.

 

“Thomas, we just finished explaining how he’s dangerous and hurts you, why would you want him here?” Creativity said, but Thomas simply shot him a stern look.

 

“Ignoring a problem doesn’t make it go away Princy.” The Prince groaned and crossed his arms. 

 

“...Thomas has a point kiddo. I’m sure if we can just talk to Anxiety, he can explain what happened.” Thomas smiled at Morality, glad to have someone agree with him. 

 

“I suppose there can’t be anything wrong with wanting to pursue knowledge on the subject, so if that is what you wish to do Thomas, I will do my best to make it happen.” Creativity groaned as the others turned against him. 

 

“Oh come on guys, do we really have to? I hate that guy, I don’t want to have to make a video with him.” Thomas’s eyes widened.

 

“Wait, a video? Is that how you guys became real?” Logic nodded.

 

“Yes, that is the working theory at the moment. During the entire writing, filming, and editing process you continued to make jokes about us and mentioned us to yourself, however it was not until after the video was posted that we began to appear.” 

 

“Huh, okay yeah guess you’re right. So we just gotta make a video about Anxiety, that shouldn’t be too hard right?” Another groan from the Prince.

 

“Ughhhhh,  _ Fine.  _ Fine, we’ll breathe life into the Hollywood undread, and give him a stupid video. There, happy?” Morality grinned at the pun as Logic sighed.

 

“I suppose that’s the most enthusiasm we can expect from you, Thomas is this what you want?” Thomas nodded.

 

“Yes. I want to be able to know this part of me. If I don’t confront it, it’ll never get better.” A slow smirk grew on the fanciful side’s face.

 

“Hmm… confront you say? I think I may have an idea on how to fit our resident rain cloud into the Sander Sides.” 

 

* * *

 

December 8th, 2016 7:14 PM

Anxiety groaned as he woke up from his position on the floor. He hadn’t moved from his spot against his door since he fell there that morning. He had sat there for hours, eventually crying himself back to sleep. A decision he was now deeply regretting. He tried to drag himself to his feet, but his entire body ached in pain and he suddenly wondered just how badly Ma-... the Dragonwitch had hurt him. He leaned against the wall and let the blanket fall from his shoulders as he shuffled his way to his bathroom. Once inside, he slowly began to pull off his jacket and then his shirt and shivered when he noticed how badly both articles of clothing were ruined. It wasn’t until they were both on the ground that he allowed himself to look in the mirror. His breath caught in his throat. Bright red burn marks coated his arms, making it look like burning hot chains had been wrapped around them.  _ Which, they probably had.  _ There was a matching red mark on his chest near his right shoulder in the shape of a hand, like the witch had pushed him back against the gold with a flaming hand. On his stomach area there were light sword wounds that seemed to already be scabbed over in dried blood. He felt something still pressed to his back and turned to see that gauze and bandages covered the majority of his shoulders and lower back. And in the upper center of his back, between his shoulder blades, was the familiar mark of the deal he made with the Dragonwitch. The dark green rune sat untouched, still encircled by two rings of small lettering, spelling out the details of the arrangement in Witchen. 

 

He spent a few more minutes like that, just studying himself in the mirror assessing the damage until he felt too sick to continue. He didn’t dare remove the bandages, for fear of reopening whatever wounds lay underneath. Instead, he walked back into his bedroom and put on the biggest and comfiest long sleeve shirt he had and switched his usual skinny jeans for black lounge pants. He then collapsed into his bed as gently as he could manage. He knew he should check in on Thomas. He knew he should see what the other sides were up to. But he just couldn’t work up the motivation to move. He didn’t have the strength. So instead he curled up in his mountain of pillows and blankets and plushies and closed his eyes, allowing sleep to take him away from his painful reality. 


	17. Chapter 17

December 9th, 2016 9:30 AM

Anxiety was having what had to be the longest and most restful sleep he had had in years when a loud banging sound caused him to jump up and start flailing. A loud _thump_ could be heard as he fell straight to the floor, dragging his blanket with him.

 

“Kiddo, you alright in there?” The shadowy trait sat up despite the protest from his injuries and realized the banging had been Morality knocking on his door.

 

“Yeah Da- Morality I’m fine, I’ll be there in a second.” He scrambled to his feet as quickly as he could with the pain in his back and arms, and after double checking that the sleeves of his shirt fully covered his arms, he went over to the door and opened it a crack.

 

“Oh good, you answered! Creativity tried your door a few times and said you didn’t come out and I was starting to get a little worried you never would.” Anxiety opened the door a bit more, just enough to reveal himself but not enough to reveal the room behind him.

 

“Really? I must not have heard him.” The smile on Morality’s face flickered.

 

“He uh, he was pretty angry kiddo, I’m surprised you didn’t notice.” He tensed up.

 

“Angry? What happened?” Now the smile on the fatherly side’s face dropped completely.

 

“You… you don’t know?”

 

“Know what?” Morality sighed.

 

“Thomas had a panic attack a couple nights ago…” And just like that everything in Anxiety seemed to deflate. Any energy he managed to gain? Gone. Hope that Morality might have wanted to see him? _Gone._ That promise he made to not hurt Thomas? _Broken._ And try as he might have to keep his cold mask on, he was pretty sure Morality could clearly see the moment the light left his eyes.

 

“...oh… That was… that was an accident Morality. I didn’t think it actually reached him.” Morality’s eyes filled with concern and pity and all Ann wanted to do was crawl into a hole and _die_ because not only has he failed Thomas, he’s worried the purest being in the mindscape.

 

“An accident? What do you mean an accident, what happened?” Anxiety gulped. He had to put his mask back on, he couldn’t let Morality know. _No one could know._

 

“It’s nothing Morality, just a stupid miscalculation. Tell Princy to chill out, it won’t happen again.” He went to close his door, but Morality lunged forward and held it open.

 

“Wait! Anxiety are you alright? This accident… did it have something to do with our cookie nights?” That made the darker trait pause.

 

“Our what?” Morality fidgeted.

 

“You know, those random late nights where I find you in the kitchen and we make cookies until you calm down? I know we’ve never really talked about or acknowledged them before but… you always seem so shaken up when I find you and I can’t help but wonder if this is related. Panic attacks don’t happen for no reason.” Now it was Anxiety’s turn to fidget in discomfort. He knew what Morality was referring to, the events were very rare but they did happen. Sometimes Anxiety would get upset or have a panic attack, and he’d sneak downstairs to get some cookies or hot chocolate to cheer himself up. And sometimes, on those occasions, Morality would also be up for similar reasons and they would bake 3AM cookies. Morality never asked why Anxiety was upset and Anxiety never asked why Morality cared. It was just a silent agreement they made. But now that agreement was apparently broken and he didn’t know what to say.

 

“Morality… look don’t tell anyone I said this, or _else_ …” Anxiety gave a hard glare and waited until he saw a flicker of fear in Morality before continuing. “The truth is I do appreciate those nights and I appreciate you asking, it really helps but… this is something I have to deal with on my own ok? I know what I’m doing. Just… tell Princy I said it was an accident and if he asks for more information tell him I slammed the door in your face or something.” Anxiety could tell that Morality was disappointed in his answer, but at this point there wasn’t anything else he could say. He couldn’t tell the truth. _No one could know._ Besides, Morality was Thomas’s heart, all of his empathy and kindness. He was caring by default, so it’d make sense that he would be nice to Anxiety even if he didn’t like him. _Why would he think Morality actually cared about him?_

 

“B-but, but that’d be lying!” Anxiety smirked. As much as he hated it, this was a tie that needed to be cut before it strangled him.  _Like They did._

 

“Oh, well I can fix that.” And then he slammed the door in Morality’s face.

 

* * *

 

December 9th, 2016 9:30 AM

Creativity stood before the coffee table in Thomas’s living room, looking down on the notes mapped out below him. To his left was Logic, who sat on the couch showing what could only be described as intrigued indifference. And in front of him on the couch was the creator himself, attempting to read the writing and images upside down while the Princely side finished reading them over for errors.

 

“Alright Thomas, I think I’ve got most of it mapped out,” Creativity said as he turned the papers around to face Thomas. “This is everything we know about Anxiety. In order to bring him to life properly, you will need to master his villainous character and make a video that shows it off, without giving him too much power.” Thomas raised an eyebrow.

 

“Villainous character? Power? This seems a little extreme Princy. Plus, why is this even necessary? Can’t you just give me the ideas you have for the video directly, like you did for the other videos?” The Prince leaned back and groaned.

 

“Well, yeah I _could_ , but that takes all the fun out of the planning stage!”

 

“Actually,” Logic started, “there is another reason why this method of planning is necessary. You see Thomas, Creativity and Anxiety bicker quite frequently and it is very likely that this feud has left Creativity with a rather biased view of the darker side. This method of planning will allow Morality and I to proofread what Creativity is sending you, to guarantee that it is as accurate as possible.” Thomas glanced between the two sides present.

 

“So, wait, you mean I could get this wrong?” The logical side rolled his eyes.

 

“Well of course, you got us wrong at first.” Creativity gasped.

 

“Wha- Hey! I didn’t get us wrong Logic, I simply… livened things up a bit is all. Besides, the pilot episode is always the worst one, so it’s not like it _matters_.” Thomas’s eyes widened.

 

“Wait, wrong? How did I get you guys wrong?”

 

“Well, you didn’t really get us wrong per say, but there were a few things off kilter. For example, the biggest thing was that you portrayed me as less serious than I actually am. You were also very jittery in the video, which led to a few inconsistencies between the us you portrayed who we actually are.” Creativity pointed at Logic in defiance.

 

“Now hold on there, I was not the one to blame for the jitters, that was entirely anxiety’s fault! He kept messing us up cause he didn’t like that we were making a video about us.” Logic sighed.

 

“Oh calm down, there is no need to be dramatic, I never said it was your fault.” The prince hesitated.

 

“You didn’t?”

 

“No.”

 

“...oh.” Thomas gave both the sides a look.

 

“Are we done? Can- can we get back to discussing the video now?” Logic straightened up, as though refocusing himself.

 

“Yes, my apologies Thomas. I did not mean to start discourse, I was simply trying to answer your previous inquiry. Yes, you can get this wrong, but try not to worry. The three of us will do our best to walk you through it.”

 

“That’s right kiddo!” Everyone in the living room jumped as Morality rose up in his usual place. Once he recovered from the initial shock, Creativity grinned.

 

“Ah, Morality, perfect timing! Have you succeeded in your quest to retrieve the dreaded darkness from his cave?” Morality chuckled nervously and scratched at the back of his neck.

 

“Uh… kind of?” Creativity heard Logic speak up behind him, but he kept his eyes focused on the fatherly side.

 

“What do you mean kind of?” Morality shuffled his feet and looked at the ground before hesitantly answering.

 

“Well I mean, he answered the door at least. But I didn’t really get many answers from him. Or, I did but not the answer I was hoping for.” The Prince’s hands balled into fists and shook.

 

“Morality I swear if he hurt you-” But at that the fatherly side quickly looked up and held his hands out.

 

“No, no, no it was nothing like that. I just mean the conversation didn’t last very long. I… I think I woke him up? He was in what looked like Pjs when he opened the door and his voice sounded weird. It was actually kinda funny-”

 

“Morality, please, skip the story and tell us the facts.” At Logic’s harsh tone, the smile that had started to form on the dad’s face fell, and if Creativity hadn’t been thinking the same thing he might have felt a little bad. But the smile came back quickly, even if it seemed a little unsure.

 

“Right, sorry. So I asked him if he knew about what happened and he seemed really surprised? Like he wasn’t even aware it happened. Then he said it was an accident and not to worry about it.”

 

“What?!” The prince didn’t notice Morality flinch as he raised his voice. “That’s it? And you didn’t ask him for any more details, that’s all he said?”

 

“W-well I tried to ask for more details but he… slammed the door in my face.” The royal side huffed before turning back to the notes on the table. Then he turned his glare on Thomas.

 

“Still sure you wanna give this creep any power Thomas?”

 

“Wait, there’s one other thing!” Creativity saw Thomas look behind him to where Morality was still standing. The creator looked concerned yet thoughtful, a look Creativity wasn’t used to seeing and couldn’t quite place.

 

“Yes Morality? What is it?” It was a moment before Morality spoke again, but when he did the words were clear and precise.

 

“I think something’s wrong with Anxiety. He wasn’t acting like himself, he seemed scared and tired. The kiddo’s hiding something.” Creativity saw Logic stand up out of the corner of his eye.

“It appears that we now have even more of a reason to bring him to life then, if only to get to the bottom of what happened. Thomas, if you would please begin reading through Creativity’s notes? Morality and I will chime in and correct anything that is false, then we will begin work on the actual script.” Thomas nodded, a fiery determination now alight in his eyes. And that was how they spent the day. Fleshing out what little they knew of Anxiety’s personality, deciding on the costume and makeup, then discussing how they were going to make him his own video. The first part was filled with many comments such as _‘Creativity, that’s too harsh, he isn’t that bad’_ and ‘ _Creativity, please take this seriously. He isn’t one of your dragons to slay, he’s a side that we must now recreate. We can’t afford these silly exaggerations,’_ much to the Prince’s annoyance. He just wanted to get this over with, and he couldn’t see what the problem was. _Why couldn’t the others understand, that villain had to pay for hurting Thomas!_ It wasn’t until lunch time that the boys began working on the actual video.

 

“So Creativity, now that we’ve settled on Anxiety’s character, what are we doing for the video?” The Prince grinned down at Thomas, excitement completely returned.

 

“Weeellll… you’re visiting your friend Lilly soon right?”

 

* * *

 

December 9th, 2016 9:50 AM

Anxiety sat on his bed with a heavy feeling in his stomach. He knew slamming the door in Morality’s face was the right thing to do. He knew he had to keep up his dark persona to survive. _So why did he feel so bad about it?_ After a couple more moments just shifting around, trying to get rid of the feeling, he took a deep breath and pushed the thoughts aside. He still didn’t know what the other sides were doing and he _needed_ to check on Thomas. But at the same time… _what if Thomas wasn’t okay? What if he closed his eyes to see the other sides telling Thomas how terrible he was? What if Mag overdid it and Thomas was in trouble?_ It would be _all his fault_ and he wasn’t sure he could handle that. The _what if_ s stayed like that awhile, keeping him frozen and indecisive until eventually he realized that not knowing was far worse than knowing, regardless of how bad the situation was. So he took another deep, calculated yet shaky breath and then… he blinked. And suddenly he was staring up at Princy, who was giving a rather dramatic looking speech based on the speed that his lips were moving and the wild gestures his arms were making. The sound hadn’t kicked on yet, but Anxiety knew it would soon. In the meantime he focused on reading Creativity’s lips through the purple haze that was slowly starting to fade. He couldn’t quite make out everything, though he thought he caught the words ‘ _villainous’_ and ‘ _Video_ ’ later on, but he wasn’t quite sure. A couple more blinks caused the purple haze to fade until it was only at the edge of his vision and then the sound kicked on just in time for him to hear Logic speak.

 

“Creativity please try to focus. We are try to recreate him, not make him worse than he already is. I thought you were the one stressing that we didn’t want to give Anxiety any more power than he already has?” It took all of Anxiety’s strength not to fall apart right there. All of his thoughts and emotions were conflicting with each other and he could only go so long before they crashed. Then another voice spoke up, and he felt his- no, _Thomas’s_ mouth move.

 

“Yeah, Logic’s right. And besides, he can’t actually be that bad right?” Anxiety couldn’t help it went his heart swelled. He was created with the sole purpose of keeping Thomas safe, and while he didn’t (deserve) need Thomas’s approval, it was always appreciated. And honestly, this was the closest he’s ever gotten to reassurance that his creator didn’t hate him completely. So he foolishly let the warm feeling grow, until Creativity opened his mouth.

 

“Of course he’s that bad! He’s caused you to miss out on so many opportunities, so many social gatherings. Plus, why would he purposely be all dark and scary looking if he’s not a villain? You saw the drawings Logic and I sketched out, explain to me why he looks like that.” Anxiety flinched and then felt himself- _felt Thomas_ lean back and lift his arms in a comforting gesture.

 

“Whoa, relax. I was just saying…”

 

“Thomas wasn’t saying Anxiety isn’t bad, Creativity. He was simply stating that Anxiety isn’t as overwhelming or as bad as you think he is. He is an issue, yes, but not one too large for us to overcome.” And of course, _Logic to the rescue, hitting the nail on the coffin._ Anxiety really didn’t want to watch anymore, but he figured it’d be dangerous to check out early, especially after missing so much. _But then again…_ He wasn’t sure he wanted to hear Morality’s thoughts on things as well. And he figured he should get some rest considering he would probably be up all night going over the memories he’d missed.

 

So he waited a little longer, and then he blinked. The world went purple. He blinked again, and again, in the span of a second and then the last time he blinked he was back in his inner room, sitting on his bed. He looked around at the familiar room. At the stuffed animals, the pillows, the nest of blankets. The black dresser with the stolen makeup kit and his usual eyeliner on top. The mirror on top of the dresser that was almost always covered. At the soft, white fairy lights that circled the room. At the open door to the bathroom, which was lit up by the soft purple nightlight that he couldn’t see but knew was plugged in near the floor. And finally at the ever familiar yet ever changing purple streaked door to his room. But he didn’t look up. And he didn’t look down. He hadn’t since he first woke up, because he knew what he’d find. Looking down would show him the purple and black plaid blanket. _And looking up…_ He took a deep, shaky breath before curling into his nest of bedding. Laying on his side to avoid the obvious. For now there was nothing he could do, so he figured he might as well rest. He set an internal alarm for when Thomas fell asleep, and closed his eyes.

 

But once his eyes closed, all he could see was the image that he was trying to avoid. A gorgeous, swirling galaxy of stars tinted by nebula clouds of purple and blue and pink. He knew each and every constellation, every color, every spattering of stardust. It was the second spell Magnus ever taught him. His favorite spell, even to this day. A spell that he cast on his own ceiling the moment he could. And so, despite the pain in his heart, Anxiety fell asleep with stars both in and over his head.


	18. Chapter 18

December 10th, 2016 1:24 AM

Anxiety bolted up from bed with a gasp, his heart beat furiously in his chest and a ringing sound filled his ears. For a moment he just sat in his bed catching his breath. His internal alarm system went off just as planned, which meant that Thomas was finally asleep.  _ Time to get to work.  _

 

Anxiety got up, threw on his hoodie, and shifted into his outer room. Once there he collapsed on the couch and turned on the TV. Except, what appeared on the TV wasn’t a cartoon or show, instead what he saw was Thomas’s living room washed in a light purple filter. It was clearly in the morning and Thomas was pacing, muttering to himself about something. The time stamp in the corner of the TV read  _ December 8th, 9:04 AM _ , which was oddly early for Thomas. After another deep breath to collect himself, the vigilant side began fast forwarding through Thomas’s memories from the past several days. The images were washed in colors that shifted and combined based on what was happening in the memory. Dark blues, reds, light blues, yellows, greens, black, purple, and more all blending and fading and switching around. Anxiety sat and watched and waited, slowing down whenever his color appeared so he could properly process the relevant memory. It took longer than normal…  _ There was a lot of purple.  _ It was early in the morning when Anxiety finally caught up on everything. Well, it  _ felt _ like early morning. It was kind of hard to tell when Thomas was asleep. For a moment the unsteady side just sat there, counting his breaths and digesting everything that happened in the last few days. 

 

“So… they’re making a video about me,” He let his quiet murmurs fill the air in a deep exhale. Somehow, saying it out loud made the occasion feel more real, like the sound of his own voice shattering the silence was all it took to ground him. “They’re… making me real.”  _ … which means  _ **_they_ ** _ were right. _

 

* * *

 

December 19th, 2016 6:59 PM

“It’s been long enough, right? People will start finishing the video now?” Thomas glanced away from his laptop to see Creativity stop his pacing and bounce on his heels. 

 

“Creativity calm down, it’s been five minutes.” Logic didn’t look up from his book as he said this, but the attempt at indifference was ruined by the fact that Logic hadn’t turned a page of his book in at least half an hour.

 

“Yes, and in case you haven’t noticed Brainiac, the video is five minutes long! So Thomas, what are they saying, what are they saying?!” Morality laughed from his seat next to Thomas.

 

“Give them some time to process kiddo, not everyone watches the video immediately.” The fanciful side groaned and resumed pacing. Thomas decided not to comment on the obvious. They were  _ anxious _ , extremely so. It was so strong that even the other sides were affected by it, whether it was the pacing prince, the fidgeting dad, or the distracted teacher, they all felt it. They’ve been feeling it for over a week. But it wasn’t the presence of the darker trait that made them wary, it was actually his  _ lack  _ of presence. In the entire time they’d been working on the video, Anxiety hadn’t spoken a word to any of them. No complaints, no insults, no snide or sarcastic remarks. The only input they had from the star of the video was an increase in anxiety whenever Thomas or the sides did something that he clearly didn’t approve of. They knew he was watching, but still he never appeared. 

 

“I suppose… Creativity does have a point. The video is only five minutes long, it is possible that people have already begun discussing it.” 

 

“ _ Yeeeaaahhh _ , they are. But I wouldn’t look if I were you.” Everyone jumped as a new voice entered the room. Thomas’s head jerked towards the stairs, and sitting there in the same outfit Thomas had envisioned him in, was Anxiety with a nasty grin on his face. “Aww, what’s the matter boss, you almost don’t look happy to see me.” 

 

“I… Anxiety?” Thomas wasn’t sure what to do. His eyes glanced all over the room in a search for answers. Creativity had his katana out and pointed at the darker side. Logic was now standing and staring, clearly trying to process everything. Morality simply stayed seated on the couch, staring but not nearly as tense as the others. His attention was dragged back to the side on the stairs by a low chuckle.

 

“Of course, who else would I be?” Everything about him was just like the video, from his posture to the tone of his voice and all of it was sending chills down Thomas’s spine.

 

“H-How did you get here so quickly? It’s only been six or seven minutes at most,” Logic said as he stepped forward.

 

“Yeah, well, it’s a lot easier to show up when you’re expecting it. The nervous energy you guys have been radiating has basically given me a front row seat to the whole upload process.” Creativity narrowed his eyes.

 

“So you’ve been watching the whole time, huh? Good! Then you’ll know that we brought you here because you owe Thomas an explanation AND an apology, you  _ fiend! _ ” Anxiety rolled his eyes. 

 

“Except, you didn’t really bring me here Princy,” The darker trait sneered. He stood up and turned his gaze from Creativity to Thomas. “He did.” Thomas swallowed hard and slowly stood up in an effort to contradict how small he suddenly felt. 

 

“Uh, y-yeah, yeah I did.” Anxiety raised an eyebrow and smirked. Then he held his arms up and spun in a slow circle as he spoke. 

 

“Well here I am!” He held a sneer by the time he once again faced his creator, arms dropping and humor gone. “Now what do you want?” 

 

“I just told you he wants-” The Princy once again tried to intervene, but Anxiety immediately held up a hand and interrupted. 

 

“Ah ah ah, I wasn’t asking you, I was asking Thomas.” The sinister side’s eyes never left Thomas. 

 

“Right, uh, w-well as Creativity said, I want answers. For example, why did I have a panic attack?” Anxiety pursed his lips together for a moment, like he was pausing to choose his words carefully. It cracked the careless attitude he held and while Thomas didn’t notice it then, it was a detail that would bother him in the days after the confrontation. 

 

“I thought Morality would have told you already, but that… was an accident. It won’t happen again and none of you should concern yourselves with it.” Thomas frowned,  _ An accident? What kind of accident could he possibly mean?  _ Logic seemed equally puzzled.

 

“An accident? Anxiety a panic attack is not a matter of simple miscalculation, it takes effort. You can not expect us to just accept that as an answer.” Anxiety glared at Logic and sneered. 

 

“Oh and what would you know about causing panic attacks? Last I checked that was  _ my _ area. And besides, panic attacks are more emotion than thought and correct me if I’m wrong, but you suck at emotions. You wouldn’t be able to understand it even if I tried to explain it, which I’m not going to bother doing.” Thomas saw Logic flinch a little bit at the words, but he refused to take his eye completely off of Anxiety. 

 

“Well, if Logic won’t understand, tell me. You’re a part of me surely I could understand. Or Morality could, he’s literally emotions he’s probably the best at understanding them.” Anxiety groaned and rolled his eyes, and for a moment Thomas wondered if he should really be testing this guy’s patience. 

 

“Thomas is right  _ villain _ , you can’t just hurt him and then act like it never happened!” Another groan and now Anxiety was shifting his feet in obvious discomfort. A moment passed in silence and Thomas was about to open his mouth to make another remark when the darker trait let out a sigh. 

 

“It’s not that-” Before Anxiety could finish his sentence, he placed his hand over his mouth, effectively silencing himself. Creativity stiffed slightly at the action and Thomas could have sworn he heard a small gasp come from Morality, who still sat on the couch behind Thomas. But before he could question either of these things, Anxiety's hand was back at his side and Thomas was faced with a hard glare and a stern voice. 

 

“ _ Look _ , it’s not that big of a deal, alright? I know it was an overreaction and it won’t happen again. So stop asking about it and just leave me alone. If it was really that important, trust me,” Thomas felt the color drain from his face at the smirk that now sat on Anxiety’s face, “ **_you’d know_ ** _. _ ” 

 

And just like that, Anxiety was gone as suddenly as he had appeared.

 

“...Well at least we know it worked.” Thomas sighed at the Moral side’s comment and collapsed next to him on the couch. That entire interaction brought up far more questions than it did answers, and Thomas knew that sleeping would be twice as hard as usual for the next week or so. 

 

* * *

  
  


December 19th, 2016 7:16 PM

Anxiety stood with his back against his familiar door, safe and sound in the confines of his inner room. But he didn’t  _ feel  _ safe, and even if he did he wasn’t sure he  _ deserved _ safe. He felt disgusting after relying so heavily on lies and deception. He knew it would be difficult to hide the truth of what really happened, but he didn’t expect Thomas to be  _ so damn persistent.  _ Which some part of him knew was ridiculous, but he really didn’t care right now. So when he saw that none of them were letting up, he realized that the only way to get out of answering was to convince them that he couldn’t. He shivered as he remembered the shocked faces of his fellow sides when he put his hand over his mouth. Poor Thomas had been terribly confused by the whole thing, but every side knew what Deceit’s signature move looked like. Anxiety shivered,  _ stupid snake-faced jerk.  _ With his nerves settled, or as settled as they ever get, he finally walked away from the door and threw himself onto his bed.

 

He landed on his back and was left staring up at the shifting galaxy that made up his ceiling. Now that he was real,  _ oh god, he was  _ **_real_ ** _ ,  _ it was time to stop procrastinating and face the elephant in the room. He now had less than a year before the curse activated. Only now  _ They _ weren’t around to help him. He couldn’t risk stealing any more books.  _ What if They caught him?  _ He couldn’t ask Them for help.  _ What if they trick him? What if They hurt him again?  _ He couldn’t ask Logic for information.  _ What if Logic laughs at him? What if Logic calls him insane?  _ He couldn’t go to Morality.  _ What if Morality told the others? What if Morality stopped pretending to like him?  _ He definitely couldn’t go to Creativity.  _ What if Creativity killed him? What if Creativity locked him away for using magic?  _ He couldn’t go to the dark sides.  _ What if he tricks him again? What if they try to hurt the lighter sides again?  _ There was no one. No one he could ask. No one he could turn to for help. He pressed his palms against his eyes and hissed.  _ He couldn’t let this get to him. Thomas needed him.  _ And he needed more information. He’d been studying magic for years now and yet there was nothing anywhere about how to get out of this situation. The knowledge just wasn’t there. Which made sense, everything he knew came from Thomas’s subconscious and considering Thomas’s conscious mind knew nothing about magic or witches, didn’t even know to look for it, it made sense that Anxiety wasn’t able to find what he needed. But the only way to get more information was to ask someone in the real world but that was…  _ Wait.  _

 

Anxiety quickly sat up in bed and blinked. Thomas was still scrolling through social media and YouTube, looking at people’s reactions to the new video. Anxiety was curious about the fans’ reaction as well, but that wasn’t what he was focusing on right now. Thomas was still awake, and probably would be for awhile based on what time it was. But that was okay, Anxiety knew what he had to do now. It would be difficult, and risky, far riskier than he was comfortable with, but he didn’t have a choice. He had to get more information about this curse. For Thomas’s safety it had to be done, and that was all the motivation he needed. 

 

* * *

 

December 20th, 2016 4:24 AM

Anxiety stood in the center of his outer room, eyes closed and breathing steady in a way that was clearly counted and calculated. Everything in the mindscape was still and silent. Nothing moved and no sound was made. He was the only one awake and he knew it,  _ but he had to be sure of it.  _ He lifted his hands and checked once, then twice that he had everything he needed. His socks were on, making his footsteps silent. His headphones were around his neck. His notebook was tucked into a hidden pocket in his oversized jacket, along with a pen and a pencil with an extra eraser. The pre-written note was pressed inside the notebook on a page that was torn out ahead of time. The flash drive with a picture of the note on it was in the right front pocket of his jacket and he fiddled with it, his nerves destroying his faith in its object permanence. Everything was there, everything was thought of, every worst case scenario considered.  _ But what if it wasn’t?  _

 

It didn’t matter now, he had to move or he’d miss his window of opportunity. So with one last deep breath, Anxiety let the floor of his room swallow him. And then, with a blink of an eye, he was in the middle of Thomas’s living room. And there on the couch, plugged into the charger just like he had reminded Thomas to do earlier, was Thomas’s laptop. Anxiety glanced around, made sure Thomas was still asleep, then crept over the laptop. The very first thing he did once he was sitting on the floor with it was plug his headphone in to make sure it didn’t make a sound. Once that was done he set his headphones on so that they only covered one ear, that way he could listen out for signs of Thomas or any of the others. After double checking that it was safe, he slowly opened the laptop and turned it on. It lit up and loaded with no problems, allowing Anxiety in once he entered the password. He immediately opened a browser and typed in the URL for tumblr. He had wondered earlier the best way to get in touch with actual witches and figured that tumblr was just crazy enough to believe in that stuff. And the best way to find real witches and not people pretending to be witches was to ask for help in the actual witch language, but as Anxiety expected Witchen didn’t exactly have a keyboard. So he reached for the weight in his left jacket pocket and…  _ wait, his left pocket?  _

 

Hesitantly, Anxiety reached into his left pocket and his eyes widened when the light of the laptop showed him that the object in his hands was a phone. It was an iPhone with a white case that had black edges and when he turned it on the wallpaper showed a picture of a lightning storm.  _ What the fuck, where did he get a phone?  _ He turned it over in his hands a couple times, struggling to figure out where it came from. Then his eyes widened in realization. In the video yesterday, there was a scene where he had a phone just like this. He stared down at his hands in shock,  _ was that few seconds of footage really enough to give me a phone? Did it work?  _ It took a few minutes of messing around with it, but eventually Anxiety had a fully functioning phone hooked up to Thomas’s WiFi and a new password. Now all he had to do was finish downloading some apps and it would be perfect.  _ But would it last?  _ He looked up at the time on the laptop,  _ 4:53 AM _ , and figured he had enough time to start searching.

 

It only took a few minutes to create a new email account, and then a couple minutes more to create a tumblr profile.  _ Now came the hard part.  _ Anxiety reached into his right jacket pocket, only to find that the flash drive was gone. He felt his heartbeat pick up before sighing in defeat. His suspicions were correct,  _ the only things that were made real were the things Thomas or the fans believed to be real.  _ Having a phone made sense because the fans saw Anxiety with a phone in the video. Having headphones made sense because it fits Thomas’s view of Anxiety and probably the image a lot of fans were projecting on him. But there was no way Thomas or the fans would know about this flash drive, much less what was on it. Anxiety leaned back and drummed his fingers on the edge of the couch. _ There had to be a way to do this.  _ He lowered the laptop screen to look around the room and his eyes landed on something Thomas had left out on the coffee table.  _ Maybe he could make this work after all…  _


	19. Chapter 19

December 20th, 2016   5:06 AM

Anxiety read over what he had written again and again, _it had to be perfect._ It hadn’t taken long to rewrite the note using the journal Thomas had left out the night before, he just hoped Thomas wouldn’t notice the missing page after he ripped it out. Once he was certain the written note was correct, he took a picture of it with his new phone. Then he sat back on the couch, logged onto tumblr, and pulled up a blank text post. He leaned forward and drummed his fingers on the coffee table. There were so many risks to what he was about to do. So many ways it was wrong on so many levels. It went against every single instinct he had. _What if the post gets tracked back to Thomas? What if this puts him and the others in danger? What if this whole thing was a fabrication and the symbols are just gibberish? What if it doesn’t work? What if, what if, what if, what if,_ But he had to try anyway. Now that everything _They_ told him could’ve been a lie, he had to make sure this was safe for Thomas. And that meant getting an outside opinion. So with only slightly trembling fingers, Anxiety posted the picture of the note. The note he had written in painfully neat Witchen symbols. The note that he had written and rewritten in the mindscape far too many times.

 

‘ _To whoever can read this,_

_I have recently discovered that I am a witch, and have been using old books I found to teach myself about it. But the books only say so much, and my magic is starting to get out of control. The only people who could have told me anything are dead. I don’t want to do this, but I am getting desperate. ~~Please,~~ if anyone knows anything that could help me message me. I need all the help I can get.’ _

 

It felt weird, just begging for help from complete strangers, but it was something that needed to be done. So he posted it, and he waited. And waited. _And waited._ Which he expected, but it didn’t make the waiting any easier. It wasn’t until six in the morning that his phone vibrated with a response in his PM box.

 

**Puppet-Master91:** Delete the post.

**Puppet-Master91:** I’ll send you a link to the server, just please delete the post before anyone else sees it.

**Puppet-Master91:** I’m not trekking through code and hiking across the country to save some newbie’s ass cause they were stupid enough to get caught by hunters via tumblr post so you better hurry up.

 

**StormCloud:** Wait what? What do you mean hunters?!

 

**Puppet-Master91:** Oh for fucks sake DELETE THE FUCKING POST YOU MORON!

 

Anxiety flinched and quickly clicked out of the chat box to delete the post. _What was going on?_ He honestly didn’t expect a response at all, much less one this… _aggressive._

 

**StormCloud:** Okay it’s deleted, who tf are you? What do you mean server link? Wtf is going on?

 

Anxiety rapidly tapped his fingers against the table as he waited for a response. He glanced at the clock on his phone and shifted around in his seat. It was already six in the morning. He wasn’t sure what was happening, but whatever it was needed to happen fast. Sure, Thomas was far from a morning person and likely wouldn’t be up for another three hours _at least_ , but the sun was still rising soon. Soon it wouldn’t be safe. He was pulled from his thoughts by another message popping up. This time it was just a link. No explanation, no other words, just an unspoken request. _But what if it was a trap? What if this person is a hunter? What if they’re a hacker? What if this is a prank? What if-_

 

**Puppet-Master91:** Don’t have all day here buddy, do you want help or not?

 

Anxiety clicked the link. His phone opened up Safari and revealed a black and grey pop up with white Witchen lettering on it. It looked a bit like an invite to a Discord server and read, ‘ _Welcome! You’ve been invited to the private Chat server for Witches only! Please make an account or log in with a previously used account to begin.’_ Underneath the text were the usual log in or sign up buttons, written in the same language. With wide eyes and only slightly shaking fingers, Anxiety began making an account. It didn’t take long and didn’t even ask for a real name. Only Age, how long he had been using magic, username, password, email, and type of magic were required. He hesitated on the username, unsure if he wanted all witches to use the nickname _They_ had given him. But in the end he couldn’t come up with anything better. And besides, written under the username box was a message that showed him he really couldn’t pick anything else, ‘ _Hint: If you’re having trouble coming up with a username, most people pick something that shows what type of magic they have. It’s not required, but it’ll make finding others like you a little easier.’_ And with everything completed and double checked, Anxiety pressed _Enter Chatroom._ And suddenly he was looking at a chat log written in English.

 

Welcome new user **StormCloud** to the chatroom! 

 

**ForestQueen:** Oh hey! You must be the new person Puppet told me about!

 

**StormCloud:** uh, yeah. Guess so.

 

**Metamorphosis:** Sup.

 

**ThePuppeteer:** Took you long enough.

 

**ForestQueen:** Aw go easy on them Puppet, poor thing is probably confused. Based on the note you showed me, it sounds like they don’t really know anything about us at all.

 

**ThePuppeteer:** Oh they definitely don’t know anything. If I hadn’t swooped in when I did they probably would’ve ended up “disappearing” like all the others.

 

**Encoder:** Oh come on Puppet, those are just conspiracy theories and we all know it. The only Hunters left are the old radical groups who wouldn’t be able to work code if you shoved a hacking for dummies book in their face.  

 

**ForestQueen:** Yeah don’t mind her Storm, Puppet’s just grumpy cause she hasn’t had her coffee yet. ;)

 

**ThePuppeteer:** No one should be forced to go to work this early in the morning. No one.

 

**Fireball:** But Puppet, I thought you said you loved your job?

 

**ThePuppeteer:** I do. But I hate mornings even more.

 

**StormCloud:** Ummm, hate to interrupt but wtf is going on?

 

**Metamorphosis:** Wait, Puppet did you not tell them?

 

**StormCloud:** Tell me what?

 

**ForestQueen:** Puppet’s gotta go to work, so I’ll step in for now. Welcome Storm to the World Coven! It’s a group of encrypted online servers with rooms for both text and voice chat so witches around the world can keep in touch with and help each other! This is the American East Coast server, so let Encoder know if that’s a mistake. This is the general chat room, but there are a bunch of other ones for if you need to ask about something specific. Or you can message someone directly if you have any questions!

 

Before Anxiety could even fully process the paragraph he had just read, he heard a cabinet clang in the kitchen. Next thing he knew he was crouched in his inner room with his phone in one hand and the note crumpled up in the other. He held his breath and prayed that whoever had appeared in the kitchen had not seen him. That they wouldn’t notice the laptop he left open. After a few moments he glanced down at his phone to see it still open to the chatroom. Anxiety paused for a moment, unsure if it would even work, then he shakily typed out a response.

 

**StormCloud:** Okay cool. On the off chance that I’m not dreaming this up right now, that’s actually really cool. I’ve gotta go, I think one of the people I live with just woke up. I’ll check in later.

 

**ForestQueen:** Haha, okay! I know this is probably a lot so take all the time you need!

 

Anxiety took a moment to ponder the fact that _Thomas’s head had surprisingly good service and WiFi for some reason,_ and then decided that he had done enough work for the day and deserved a nap. After all, _working hard was not his thing._

 

* * *

 

December 24th, 2016 11:30 PM

After his nap, and in the days following Anxiety kept a close eye on the chatroom. He didn’t participate much at first, instead opting to observe the other witches to see how genuine they were. He had been contributing enough that he didn’t seem creepy of course, he couldn’t afford to get them suspicious, but any time one of them asked why he joined or any other personal questions he would dodge them anyway he could. Eventually they seemed to figure out that he didn’t trust him, and they quit pushing him for more than he was willing to give. The most important thing that he noticed is while there were technically a lot of users, only a few were online regularly. Those that were almost never on, only came online to ask a question about a spell or potion in the appropriate chat room before going offline again. And those that were online regularly seemed to be friends.

 

But in this moment, it would be officially Christmas in thirty minutes, and once again Anxiety found himself wide awake in the mound of pillows, plushies, and blankets that made up his bed. Which would be fine, normal even, considering it’s how he’s spent the majority of his Christmases it _should_ be normal except… _except it’s not how he’s spent Christmas for the last two years._ It seemed _They_ were still having an impact on him, whether he wanted Them to or not. He fidgeted in the bed, trying to bury himself under blankets and hugging a black cat plush to his chest. He tried focusing on the soft textures and the soft lights around the room and the music playing softly from his headphones. But he couldn’t stop thinking about how it was Christmas and how he was _alone, always alone._ All he could focus on was the bright starlight coming from the ceiling and the bright colors of the makeup kit on his dresser and the bright purple of the one blanket he couldn’t yet add to the bed but also couldn’t get rid of and the way the scars on his back and arms itched and ached. He squirmed and struggled and fought to keep away the panic and just _sleep_ but nothing changed. Nothing changed, until his phone started vibrating in his pocket. It vibrated once, then again, and after a bit of rearranging the blankets, he pulled it out and sat up in the bed with his back against the wall. It seemed there were still some witches that could distract him on the holidays.

 

General

 

**ForestQueen:** Merry Christmas!!!

 

**Metamorphosis:** Merry Christmas!

 

**Encoder:** Woo! X-mas!

 

**StormCloud:** Merry Christmas

 

**ThePuppeteer:** I was gonna point out that not everyone celebrates Christmas but then I remembered that a lot of “Christmas” traditions actually have pagan origins and we’re all witches. Soooo, Merry Christmas I guess.

 

**Fireball:** Guuuyysss satan wont come if your awake!!1!

 

**ThePuppeteer:** Fire you’re drunk, put the phone away.

 

**Fireball:** Gasp, how did you now im drunk?!1

 

Anxiety couldn’t help the soft chuckle that came out of his mouth, but quickly clapped a hand over it to avoid making any sound that could alert the others. Not that they could actually hear anything in his inner room but...

 

**Somniator:** Well first you said Satan instead of Santa, then you actually typed out gasp. Plus you’re in college, it’s kind of a given. Also, Merry Christmas everyone!

 

**Metamorphosis:** Wait, Fire I thought you said you were going home for the holidays?

 

**FireBall:** Yeahhh that was before I met mamas new boyfriend

 

**Encoder:** Yikes. Fire, I’m hacking into your phone and disconnecting you from the internet before you do something stupid, okay? Okay.

 

User **FireBall** is now offline

 

**ForestQueen:** Aww poor thing, no one should be alone on Christmas :(

 

Anxiety tensed up and bit his lip nervously.

 

**Encoder:** Well jeez Forest, don’t go throwing too much pity. I’m technically alone right now, doesn’t mean I’m sad about it. In fact, raise your metaphorical hand if you’re alone for Christmas.

 

**Somniator:** *Raises Hand*

 

Despite the initial worry, Anxiety felt himself relaxing at the amount of people who didn’t really have anyone.

 

**StormCloud:** raises hand

 

**ThePuppeteer:** Jesus, why so many loners? Are Forest and I really the only taken people on the server?

 

**Metamorphosis:** Hey, you didn’t see me raising my hand.

 

**Encoder:** I said alone Puppet, not single.

 

**ForestQueen:** Wait a minute… Storm didn’t you mention before that you live with people?

 

Anxiety stared at the phone for a moment in horror. _He messed up. Ohhhh god he messed up._

 

**ThePuppeteer:** Oh yeah, he did mention that didn’t he?

 

_Shit shit shit shit._

 

**Metamorphosis:**...Storm?

 

_What was he supposed to say? The truth? A lie?_

 

**Encoder:** Storm… you weren’t lying to us were you?

 

_Shit. Truth it is._

 

**StormCloud:** No! No, I wasn’t lying, sorry, it’s just…

 

**ThePuppeteer:** Just what?

 

**StormCloud:** Look, let’s just say the people I live with don’t really celebrate things with me and leave it at that.

 

For a moment, no messages entered the chat. Anxiety held his breath and prayed that they would just leave it alone. What would he say if they kept pushing? _Oh yeah, I’m alone because everyone I live with hates me, and one of them kind of almost killed me and the other has threatened to kill me?_ That actually sounded even worse when he strung the sentence together in his head. It was actually a full five minutes before anyone said anything and if Anxiety hadn’t been through what he had, he’d probably say it was the most agonizing five minutes of his life.

 

**ForestQueen:**...oh Storm :(

 

**Metamorphosis:** ouch.

 

**ThePuppeteer:** Okay that’s it, all of you people are pissing me off, Forest and I are officially adopting you loners.

 

**Encoder:** Dammit Pup I already said not single and not lonely. I am allowed to spend an evening by myself in peace and quiet without it being a sob story.

 

**Somniator:** Yeah Puppet, I get that you and Forest are like the cutest couple ever but that doesn’t mean all of us need that.

 

**ThePuppeteer:** THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT AND YOU KNOW IT.

 

Anxiety felt himself once again relax as the others continued to veer off track. The subject was skipped over and it looked like he was in the clear. _Or at least no one was willing to say it out loud if he wasn’t._ But for once he pushed aside the what ifs and simply enjoyed interacting and watching the group. None of the others would call it out for another two hours.

 

User **ForestQueen** has opened up a private text chat

 

**ForestQueen:** Storm, I realize you might not want to do this but I have two yes-or-no questions for you and I want them answered honestly, alright? I won’t tell the others unless you want me to, I promise, I just need to know.

 

Ann swallowed away the lump in his throat and the fear in his veins as he blurted out an answer.

 

**StormCloud:**...okay?

 

**ForestQueen:** First: _Are you in danger?_ Second: _Do you need one of us to come get you?_

 

The darker trait sat in his pile of fluff with no idea what to say. He just stared down at the two questions she had somehow typed in Witchen. He stared and stared and a million thoughts ran through his head, but they all started with one word. _Why? Why would she ask that? Why would she care? Why would she help? Why, why why, why-_ Then he realized it didn’t matter _why_ , what mattered was his answer. _What if he said yes? What if he said no? What if he was honest? What if he lied and she found out? What if she found out he was barely real? What if she came to help and ran when she found the truth? What if-_ Wait _Why did he want to say yes?_ He sat and he struggled and it wasn’t until his phone vibrated again that he realized he had been zoned out for far too long.

 

**ForestQueen:** Storm? I need an answer.

 

**StormCloud:** Okay, okay. First: ...not at the moment? Second: No.

 

**ForestQueen:** Not at the moment?! Does that mean you’re in danger sometimes? Are you sure you don’t need any of us to come?

 

**StormCloud:** Look, it’s complicated alright? I can’t leave right now and I can’t really explain right now. Maybe I will eventually, but right now I just… I can’t Forest.

**ForestQueen:** Alright. I guess I can accept that. Just promise me that you’ll tell us if you need help okay? There’s a lot of people who don’t take kindly to our kind, and I’d hate to see a newbie get hurt because he was too scared to reach out.

 

**StormCloud:**...okay Forest. I appreciate that. Merry Christmas.

 

**ForestQueen:** Merry Christmas Storm :)

 

Anxiety sighed and layed back down on the bed. He wasn’t sure how to react to the situation. He wasn’t really sure of much anymore. But he figured it wasn’t the worst Christmas he’d ever had.


	20. Chapter 20

January 1st, 2017   4:07 PM

“No, no, absolutely not.” Anxiety stood at what was now considered his usual place on the stairs, with three faces gazing at him with various levels of disappointment. Logic was also staring at him, but he actually seemed to be agreeing with the black clad side for once. 

 

“Oh come on, it isn’t that bad. You don’t even have that many lines!” Anxiety’s glare flickered to Creativity, fists curled and voice stern.

 

“I am  _ not. Singing.  _ Princy.” 

 

“Aw, please kiddo? It really isn’t that big of a deal, you could even pick the lines yourself!” Anxiety sighed and rubbed the sides of his temple. He could already feel his stomach churn with nerves and a stress headache that was steadily building. First, he spent the morning listening to the three light sides bicker with each other for hours. Then, when he finally couldn’t take it anymore, he tried to step in and distract them by pointing out how stupid the whole idea of resolutions were, which of course resulted in them yelling at him instead of each other.  _ At least they weren’t fighting anymore.  _ Finally, as if the couldn’t get any worse, Creativity had the  _ brilliant _ idea of turning their argument into a song for the internet to enjoy.  _ Like that was a thing people wanted.  _

 

“Actually, I’m afraid that I must once again agree with Anxiety. I have no interest in singing, and must therefore decline on your offer to join in.”  _ Thank the universe for Logic. _

 

“Oh for heaven’s sake, you too Logic! Why can’t you two see what a great idea this is!” Thomas quickly stepped forward to try and diffuse the situation. 

 

“Whoa, whoa, let’s calm down a minute. No one is saying your idea is bad Creativity-”

 

“I am.” Thomas sighed and tried again as the Prince shot Anxiety another dirty look.

 

“Ok, well, Anxiety doesn’t think it’s a good idea, but the rest of us aren’t. Logic is just saying he doesn’t want to sing. We can still do the video, I’ll just do all the parts myself.” The Prince groaned and whined, looking more like a child by the second. Anxiety almost forgot that this was the guy who could summon a sword at any moment.  _ Almost _ . 

 

“But it’s not the  _ same _ . Besides, I was really hoping we could try filming ourselves this time.” Logic sighed and straightened his glasses.  _ He’s nervous. He really doesn’t want to sing.  _

 

“We can do an improv based video later another time, Creativity. There is no reason to behave so childishly.” The Prince threw up his hand, then crossed his arms. A little pout formed on his face, but everyone knew this meant he had given up.

 

“Fine,  _ fine _ , whatever. If Debbie Downer and Books for brains don’t wanna join in on the fun, that’s fine by me.” Anxiety rolled his eyes to distract from the small sigh of relief he let out. 

 

“Great, guess I’ll go then, you guys have fun making fools of yourself.” And before the others could stop him, the sinister side vanished. 

 

“Well. That went well.” Morality decided to counteract Thomas’s frustrated tone with cheerful agreement.

 

“Yeah! We have a new, super cool video idea, and no one has to do anything they aren’t comfortable with. It’s  _ tea- _ riffic!” Logic sighed and pursed his lips at the tea bag that was now hanging off of Morality’s glasses. 

 

“Yes. Right. Well, as long as I am not required to participate, I will happily assist in any way I can. May I first suggest calling in some help, considering our time limit?” Thomas smiled and began pulling out his phone, already having someone in mind. 

  
  


* * *

 

January 3rd, 2017 8:26 PM

Anxiety sat on his outer room coffee table, three books spread out before him. One on advanced counterspells, one that had a brief page on magical contracts, and a book of spells he had yet to figure out. In his lap sat one of his notebooks, already half filled with translations, ideas, and possible spell modifications. He sat there criss cross, chewing on the end of his pencil, glancing between the books and his phone, which sat between two of the open spell books. None of his ideas had worked so far, and he was trying to decide whether or not it was time to ask for help.

 

General

 

**Metamorphosis:** Wait, seriously?! 

 

**Feistygal:** Yep! Totally turned it to dust. Right in front of my manager too :(

 

**PuppetMaster:** Christ, Gal. You need to get a better handle on that power of yours. 

 

**IcyBoi:** Oh she can handle it. After all, she handled it just fine when she dESTROYED MY GAMEBOY

 

**Feistygal:** Ah yes, the Gameboy that your froze solid and already broke. Such a tragedy. 

 

**ForestQueen:** Now, now you two, please don’t start another fight. 

 

**SalemBrew:** Forest is right, this bickering won’t fix what happened. 

 

**Icyboi:** Yeah, Feist, quit picking fights. 

 

User  **Icyboi** is offline

 

**Encoder:** Damn those bullheaded twins. 

 

User  **Feistygal** and  **Icyboi** have been temporarily kicked

 

**Wolverine:** Encoder, was that really necessary? You know those two are on the younger side. 

 

**Encoder:** For my own sanity, yes Doc, it was necessary. 

 

Anxiety looked over a page of the third book again, trying to make sense of it by translating individual words.  _ Maybe if he could find an invisibility spell, he could get more books from the cave?  _

 

**SalemBrew:** Wait, I thought Wolf was a veterinarian? 

 

_ No, it’s too risky. What if They had a counterspell to it? What if They had enough draconic powers or senses that They didn’t need to see him?  _

 

**Encoder:** Doc, vet, who cares he’s still a medical dude. 

 

_ Maybe the first book has a counter to curses?  _ The soft sound of rustling papers echoed in the eerily silent space. 

 

**Salembrew:** I’m not sure if that’s correct, but if Wolf doesn’t mind then I suppose it doesn’t matter. 

 

_ No, even if he finds a counter, it would break the deal. What if They find out? What if the moment he undoes the curse, They hunt down and kill them all?  _

 

**Wolverine:** I don’t mind at all! Just don’t ask me to actually give you medical attention haha

 

**PuppetMaster:** Nah, don’t worry. That’s what Forest is for. 

 

He focused on the soft scribbling sound as he crossed out ideas and wrote down new ones. The notebook was more scratches than words at this point.  _ Maybe there’s some sort of loop-hole he hasn’t noticed yet?  _

 

**Somniator:** Oh? I thought her impulse power was nature magic? 

 

**ForestQueen:** Oh it is, but a lot of the fundamental energy that goes into growing plants is very similar to the fundamentals of healing magic. It’s why the whole “druids are healers” stereotype exists. Cause it’s really easy for people with nature magic to do healing magic. 

 

_ No, the contract is short. The writing is too simple and broad. It covers too many bases, if there was a loop-hole he’d have noticed it by now.  _ He flipped through his notebook to find where he had written down the exact terms of the deal anyway. One more reading wouldn’t hurt, right? 

 

**ImStillHere:** Whoa, really? That’s so cool Forest!

 

**FireBall:** PRAISE THE GODS MY CLASSES ARE DONE FOR THE DAY

 

Warning! All caps messages are against rules, next offense results in banishment

 

**FireBall:** Whoops.

 

Anxiety glanced at the message and couldn’t help but smirk.  _ Maybe it was time to reach for help.  _

 

**Encoder:** rlly Fire? Again? 

 

**FireBall:** I’m soorryyyy, Code. I forget ok? 

 

_ But what if they don’t believe him? What if they find out he’s just a creation of someone else? What if they refuse to help? What if there’s no fixing it? What if- what if- whatif- _

 

User  **Metamorphosis** has opened up a private text chat

 

**Metamorphosis:** Hey Storm, you ok? You’ve been idling in the general chat for hours now, dead silent. Everything good?

 

Ann paused, biting his lip as he thought about their message. He and Meta hadn’t talked a lot since he joined, but other than Forest, they are the one he’s talked to the most.  _ Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to ask for help?  _ But instead of responding to them directly, Ann decided he’d just bite the bullet and test the waters. 

 

General

 

**Encoder:** whatever, just don’t do it again. I’m not inviting you a third time. 

 

**StormCloud:** Hey, what do you guys know about curses? 

 

**Metamorphosis:** What?! 

 

**PuppetMaster:** Ok, nope. Nope. Storm, I don’t know what you found, but you are wayyyy to beginner for curses so don’t even bother trying to cast them. 

 

**StormCloud:** Wait, what, why? 

 

Anxiety clutched his phone close, panicked that he had said something wrong or forbidden. 

 

**Somniator:** Storm, curses are really high level stuff. They are very complicated and easy to mess up. Not really something a newbie should attempt.

 

Anxiety stared down at the phone with furrowed brows. He remembered when They put the curse on him. It had taken a full three minutes of holding Their hand while the witch muttered under Their breath, but that was it. They made it look easy.  _ Was it really that hard? ...or were They just that powerful? _

 

**Encoder:** Why do you wanna use a curse anyway? Someone get on your bad side?

 

His chest felt tight as he realized what his message had implied. 

 

**StormCloud:** Oh, no no no, I wasn’t asking how to cast one or use one. I just saw some stuff in a book and wanted to know if they were really that bad to deal with. 

 

**HeirOfNight:** I mean, if you are asking how to break one then it depends on the curse. Part of what makes them so complicated is that they can be almost anything. The conditions are completely set by the caster, and the more complex the conditions the more difficult it is to cast. But, there is another catch. There must be a way to break it, but how it is broken is also part of the conditions set by the caster. 

 

**FireBall:** Wait, shit, they can be Anything? Like, anything at all? 

 

**Encoder:** I mean, it’s gotta be something the caster is capable of doing. But yeah, anything is possible. Sometimes a caster will even delay the effects so the curse takes magic from the caster gradually until enough magic is built up for it to be possible. 

 

_ Four years. He was given four years, oh god how powerful are They?  _

 

**StormCloud:** Huh, ok cool. I won’t mess with them then, thanks for the help. 

 

**Encoder:** uh huh  -_-

 

**StormCloud:** What? 

 

**Encoder:** You dropped that subject incredibly quick is all. We meant it when we said they’re dangerous. If you try to mess with curse casting before you’re experienced enough, the backlash could kill you.  

 

Anxiety didn’t realize the phone had slipped through his hands until he heard the thump of it hitting the table.  _ What if he had tried to counter spell it? What if he tried to undo it? Would that have killed him? What if They cast it wrong? Were they risking their life for this or were They just that confident? And why? Why? Why do something so dangerous?  _

 

He heard his phone buzz against the table as people continued to send messages, but he couldn’t bring himself to respond. He told them he joined the server because he didn’t know any witches. If he told them he was cursed, they’d know he lied. So for awhile he just sat and processed and tried to sort out  _ why.  _ But eventually, the notifications died down and so did his mind. He picked up his phone to see two messages standing above the rest. He knew he had to say something. So carefully, he made the best decision he could at the time. 

 

User  **Metamorphosis** has opened up a text chat

 

**Metamorphosis:** Storm? Storm please tell me you didn’t do something dangerous. 

 

**StormCloud:** No, I’m fine. Sorry, I saw the words “could kill you” and kinda had a panic attack. But I’m alright now, thanks. 

 

**Metamorphosis:** Oh thank gods. 

**Metamorphosis:** I mean, not great that you panicked, but at least you’re not like dying. And hey, I have anxiety too, so maybe we can trade tips and help each other now. 

 

**StormCloud:** Yeah, good idea. We can talk more later, I’ve got some stuff to process. 

 

Closing out that conversation, he opened one that was sent at almost the same time as Meta’s. The one he saved for last. The one he decided to answer honestly, because he needs to be honest with someone. 

 

User  **ForestQueen** has opened up a text chat

 

**ForestQueen:** Everyone’s kinda worried Storm. This doesn’t have anything to do with when you said you were in danger right? 

 

**StormCloud:** You can’t tell anyone what I’m about to tell you. 

 

**ForestQueen:** What, why?

 

**StormCloud:** Forest please. 

 

**ForestQueen:** … alright. What’s wrong? 

 

**StormCloud:** I’m cursed. And I have until December 13th to fix it or there’s a very good chance I’ll die. 

 

Anxiety hated how long it took her to respond. He hated how the fidgeted and tapped on the table and tore the corners of his notebook. He hated that it felt like an eternity when it was only five minutes. Most of all he hated that he regretted typing the message the moment it sent. Hated that he was trying to think of a spell that would undo it. 

 

**ForestQueen:** Give Puppet and I four days to dig up and research everything we have. Then we’ll call you and discuss how to fix this. Cause we can fix this, Storm. Everything’s gonna be fine. 

 

He hated that he tried to undo it, because that was the moment that set him on the path to fixing everything. Even if he didn’t know it yet.  


	21. Chapter 21

January 7th, 2017 8:13 PM

Anxiety paced his outer room nervously, checking over all his notes, all his books. Forest was supposed to call him any minute, and the anticipation had been slowly eating away at him all day. He was pretty sure he accidentally affected Thomas at some point, but none of the other sides said anything about it so it was probably fine. After another few moments of pacing and thinking, Anxiety jumped a foot in the air as his phone started ringing. He quickly pulled it out and swallowed thickly as he answered it. 

 

“Uh, hello? Forest?” He actually had to lean away from the phone when her excited response came. 

 

“Cloud! Hey! We’ve got all our notes in from of us, you ready to start?” The dark side carefully put the phone on speaker and set it on the table next to his notebook, then sat on the floor in front of it. 

 

“Yeah, yeah we can start now, uh-” Another voice cut in, a bit deeper and a bit harsher than Forest’s.

 

“Wait, stop, we aren’t seriously gonna call each other our online names this entire time are we?” Anxiety could hear his heartbeat pick up as the alarm set in. No one knew his real name, not even  _ Them _ .  _ What if they hate it? What if they make fun of him? It’s a weird name, what if they think he made it up? He couldn’t use Thomas though, what if they found out? What if-  _

 

“Oh yeah, good point Em. My name is actually Melody Pierce, but friends call me Mel for short.” Anxiety started pacing the room slightly faster than he was before, Forest-no-  _ Melody _ had given her name, now he had to give his whether he wanted to or not.  _ That was how normal interactions worked, right? _ Introductions went two ways. 

 

“And I’m her wife, Emlyn. Can’t believe none of us mentioned names before now. Seems kinda dumb.” The lightning witch barely heard as Melody laughed and said something in response to Emlyn. He was out of time.  _ Now or never, better do it quick.  _

 

“My… my name is Virgil.” He hated how quiet he sounded, how quickly the words spilled out. He stood still and waited for the words to come. Words that would carry confusion at best or insults at worse. 

 

“Oh, like the poet?” The last thing he expected was Emlyn’s immediate understanding and excitement. 

 

“Poet? I thought Virgil was the name of that guy in Dante’s Inferno?” Virgil coughed out of his stunned silence just in time to answer Mel’s question before Emlyn. 

 

“It’s, uh, both actually. There’s the poet, then there’s the uh, the uh character. There’s a couple others too, but those are the main ones.” Anxiety cringed at how uncertain he sounded. How uncool he sounded.  _ He sounded like a- _

 

“That’s so cool! You’ll have to show me some of his poems later, Em. I wish my name was unique like that.”  _ Wait, it’s actually cool???  _ He could hear Emlyn scoff through the phone speakers. 

 

“Oh please, your name is plenty cool Mel. It doesn’t have to be unique to be cool.” 

 

“I know that! But it’s still nice to have a name that’s unique.” Ok, this was enough praise for now, Anxiety wasn’t sure how much more he could take. He felt like his world had once again been pushed over, but he couldn’t afford to focus on that right then. 

 

“Um, weren’t we supposed to be discussing my uh, problem?” Melody gasped and he even without her making a sound, he could picture Puppet affectionately rolling her eyes. 

 

“Right! Sorry, sorry, didn’t mean to get us off track. First things first, is it a death curse?” Virgil paused and blinked, before remembering that he hadn’t really used the best wording four days ago. 

 

“Ah, no, sorry. I probably should’ve worded that better.” Anxiety nearly jumped out of his skin at the loud response he got. 

 

“What?!” 

“Hah! Sorry Mel, but you owe me twenty bucks for that.” 

“Awww dang it.” He sputtered for a moment before he realized their implications. 

 

“Wait, you guys bet on whether or not I was cursed to die?!” Melody’s embarrassed ‘ _ Welllll’  _ was cut off by her wife’s loud, unashamed laughter. Part of Anxiety wanted to be upset, or embarrassed, or annoyed by the fact that they had casually put money on how he would die. But the other part of him couldn’t ignore the warm feeling in his chest as he took in the fact that they were laughing  _ with  _ him, not at him. That they were friends. That they felt comfortable enough to joke around with him, without restraint or fear. And Virgil couldn’t help the small smile that grew on his face as Emlyn continued laughing in the background. 

 

“Don’t-hah-don’t take it personally Stormy, we place bets on, like, everything.” Until Puppet said  _ that nickname _ and he felt his breath hitch and his chest get tight. He paused and tried to swallow back his fear. He had gotten used to StormCloud. He had gotten used to Storm and Cloud and even the occasional ‘ _ Hey Weatherman’  _ because he  _ liked _ those. He was proud of those nicknames and the affection that they were always said with. But not Stormy. Stormy was what  _ They  _ called him when They were taunting him. When They were trying to aggravate him or distract him or get him to stop asking about something. Stormy was what They said to sound demeaning. Stormy wasn’t used to make him sound like a witch, or a friend, or a student. Stormy was used to make him sound like a child. And Anxiety  _ refused _ to be called that.  _ Refused _ to think about those memories. Refused to let her sound like Them. At least, refusal is what he would have liked to come out of his mouth. 

 

“Don’t… please don’t call me that.” The two women on the phone immediately went quiet when they heard the quiet,  _ broken,  _ plea come through the phone no louder than a whisper. Virgil hadn’t noticed how tight his throat felt until he tried to speak and he regretted how much of himself he let slip through. 

 

“Virgil.  _ How did you get cursed? _ ” But maybe Melody’s voice, speaking with a firm seriousness, different from any tone anyone had used towards him before, could convince him to stop regretting himself so much. So with a deep breath, he let his words slip into the familiar patterns of Witchen and he started from the beginning. With slightly less lying. 

 

“ _I lied to you Puppet. In my note, I said I didn’t know any witches. That I learned everything from books. And while I have learned a lot from old books, I learned more from… from one witch in particular._ _They- They aren’t liked by most of the people here. The people I live with._ ” Virgil paused, trying to decide how he could phrase this without letting slip that he wasn’t really a person. And as he paused, Emlyn took the opportunity to chime in with a concerning question. 

 

“Dude, what the fuck is your accent?” 

“Don’t be rude Emy, let him tell his story!” But Virgil was already furrowing his eyebrows in confusion. 

“Wait, what do you mean accent?” There was a slight pause before Melody decided to elaborate on her wife’s comment.

 

“Well, when you speak  _ Witchen _ you have an accent. And that’s not that weird among witches, you’re always gonna hear different tones in different areas. That’s just how language works. But you… Virgil there were a couple words in there that I didn’t recognize at all.” Anxiety tensed as he realized what this could mean. But instead of panicking, he asked for clarification and prayed he was wrong. 

 

“What words?”  _ Please let him be wrong  _ was the thought that ran through his head as the Puppet proved him right.

 

“ _ Witches, witch,  _ and the word  _ old.  _ What do those three words mean?”  _ God, did he hate being right.  _ Those were words that could mean the difference between being trained by a witch and being trained by a Dragonwitch. Which meant now he also had to explain that. Virgil let out a long, tired sigh. He explained what the words meant and then he cut off their confused and curious reactions with a blunt question. 

 

“Have either of you heard of a Dragonwitch?” A blunt question answered with a long silence. Then a hesitant answer. 

 

“Kid… Dragon witches don’t exist. Not anymore. They went extinct years ago, legends say the last one died some point not long after the medieval period. There were rumors of some in Japan lasting a few decades longer but no one really knows if that’s true. Any dragon blood left is far too faint to have any effect on someone’s magic or abilities.” Anxiety couldn’t help the cruel, spiteful thought that flashed through his head that,  _ boy these fuckers are in for a hell of a surprise.  _

 

“Well. Consider them not extinct. My accent comes from the fact that my mentor is-was a dragonwitch. And They did not like the people I live with. And the people I lived with do not like them.” And before the two on the phone could voice their shock and concerns and doubts, Virgil kept going. And he told them his story. He told them about the day one of his roomates with came home yelling about how the witch had attacked them. He told them about how he snuck off to the witch’s home and was tricked into making a deal with them. About how he learned he actually had magic blood. He told them about having his magic forcibly woken up, then being forced to accept magic lessons from them so said magic wouldn’t hurt anyone. He told them how he would sneak out every other night for lessons, how he feared every day that the people around him would one day find out and turn on him just as they had turned on Them. And maybe he left out a few details. Maybe he left out the part about Them being his only friend in the world. Maybe he didn’t mention the joking around. Maybe he didn’t mention the teasing and the nights he spent asleep on their spare blankets because he forgot to go home. Maybe he didn’t mention the part about Them being kind to him when no one else was. Maybe it was because he was ashamed for befriending someone who destroyed villages of people for fun. Maybe it was because he didn’t want to admit it. Or maybe he didn’t say it because he wanted to pretend it never happened. Maybe he didn’t want to say it, because maybe he missed it. Whatever the reason, he didn’t mention that Their name was Magnus. He only told them about the Dragonwitch.  

 

“Jesus Christ, Storm Cloud. You could’ve told us you were being freaking abused.” 

 

“Hey, come on Puppet, I wasn’t being abused!” 

 

“Emotional manipulation, viewing you as a possession, and physically hurting you regardless of the reasoning was abuse Virgil. And don’t say they didn’t view you as a possession, I’ve studied dragons Virgil and they would collect anything they saw as valuable. That includes people.” Virgil couldn’t come up with a response to that.

 

“I didn’t know you studied dragons Em.”

“They’re giant fire breathing badasses, fuck yeah I studied them.” Anxiety sighed and rubbed his temples. He’d never talked about all of this before and while a large part of him felt exhausted by it all, another felt strangely… relieved? He was pretty sure that was the word for it. 

 

“Ok, now that the traumatic backstory bullshit has been sorted out, what was the deal? Cause you still haven’t explained that.” Right, Anxiety almost forgot that that was the reason they were talking at all. 

 

“It’s important that you use exact wording Storm, or we might miss a loophole.” Anxiety took a slow, deep breath and then the details spilled out. Lies wrapped themselves in truth and Virgil was only a little bit concerned with how easy it was. 

 

“So, you know how I mentioned my, uh, roommates don’t like the dragonwitch very much? Well there’s only one that actually believes in witches and magic and supernatural stuff. And that one in particular is the one who really, really hates the dragonwitch and believes that they are a witch. And he kinda hates me and thinks I’m horrible and isn’t really that… nice about it.”

 

“Is that what you meant, when you said the people you live with don’t celebrate with you?” Anxiety hated the sorrow and pity in her voice. He was determined to make it fade.

 

“I mean, it’s not that bad, he’s never actually gotten, like, physical about it or anything. But the dragonwitch knows about him and knew about how much he hates me. The curse is that  _ in four years after making the deal I will transform into the monster he always views me as. _ ” There was silence for a few moments as the two women processed the implications. 

 

“So… your deadline in December 13th. Do you have any idea what kind of monster you’re gonna be turned into? Cause ‘the monster he sees you as’ is kinda vague.” 

 

“Well, I didn’t realize it at the time, but based one a couple conversations, I have a feeling it’s gonna be something rather… draconic.” He could hear the sharp inhale of shock and understanding from Puppet. 

 

“And if you start sprouting wings and breathing fire in the middle of your home, I have a feeling that asshole you were just mentioning is gonna start getting physical… isn’t he?” Virgil bit his lip and tugged on his sleeves to stop his hands from shaking. 

 

“But, surely they mentioned a way to break it? Every curse has a breakpoint, there can’t not be one. A quick read of the contract, or even the curse markings, would give you at least an idea of how to break it.” Anxiety could hear the fear and panic in Melody’s voice and it was almost worse than the pity. But it didn’t surprise him. Every witch’s biggest fear was being discovered by an outsider. It was a basic self-preservation instinct that tied every witch together. An unspoken truth. 

 

“There is. A way to break it I mean. But there’s no way it’ll happen.”

 

“What, why? You can’t just ignore your best chance before you’ve even tried to-”

 

“The asshole has to last the entire month leading up to the day of the deadline without insulting or lashing out at me. I can’t avoid him or it doesn’t count, and no amount of apologies from him will undo anything. One negative comment, one expression of dislike, and my fate it sealed.” Once again, the room was filled with a tense silence. The implications of what he said were horrible, and he knew it. But he couldn’t lie, not about this. 

 

“Virgil, how quickly can you pack your bags?”

 

“I’m not leaving Emlyn.”

 

“Why not? We’ve got room in our house, our property is huge with plenty of forest area. You won’t even have to worry about free loading, we can just fire our current nanny and your pay can be a home and food. Even if you weren’t possibly turning into a fucking dragon, you’ve gotta admit your roommates are shit, come on babe, back me up here.”

 

“Em’s right Virge, that place isn’t-”

 

“ **I can’t** ” Virgil immediately slapped a hand over his mouth. He hadn’t even realized how anxious he was getting. How angry he was. How scared. How outraged. He couldn’t believe he just used that voice with them, what were they going to say? But he couldn’t leave Thomas. He couldn’t, he  _ refused.  _

 

“Why not?” Puppet’s stern voice brought him back to reality. Melody still seemed to be stunned into silence, but Puppet sounded like she knew what that voice meant. And the relief he felt when she didn’t draw attention to it was indescribable. 

 

“I can’t leave him.” But Anxiety couldn’t tell them the truth. Not yet. 

 

“Him?”

 

“I said roommates plural, didn’t I? Not all of them are shit. Just most of them. And I can’t leave him.” Puppet sighed knowingly. She sounded like she knew what he meant without him even saying it, even if there was no way she could. Maybe she was thinking of a different situation, she already thought he was being abused. 

 

“Okay.”

 

“Okay?! Em, we can’t just let him-”

 

“We don’t know the full story Mel. If Virgil thinks it isn’t safe to leave yet, then we’ll just have to trust him. But Virgil, you  _ are  _ leaving. It doesn’t have to be now, it doesn’t even have to be soon. We have months to think of a plan. But you are leaving that place and you are leaving those assholes in the dust. Do you understand?” Anxiety felt his blood run cold. He didn’t understand. He didn’t understand why they were being so nice. He didn’t understand why they wanted him. Why they wanted his problems. Why they wanted his fear.  _ Didn’t they understand that taking him in would bring danger to their home? Didn’t they understand he was trouble? A monster in the making?  _ But maybe he didn’t need to understand. Not right now at least. Right now he just needed friends.

 

“Okay. I understand.”

 

“Good. Now, in the meantime, I want you to try being as nice to Mr. Asshole as much as possible.”

 

“Wait what? Why?” Virgil was too confused by the request to laugh at the nickname Emlyn had now given Creativity. Virgil hoped the nickname didn’t last. ~~It did~~

 

“Because the only way to break the curse is to last a month without him insulting you. So, for one month, try being nice to him. If he stops being mean, then we have a chance. If he keeps being mean and insulting you then he’s an asshole and a dead end so we should just ditch that idea all together.” Anxiety hated that she had a point. Hated that this might damage his act. Hated that this might make him vulnerable. But Emlyn had a point, and this was a good idea. 

 

“Alright. Alright I’ll try to be nice.”

 

“Good. In the meantime, Melody and I will look into other ways of breaking curses. Anything else you wanna add Mel?” There was a brief pause and it brought attention to the fact that Forest hadn’t spoken in a while.

 

“No, I think I’ll leave this to you Em. It’s more your area of expertise anyway.”  _ Area of expertise? What did that mean? _

 

“Great. Then we have a plan. You should get some sleep Cloud, it’s getting late.” Virgil looked at the time on his phone and was reminded that normal people viewed any time after 10 as late. 

 

“Right. Right, I’ll um, I’ll talk to you guys later. Thank you.” 

 

“It’s no trouble Storm. Goodnight!”

“Night kid.”

 

“Goodnight.” And with that, the girls hung up. And Virgil spent the next two hours laying on the ground wondering what he had just done. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay Lovelies! This is the last of the pre-written chapters. You are now all caught up on everything I have posted on my tumblr. Yay! Except not yay for you guys because this means y'all will have to wait for a new chapter like everyone else. My current goal is to post at least one chapter every month. This chapter was October's and the rest of the month is very busy so don't expect a new one until November. But maybe I'll have time to post a bunch of chapters November. Who knows! My point is don't expect a regular schedule but don't expect an eternity between chapters either. If you have any questions, theories, constructive criticism, praise, or just want to get to know me better, feel free to leave a comment or leave a message or an ask on my tumblr page @Mumblings-of-a-dreamer. I think that's it for now Lovelies, see you next month! <3


	22. Chapter 22

January 8th, 2017 9:14 AM

“Creativity, I’ve already told you why this isn’t going to work.” Thomas sighed as Morality and Logic once again turned down Creativity’s idea. The Prince wanted to have an improv episode where two sides would discuss a topic while Thomas stood in as mediator. They even had three cameras set up in what had become their usual places. Logic had initially agreed that it was a good way to get a video out quickly, but shot it down when the Prince announced the topic of the video. “We all like Disney Creativity, so there is nothing to debate. The video wouldn’t have any conflict or purpose, it’d just be you, Thomas, and Morality rambling about how much you enjoy Disney created media.” 

 

“But Logic, it’ll be fun! And it’ll be good improv practice at the same time, it’s perfect!” Logic calmly glared at the princely side and crossed his arms.

 

“It’s an invitation for chaos, and I won’t be a part of it unless you can prove to me that you will include a conflict and a plot.” Thomas was about to jump to Creativity’s defense,  _ he’s been meaning to make a Disney video for awhile,  _ when suddenly another voice beat him to it.

 

“Did someone say conflict?” Everyone jumped slightly at the new appearance on the stairs. Logic was the first to compose himself, though Thomas swears he saw him jump as well.

 

“Ah, Anxiety. I was just explaining to Creativity why his idea for a Disney video wouldn’t work.” Anxiety hummed for a moment, pressing his lips together as he thought about something.

 

“Well Specs, if you can’t keep up with the idiot's rambling you could always just leave. It’s not like the fans will miss you.” Morality looked like he was about to jump in to contradict the statement, but the damage was already done. 

 

“I can keep up with it just fine! But understanding his words does not automatically make them adequate.” Logic’s glare quickly turned to the darker side. His fury seemed to be doubled by the fact that the only other check to Creativity’s ideas was turning against him. 

 

“You sure? Cause it sounds like you’re just not a fast enough talker to keep up with him, which considering his IQ, is saying a lot.” Both left brainers ignored the Prince’s cry of dismay at the insult. “So, if you don’t think you can handle the challenge, why don’t you just run away to that library of yours and think of something better.” This time it was Thomas who tried to step in, already realizing what was about to happen, but even he was too late. 

 

“Fine! I didn’t want to deal with these nonsensical fantasies anyway!” Morality pouted as the Logical side lowered out of view. 

 

“Aww, kiddo, now look what you did. He was just trying to help! Here, I’ll go make sure he’s ok.” And then there were three.

 

“Ugh, now see what you did you villain, I was trying to get them to do the video! Now it’ll take forever to get them back here.” The Creative side scowled and glared and Thomas was about to do damage control when,

 

“Why don’t you just put me in the video? We argue all the time, it’s not like it’ll be hard.” Thomas and Creativity froze, shared a look of confusion, then turned back to the darker side.

 

“Wait, really? Anxiety, I thought you hated being filmed.” Anxiety rolled his eyes like somehow Thomas was the one being weird and stupid and an idiot and-  _ wow having Anxiety in the room really messed him up.  _

 

“No, I hate singing and being forced to do something stupid. This video would just be me doing what Princey and I do all the time. So, sure, I’ll be in the improv video or whatever.” Creativity narrowed his eyes at Anxiety.

 

“Can you even be in it? The topic is Disney, doesn’t that contradict your whole edgy, emo aesthetic?” The edgy emo in question smirked and met the Prince’s challenge head on.

 

“Oh, you’d be surprised. And I mean, we’re all pieces of Thomas aren’t we? We have the same memories. This’ll be a piece of cake.” The Creative side was still glaring, but Thomas could tell that the hesitance and animosity had shifted to excitement. 

 

“Alright then! You two go away, I’ll turn on the cameras, and you can interrupt whenever you feel like it. Let’s make a video!” The Prince went down grinning, but Thomas locked eyes with the Anxious one just as he was leaving, and for a second the side almost looked…  _ nervous? No that couldn’t be it.  _ Thomas pushed the sight away and smiled as he turned on the cameras. 

 

* * *

 

January 9th, 2017 6:34 PM

“Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid!” 

 

Anxiety tugged on his hair and paced his room, the video paused on his laptop.  _ Of course _ Creativity still hated him. Still felt the need to insult him after it had only been two days of relative kindness. And the rational part of Anxiety knew this, knew it would take longer to see results. But he couldn’t shake the feeling of  _ what if this was wrong? What if it didn’t matter how nice he was? What if this didn’t work? What if, by letting his guard down, he’s given one of the others something to use against him? He looks so weak in this video, he looks like an idiot! Of course Creativity was insulting him, why would he be quoting Mary Poppins again? What if he’s been complaining about Anxiety even more than Ann thought? What if, even if it seems like the curse will be broken, it won’t actually break because Creativity was still insulting him, just not to his face? What if- What if- What if-  _

 

“Ugh, stupid, idiot, moron, how did I miss that? How did I not notice he was still being a dick, god, I’m such a weak, stupid,  _ useless-”  _ Anxiety’s self deprecating tangent came to a screeching halt when three, calculated, familiar knocks hit his door. He immediately froze up, slapping his hand over his mouth. He had just a moment to think,  _ oh god what if he heard me talking to myself,  _ before remembering that his rooms were sound proof. It took a couple moments of hesitation and confusion before eventually, curiosity won and Anxiety went to check the door. But when the darker side looked out, there was no one there. He looked down, expecting to see a new set of books. Instead, what he found was a chocolate bar from a brand he didn’t recognize. Confused, and more than a little suspicious, Anxiety carefully bent down, picked up the chocolate, then bolted back into his room. He placed the chocolate on his dresser and carefully went over his options. 

 

_ What if it was poisoned? Who sent it? There’s no way it was actually Logic, Logic hates sweets. What if it was Deceit? What if it was a trap? What if it was from Them? What if it was a prank? Creativity was the only one he knew of that could make things Thomas didn’t know about. What if it was something that could hurt him? What if it was revenge for something he did in the video? ...What if it wasn’t?  _ Anxiety tossed the possibilities in the air, switching to Witchen in case someone somehow managed to hear him. He was right about to decide against it, when his stomach made the choice for him. It growled loudly and the side realized he had not eaten anything all day. Looking back at the candy, Anxiety took a deep breath, then tore into the wrapper. And immediately regretted it. 

 

Laughter echoed in the room and Anxiety shrieked and jumped back as tiny yellow snakes poured out of the now open wrapper. Electricity encircled him instinctively and with no hesitation, the panicked side stretched out his hands, instantly turning the snakes to charred corpses. At least, he thought he did until he blinked and all he saw was a black burn hole in his carpet. His breathing was short and ragged as he tried to calm his fried nerves. But his mind was still struggling to comprehend the fact that  _ it wasn’t real. It wasn’t real. None of it was real. Not real Not real Not real.  _ It wasn’t difficult to guess what happened. The Dragonwitch’s specialty was illusion magic. Deceit's favorite animal was snakes. He knew what had happened. He knew he wasn’t in danger. But his body just couldn’t seem to accept it. His muscles stayed tense. His magic stayed curled around his body. His breathing stayed fast and irregular. The lights kept flickering, moving almost as fast as his heartbeat. For a while he just stood frozen. Then he began to move. It started with circles. Slow, cautious circles around the burn mark, around the disintegrated wrapper. It shifted to pacing, first dazed, then firm and quick, then flighty and twitchy. From shocked, to angry, to scared. Always coming back to the fear. The Stormwitch didn’t stop pacing until he was too tired to stand, at which point he decided the couch was a good enough resting place for the night. 

 

He would wake up the next morning sore and stressed, with aching muscles and phantom pains in his scars. He would not open his door or fully turn off his magic for a full week. Many light bulbs were lost in that week. The mess was cleaned, but the burn stayed. It was okay, Anxiety wasn’t much of a candy person anyway. 

 

* * *

 

January 20th, 2017 7:24 PM

“Hey Virgil! It’s been awhile, how’ve you been?” Virgil hummed as he landed upside down on the couch. He had been surprised when his phone started ringing, but was pleased when he realized it was Mel. 

 

“Has it? Sorry, I didn’t realize how quiet I was getting on the server.” The side reached over with one hand and grabbed his journal off the coffee table near his head. The other hand stayed firmly holding the phone as he flipped open the book to his latest page of notes.

 

“It’s fine! Reality catches up with all of us at one point or another. Em was worried though.” Anxiety paused at that. He’d have to be more careful in the future. He’d hate to be a burden to the nicest people he’d ever met. 

 

“Yeah, that makes sense. I would’ve done the same thing. Tell her I’m fine and thank her for the websites she sent me. They’ve given me some really interesting stuff.” The websites in question were encrypted websites created by witches, filled with spells as well as tips and tricks to managing magic. It was like having digital spell books. 

 

“Great! I’m glad you liked them. Did you find what you were looking for?” He could hear clicking on her side of the phone,  _ probably typing on her computer. _

 

“Not exactly, but I actually think I found something better.” The witch looked over his notes again. They were a mixture of new spells and some theories on whether or not weather based magic users could control water. Apparently, as long as the water was moving due to a weather effect or was created from a weather effect that happened recently enough Anxiety could theoretically control it to an extent. But his specialty was electricity, he’d have to test it to be sure. 

 

“Really? What kind of better?” Virgil shared a summary of his findings, going into detail when asked. It was nice, just talking like this. He’d have to do it more often. 

 

“Oh yeah, could you see if either of you know of any websites on illusion magic?” He assumed based on her lack of immediate reaction or outburst that he succeeded in keeping his voice level. 

 

“Sure! Emlyn probably has a couple saved, and if not you can ask around the server. Someone is sure to have something. Why do you ask? I didn’t think you could do illusion magic.” Anxiety thought about telling her about his ceiling, but figured that’d be better saved as a surprise for another day. 

 

“Eh, I know a little. I’m mostly curious about how to know if something is an illusion. One of my neighbors has been acting weirder than normal and I wanna see if they fell for the same trick I did.” He didn’t have to specify. There was only one other witch in the neighborhood that she knew of, he let her fill in whatever blanks she wanted to.  

 

“Oh god, are they ok? Are YOU okay?” Virgil let out a small smile. Despite the fact that he knew he’d be up late kicking himself for making her worry about him, the concern still made him happy in the moment. Not even They had been this worried about him. And he knew better than anyone that worry was often an expression of love. 

 

“Yeah he’s fine. It isn’t anything too serious or even dangerous. Just had a moment last last week where I felt my eyes were playing tricks on me. And you know me, if something could be wrong I check it and double check it until I’m sure it’s fine, haha.” He was relieved when he heard her laugh along with him. It meant he said the right thing.

 

“Yeah, Puppet’s the same way. I’ll see if I can find something. Actually, you should probably ask Meta. I’m pretty sure their powers relate to changing their appearance or something. If anyone on the server knows something about illusions, it’s them.” Anxiety flinched a little. He and Meta talked some, but he still felt guilty about lying to them. Maybe if they proved they could help, he’d let them in on the secret. 

 

“Oh yeah, that’s a good idea. Metamorphosis, fitting name for a shifter.” Melody tried to scold Storm for the use of the minor slur, but he could hear her giggling in between the words and assumed it wasn’t actually that bad. And despite the voice in his head screaming at him that he said something wrong, that he would say something wrong later, that he was doing  _ everything wrong _ , it was still a relatively peaceful evening. He could almost forget his situation. Until his door shook with the force of familiar knocking. 

 

“Get out here Nightmare after Christmas, we’re doing a video!” Anxiety rolled his eyes as he tried to get his limbs to move, as he internally growled at his heart for beating out of his chest in panic. 

 

“Virgil? Who was that?” Right, he was on the phone with Mel. he was in his own realm, not Princy’s. He was in his room, not  _ Theirs _ . Creativity wasn’t mad, he was just impatient. The sudden knocking didn’t bother him, nope. Didn’t bother him at all.

 

“Oh, just the resident asshole. I’ve gotta go. I’ll see you on the server later?” It was only thanks to her voice that he was able to calm himself enough to move. It was just another video. The fan reaction to the last one had been good, right? This one would be good too.  _ But what if it wasn’t? What if the last video had been a fluke? What if- _

 

“Oh, okay. Be careful Storm.” Oh, he was already dressed and standing in front of the door. Forest was still talking to him. He shook his head to clear out his thoughts. He needed to focus. Anxiety let himself chuckle a little at Forest’s concern as a familiar smirk slipped onto his face. He could do this.

“Don’t worry Forest, I remember the plan. Play nice with the asshole and maybe everything will work out.” Anxiety thought that would be the end of it. That she was warning him to be careful not to screw this up. He forgot that she still believed he was kind by nature. Which is why he was very caught off guard and very alarmed when a soft, hurt sounding whine came from the phone.

 

“ _ No,  _ Virgil that’s not- … _ That’s not what I meant. I meant be careful with yourself. Be careful because I don’t want you hurt. Promise me you aren’t walking into a situation where you’ll get hurt. _ ” Virgil froze at her words. In all this normalcy and calmness, he almost forgot that she knew he was in danger. 

 

“ _ I… I promise. I promise I won’t get hurt today.”  _ Virgil hated that he was promising that. He hated that he wasn’t quite convinced it was true. There was no reason for him to think he would get hurt. They were just working on a video. And as violent as Creativity got, the one who physically hurt him the most was technically the Dragonwitch. And there was no way he was going back to  _ Them. n ~~o matter how he may feel about that~~ _

 

“ _ Good. See you later Stormcloud.” _ He was just going to see Thomas. He’d be safe with Thomas. With that thought firmly in place, and the promise he made echoing in his head, Anxiety put away his phone and stepped through the door.

 

* * *

 

January 15th, 2017  1:23 AM

The Dragonwitch knew teaming up with Deceit was a bad decision, really they did. But when you’re only connection to the outside world walks out on you, you just have to work with what you have. And Magnus, for better or worse, had Deceit in the palm of their hand. Sort of.

 

“Hahahaha, Witch you should not have seen the look on his face! I mean, I totally saw what happened when he opened it, but when he picked it up it was like he was getting a gift for the hundredth time.” The snake was currently halfway to the floor in laughter over something that happened six days ago. And it really had Mag questioning their life choices. Between the headache of deceiving the expert in deception and mentally translating everything the snake said the Dragonwitch was  _ this close  _ to giving up on the whole plan and just killing the fool. 

 

“While I appreciate the fact that you enjoyed yourself Dee, the little idea you had didn’t actually work.” Deceit simply rolled his eyes as he pulled himself together.  _ It was like he didn’t even care. Actually, he probably didn’t.  _

“Oh what do you mean it didn’t work? Anxiety totally didn’t spend the rest of the week cowering in his room and freaking out. The others noticed, of course, as they always do and always will. It seems to me that everything went horribly wrong.” The Dragonwitch worked very, very hard on not groaning in annoyance, and they were pleasantly surprised when they succeeded. 

 

“Yes, everything went according to plan EXCEPT… Thomas. Didn’t. Use. Magic.” Deceit gave them a confused look, as though  _ they _ were the one not making any sense. It took the snake gesturing to themself and then at the door a few times before the witch figured out what was confusing him. “And no, simply summoning the sides doesn’t count! For some reason, Thomas has decided to just accept the fact that he conjures copies of himself out of thin air because, sure, that makes sense. So, as I explained when we made this agreement, we have to do something that will show Thomas how big of an issue this is. Something that’ll make him question things. Something-”

 

“Something unlike turning an entire clearing to muck and almost burning down a forest with lightning?” He had to look so smug didn’t he?  _ How did he even know about that? _ As if sensing the witch’s question, the snake pointed out (in their own words) that as the master of disguise it wasn’t difficult for him to infiltrate the nearest village and hear the stories about the strange clearing and the mysterious purple lightning storms. 

 

“Okay fine, yes, like turning a field into mud or electrocuting a tree. The easiest way to get someone’s magic to go haywire is to make them panic. So, we have to keep scaring St- Anxiety. It’s the only way for him to realize something is up.” Deceit nodded his head as if he agreed, but he kept tapping his foot and looking intently at the floor. Just as the Dragonwitch went to call him out on it, Deceit lifted his head.

 

“But why are we trying to call attention to his magic after years of suppressing it? It wouldn’t have been better to wake it up when he was around his parents, who probably don’t know anything about it and definitely couldn’t help.” The witch let out a long sigh.

 

“The same reason you let him admit he was gay after years of suppressing that. He can only know what he wants to know. At some point, you realized that Thomas was ready to accept himself. Now, I am telling you that it is time to let him discover something else. He is ready, Deceit.” The snake clenched his fists, clearly unhappy with how quickly he lost the argument. But once again, he raised his head. And the words that came out shocked the witch for an entirely different reason. 

 

“No one can know.” The witch’s eyes widened.

 

“Wha-” The words that came out shocked them, because what came out was nothing but the painful truth that they had been avoiding.

 

“Those words have echoed throughout Thomas’s mind every time the subject of his magic comes up. And it has been my job to up hold that request- no, that command- for this entire time. Everything I have done, I have done to keep Thomas safe. Including hiding these dangerous pieces of himself. I may be a liar, but I am not a fool. If you want Thomas to accept this part of himself, you must first undo that command. The only way he will accept himself is with the help of his friends. So either you lift the block in his mind, or I make it so no one discusses this topic again.” 

 

The Dragon and the Snake locked eyes and glared at each other with all they had.

The Dragon and the Snake disagreed on a lot.

The Dragon and the Snake would never be friends.

The Dragon and the Snake came to an agreement in spite of this. 

 

“...I suppose someone can know.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Holidays my ever so patient Lovelies! Your last present of the evening is a new chapter! So sorry it took this long, but it’s a tiny bit longer than usual to make up for it. I won’t bother making promises about when the next chapter will come out because apparently every time I make a promise something happens that ends up breaking it. Maybe it’s a curse of the fanders, maybe I just overestimate myself. Either way, I missed this so much. Enjoy! Let me know if I missed some typos or tags.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! New chapter! My New Year’s resolution was to write more, and look! I’m doing it guys! That is far too many exclamation marks, but I feel they fit my level of excitement. Things are moving along nicely, and I am very excited for the twists to come. Here’s to hoping I keep this up, enjoy the chapter Lovelies.

January 20th, 2017 8:03 PM

Anxiety peaked down the stairs to the common area to find the three main sides in their usual spots, and a quick glance at their faces showed him that he didn’t have to worry about being spotted. Well, he couldn’t see Logic’s face from the top of the stairs, but he had a good view of the remaining two’s eyes that were blank and glowing. He moved quietly and perched on the landing step, relaxing as he noticed the dark blue light coming from the hallway next to him, clearly signalling Logic’s location and blindness. 

 

“Now remember Specs, you’ve gotta be over the top about it. Not silly, but enthusiastic. Eye catching click-bait is all the rage right now, right?” It was almost unsettling seeing the Prince’s dramatic hand gestures and wide grin when his eyes were pools of a bright shade of red. Anxiety, his fear getting the better of him, almost compared it to a demon from hell. Or maybe something like the mothman from that conspiracy video he watched last week. 

 

“Yes Creativity, I remember. While I am not entirely convinced this isn’t just another bout of ridiculousness, I will acknowledge that dramatized actions and exaggerated titles do improve the viewership of a video. And it is only logical that we do whatever makes Thomas as successful as possible.” The blue light next to Anxiety grew closer and shifted in a way that let Ann know that Logic had just fixed his glasses while taking his usual spot. 

 

“Well kiddos, I see where you’re coming from, and I completely support it, but just remember not to over do it alright? There’s a difference between a catching line and lying.” The fatherly side had his hands behind his back and was swaying in excitement, giving Creativity a strange, shifting back-light. Pupils or not, Anxiety could feel Logic rolling his eyes and decided he would spare his favorite side from whatever insult was coming his way. Better to step in before it can devolve into a full argument.

 

“So is someone going to explain why you’re all standing here like blind idiots or can I go back to my room?” The darker side smirked in satisfaction as he watched all three sides jump in alarm at his voice. Small victories and all that. 

 

“Oh! Hey Anxiety! We’re getting ready to pop into Thomas’s storytime video! Wanna join?” Anxiety had to reassure himself many times that Morality couldn’t actually see him as eyes overflowing with pastel pink light looked directly at him. 

 

“I wasn’t really going to involve you, but Specs insisted.” Anxiety’s eyebrows scrunched in confusion and he leaned around the railing of the steps to peer at the intelligent side.

 

“It was your idea to make a video containing all the things fans seem to respond to. And, for some bizarre reason, the fans respond well to Anxiety. The character, not the feeling of course.” Anxiety tried and failed not to take offense to that. “It only makes sense that we make him involved.” The suspicious side looked around the room with narrow eyes, trying and failing to see the point in their actions. 

 

“Soooo, why are we just standing here? If we’re doing a video shouldn’t we be, ya know, in the video? Where the cameras can actually see us?” The Prince scoffed and glared and  _ wow did Anxiety regret comparing him to a demonic mothman cause that is absolutely terrifying.  _

 

“We’re here, Doom and Gloom, because Thomas doesn’t know we’re gonna be in the video. Duh.” Knowing that that was an absolutely horrible idea that was bound to make Thomas angry and annoyed and make him hate the sides forever, it took every ounce of Anxiety’s self control to not immediately warn his creator. Or at the very least pump the breaks on this stupid idea. But he didn’t. He bit his tongue and held his temper and challenged every instinct he had. Because Puppet told him to be nice. Because Forest told him to be careful. Because this had been the weirdest month of Virgil’s life and he was not breaking his not-ruining-Princy’s-dreams streak for this. So Anxiety blinked until his eyes were purple, reapplied his confident, villainous attitude, and focused very hard on being as agreeable as possible.   
  


* * *

 

January 24th, 2017 12:32 AM

Thomas didn’t enjoy lightly banging his head against the nearest wall, really he didn’t. But having to listen to two, normally subconscious, beings that were really pieces of himself argue over mundane tasks for three hours straight would give anyone the weird urge to chuck themself into the nearest wall. Or maybe he should just put his head through the wall. That’d probably get their attention. And if it didn’t, the inevitable concussion would no doubt shut Logic up for awhile. 

 

“But Logic, they’ve been such a good friend, and it’d be so rude of us to say no, and-”

“And I am telling you that it just is not possible! There is no way we can just buy a plane ticket and-”

“They’re hurting Logic, we just have to go!”

“No we do not! We are barely even friends with them!”

“That’s not-”

 

It really wasn’t that bad at first. Yeah, Thomas had noticed that the two had very different opinions, and Morality’s puns and dad jokes always drove Logic up the metaphorical wall, but it had always been short spurts of tension. It used to be that the two sides would argue a bit, then something would distract them or Thomas would call them out on it and everyone would move on. But lately, it’s felt like nothing could stop the two of them once they got started. If only Thomas could remember what it was that always-

 

“Oh would you just STOP! Your argument is pointless Morality-”

“Pointless!?! Are you saying friendship is pointless?!”

“I am saying that they live on the other side of the country, we-”

“Love has no limits Logic!”

“That is not how-”

 

“ **ENOUGH!** ” Both sides jumped and looked to Thomas in shock. It seemed they finally noticed the fact that their creator was on his knees on the couch with his forehead pressed to the wall of the living room and they (hopefully) noticed the pain he was in. There was a few more moments of silence that Thomas enjoyed greatly before Morality decided to speak up.

 

“Um… you okay there kiddo?” Thomas cringed at how hesitant Morality’s voice sounded. He’d never actually screamed at any of his sides, though he had definitely heard them scream at each other. Well, maybe he had screamed at Anxiety once, but that was more of a fear scream than- “Thomas?” Oh right, they were still there.

 

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m good Dad. Just got a headache. And am maybe a little exhausted. And maybe-” Morality probably would’ve squealed in joy at Thomas actually calling him dad, if it weren’t for the fact that Logic chose that moment to prove his point.

 

“Ah ha! Thomas is currently feeling ill, which means it would be incredibly detrimental to his health to travel at the moment. Ergo, we cannot go to support this friend of his in person.”  _ Oh god not again. _

 

“Wah- Lo you can’t just-”  _ No more fighting. _

 

“I cannot what Morality? I cannot look after Thomas’s physical well-being? You are Thomas’s feelings, do you not care how he feels?” Thomas tensed as he physically felt how much that statement hurt Morality. It was like being stabbed in the heart with guilt and pain and he had to step in, he had to, this was going too far. He had to stop them, he had to  _ fight  _ this. 

 

“Gah, Logic I said enough!” Thomas whipped around and sat on the couch properly, with an expression on his face that he hoped conveyed just how done he was with the situation. 

 

“I, um, me? You were, you were saying enough to… me?” Thomas sighed and put his head in his hands. Partially because he could be so  _ stupid _ sometimes and partially because he didn’t want to look at Morality. The fatherly side was still staring at Logic in shock, a couple stray tears rolling down his face that he probably wasn’t even aware of. Not that Logic noticed. No, the teacher was much too preoccupied with responding to Thomas. 

 

“I was saying it to both of you, actually, but at least Morality had the sense to stop the first time I asked.” With a bit of courage and sanity gathered, Thomas raised his head to the sides in front of him. Logic was looking between Morality and Thomas in confusion, while Morality had stubbornly turned his back on Logic. The parental side had his arms crossed and was radiating subtle fury. But only Thomas saw the silent tears dripping down.

 

“I… I do not understand Thomas, I was simply trying to convey to Morality that-” All it took was a raised hand to silence the side before him. He wasn’t sure if it was because Logic knew he was mad or if it was some ability or sway he had over the sides. Something to look into later. 

 

“Morality, I am very sorry, but flying across the country to see someone on such short notice just isn’t realistic. No matter how much I want to help them. Okay?” Thomas leaned forward and to the left so he could better see the fatherly side’s face. The side in question met his eyes briefly before looking down to the floor. After a couple tense seconds, the heart nodded his agreement. Once Thomas was sure that his heart heard him, he turned to his mind.

 

“Logic, what you said to Morality was very mean and very untrue. We all know Morality cares and it was ridiculous of you to imply otherwise. Also, instead of simply tearing down Morality’s idea, why don’t you use your intelligence to think of another one. A solution that’s a bit more practical, maybe?” The mind looked at Morality’s back, then at the ground, then nodded to Thomas. 

 

“Yes, that is… that is a very logical idea Thomas. Perhaps… we could call them? Or use some other form of electronic communication to show them our support through words of encouragement. Is there… Thomas is there something I am missing? Because you are treating us as though we have done something wrong. Which does not make a lot of sense because everything I do is-” Another hand raise and blissful silence follows. 

 

“Sorry, Teach, you just, you started rambling there a bit. That’s a good idea, there is nothing stopping me from calling them or texting them to make sure they’re okay and that they have someone to talk to. As for what you’re missing… guys I’m sorry but this has got to stop.” There was a sound of movement, then Morality was sitting next to Thomas with a hand on his back. All signs of his tears had vanished, leaving a concerned, but still normal looking Morality.

 

“What do you mean kiddo? I know that kinda got out of hand” Thomas cracked a smile as Morality gently waved his hand in front of him. Logic’s groans went ignored. “But I have a feeling you’re talking about something else.” 

 

“Yeah, well- no, actually. I was talking about today, but I was also talking about something else. I’ve started to realize that… I am an indecisive mess.” 

 

* * *

 

January 26th, 2017 10:43 AM

Anxiety laid on his back on top of his outer room’s coffee table, eyes glowing purple. He wasn’t quite comfortable being present for the production of this video. Too much guilt associated with it. After all, it was his fault the argument had escalated the way it had. So instead of standing around with the others, pointing out everything wrong with it, he simply adjusted Thomas’s level of anxiety and left the others to figure it out. It wasn’t as exact as he would like, but it got the job done. 

 

“I still do not understand why we must be in our- I mean these childish onesies on screen. They have nothing to do with the topic of the video, and are therefore pointless.” Virgil grinned,  _ or maybe Thomas was grinning,  _ as Logic stood pouting in his unicorn onesie.

 

“Aww sure it does Logic! It shows people that we have something in common.” Logic sighed deeply, but didn’t argue. 

 

“Oh come on Specs, don’t pretend you don’t love this. I still have pictures from the morning you stumbled down to the kitchen wearing that thing.” Prince was smirking from where he was busy setting up the cameras, and was also smart enough to stand on the other side of the tripod when he said this.

 

“It was one time! Thomas was hungover! We agreed not to speak of it Creativity!” Virgil nearly fell off the table with how hard he was laughing. It was nice, watching their craziness without ruining it. 

 

“Yeah, but just cause I’ve only seen it once doesn’t mean you don’t wear it all the time.” Logic looked ready to leap over the equipment to defend his honor at that point, before Thomas brutally sealed his fate.

 

“Well Teach, if you really consider this a punishment then just think of it as payback for all the headaches you helped cause.” That comment effectively shut down any and all arguments the logical side may have had. With filming now running smoothly, and no interruptions in sight Virgil deemed it safe to answer his phone, which had been consistently buzzing for the last hour or so. When he first joined the server, he had wanted to turn off the notifications. But he had been fearful of missing something important. Now, he kept them on for a different reason. The constant buzz from his phone helped remind him that he wasn’t quite as alone as he used to think. 

 

General

 

**FireBall:** Guys I’m telling you this is brilliant.

 

**Encoder:** Fire  _ please _

 

**FireBall:** nonono it’ll work trust me

 

**Metamorphosis:** Fire no.

 

**FireBall:** Fire yes

 

**Somniator:** I don’t really see the problem with it. It’s not going to work, but is there any harm in letting her try?

 

**FireBall:** wow Somni I was almost really touched

 

**StormCloud:** Ok what did I miss?

 

**FireBall:** Yay Weatherman’s here! Help me convince the others that this is like, the best plan ever.

 

**Metamorphosis:** Storm don’t do it, it’s terrible.

 

**StormCloud:** Guys you gotta tell me what it is first. 

 

**Encoder:** Fire has found the perfect way to blow up her dorm building. 

 

**StormCloud:** She What.

 

**FireBall:** ITS NOT GONNA BLOW UP

 

Warning! All caps messages are against rules, next offense results in banishment

 

**Somniator:** Hey Coder, do all cap messages actually result in banishment, or is that just a scare tactic? 

 

**Encoder:** Shhhh Writer you aren’t supposed to give my secrets away.

 

**FireBall:** WAIT ITS BEEN A BLUFF THE WHOLE TIME

 

Warning! All caps messages are against rules, next offense results in banishment

 

**Encoder:** Fire I swear to God if you send one more text with caps lock on it won’t be a bluff.

 

**FireBall:** Sry.

 

**StormCloud:** As much as I’d hate to encourage the idea, can someone please explain to me how a dorm building is about to explode? We’re witches. With magic. You can’t say that shit and expect me to disregard it as a joke.

 

**FireBall:** It’s not gonna blow up the dorms, these guys are just worry warts. 

 

**Somniator:** The heating system in her dorms broke down sometime last night. Fire has had the brilliant idea of using some of her namesake to heat the air in the vents and act as a heating system herself. 

 

**StormCloud:** That… is a very, very, very bad idea.

 

**FireBall:** D: Storm! You were supposed to be on my side.

 

**StormCloud:** I am on your side. That is why I am stopping you from doing something that will get you killed and/or arrested. 

 

**Metamorphosis:** Listen to Storm, Fire. He speaks wisdom. 

 

**Encoder:** For the love of everything listen to Storm. 

 

**Somniator:** I mean, even if it doesn’t blow up the dorm building, it’d definitely make people suspicious. We don’t want that, do we FireBall?

 

**FireBall:** ...no…

 

**StormCloud:** Well now that that disaster is out of the way, where is everyone? 

 

**Encoder:** Work, school, other obligations, or sleeping. Things get pretty quiet this time of day on a Thursday. 

 

**Metamorphosis:** Oh yeah, you aren’t normally on at this time of day either Storm. Day off or something? 

 

Virgil closed his eyes for a moment, not quite tapping into Thomas’s viewpoint, just reaching out enough to hear the other’s voices. It was like listening to a conversation on the other end of a tunnel, but it worked well enough. It sounded like Creativity and Logic were arguing about some section of the script, which was normal enough to ignore. 

 

**StormCloud:** No, just taking a break. Coworkers were driving me crazy.

 

**Somniator:** Ah, the joys of working from home.

 

**Encoder:** ^^^^

 

**Metamorphosis:** Lucky. I’m still stuck in school.

 

**FireBall:** *gasp* Txting in class Meta! How naughty.

 

**Encoder:** Please never say that again.

 

**Metamorphosis:** What, are you saying you aren’t texting in class right now Fire?

 

**FireBall:** Nope! I have my first class of the day at noon. Perks of college kiddo ;)

 

**StormCloud:** Why did you wink there? The wink was not necessary.

 

**Somniator:** FireBall… you aren’t drinking are you?

 

**FireBall:** What? No. Why would you think that???

 

**Somniator:** Oh, just the fact that you tend to use more abbreviations and emoticons when you’re tipsy. I know you aren’t drunk because there aren’t any typos, so don’t worry about that.

 

**Encoder:** Omg Fire you can not be drinking at 11 am you have class soon!

 

**FireBall:** Ugh, fine  _ mom _ , it wasn’t even that much.

 

**StormCloud:** So you were drinking? 

 

**FireBall:** ...Fuck.

 

**Metamorphosis:** Fire! 

 

**FireBall:** I’m putting it up! You called me out, I’m putting it away, are you happy? 

 

**Encoder:** Yes. But next time I catch you drinking before class I am hacking into the camera on your phone and shaming you for it.

 

**FireBall:** Code wtf?!

 

**StormCloud:** Y’know normally I’d be freaking out about the fact that Code apparently knows how to do that, but Fire you need help so I’m gonna ignore that for now.

 

**Metamorphosis:** ^^^ !!!

 

**Somniator:** Sorry Whiskey, but the vote is unanimous. 

 

**Metamorphosis:** Whiskey??

 

**Somniator:** Yeah, you know. Like fireball whiskey? I just came up with it now, but I thought it was appropriate and couldn’t help myself. 

 

**FireBall:** ...yeah ok I deserve that. 

 

After a few more minutes of trying to convince Fire she has an issue, Anxiety realized that he did in fact have a job to do and he should really go back to doing it. So, saying a quick goodbye with the excuse that he was working, Anxiety blinked back into Thomas’s perspective. The others hadn’t really made much progress in his absence. Creativity and Logic were locked in an argument about how best to film the flashback scenes, Thomas had seemingly given up trying to stop them, and Morality was making faces at the camera and practicing dad jokes.  _ No doubt filling up that camera’s memory with extra footage, but at least it was funny.  _ All in all, it was a pretty normal scene. Just another normal day of making videos in Thomas’s apartment. So why did Anxiety feel like he was forgetting something? 

 

As the seconds passed, the feeling of unease grew.  _ What if he did forget something? What if it was an important something? What if What if-  _ Anxiety poured all of his senses into Thomas’s point of view. He heard how the argument was rising in volume and slowly dissolving into more of a mess. He faintly heard Morality to the left, talking to the camera as though everything was fine. He heard, and felt Thomas sigh deeply at the chaos in front of him. He felt Thomas start to fidget a bit as the tension leaked out of Anxiety and into his creator. Everything was fine. Thomas was relaxed. This was what constituted as a relatively normal, and more importantly, good day.  _ So what was wrong? What was he forgetting? He knew it was something, there had to be something, there was always-  _ A deep, familiar laugh filtered faintly into Anxiety’s senses and immediately he pushed Thomas into action. It was never a good thing when the snake was involved with something. Especially when it was something Anxiety couldn’t remember.   


 

“Uh, guys, I think we should-”  But Thomas didn’t get the chance to finish his sentence. Instead, he was interrupted by the sound of the door to his apartment swinging open. And Thomas froze.

 

“Yo Thomas I got the snacks, you got the… shows?” The figure walked in with an excited smile, but their speech slowed to a stop and their jaw dropped as they turned and stared at the scene in the living room. He remembered what he forgot now.

 

“Joan. Joan, I’m so sorry, I totally forgot I…” He had to think of something. Something to do, something to say.  _ How could he forget Joan was coming over? How could he be so stupid? How could he forget something so important?  _

 

“Holy shit, they’re real.” And all of his thoughts came to a screeching halt.

 

“Wait… you mean. You mean you can-” Joan’s awe shifted to concern as they stepped forward. His stress must have been obvious then, but Thomas wasn’t thinking about that. None of them were thinking about that. There was only one thought between all of them, all of Thomas. And the sides he had summoned stared at Joan and spoke at once.

 

“ **You can see us.** ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chat room section of this chapter was not planned but was so much fun to write and I will not apologize for its existence.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello Lovelies! I’m back! I’m actually back with a brand new chapter! Gosh, it feels so good to be able to say that. I’m still not completely free from everything but I’m free enough to write. It’s been so long I almost don’t know what to say. But I hope this chapter is everything you were hoping for because it took me forever to figure it out. I would like to note that I finished this at like 2 AM so tell me if there are errors I don’t have a beta reader. Without anymore delays, enjoy the new chapter Lovelies!

January 26th, 2017 11:36 PM

Anxiety waited until Joan was sitting on the couch, waited until he was sure Joan wasn’t reacting harshly or overly negatively, before checking out of Thomas’s senses and bolting for his door. He wasn’t even sure who he was going to run to in that moment,  _ his only friend in the mindscape wasn’t an option this time,  _ but Anxiety was a warning system and nothing could override those instincts. It turned out, Anxiety didn’t have to make the decision himself. He swung the door open, and standing there waiting was The Snake himself. 

 

“Well, good to know someone’s dealing with the situation calmly.” Anxiety barely resisted the urge to hiss as he froze in his doorway. He wanted to scream at Deceit, wanted to fry him with a lightning bolt so he could never meddle with Thomas again. His fight or flight instincts were screaming at him to  _ react  _ to  _ do something idiot, this is bad!  _ But Anxiety has played Deceit’s game before. And electrocuting the man wasn’t the answer. 

 

“You planned for this to happen. You blocked my memories of Joan’s meeting. Why?” Deceit’s smirk grew, fangs flashing in the light. 

 

“Well, I thought it was obvious! I mean, I was certain you of all people would have noticed sooner. It is your job to get Thomas moving, and hang outs with Joan are so important. I can’t believe you forgot so easily! You’re getting rusty, Anxiety.” The lightning idea was getting more and more appealing.

 

“Quit the games Deceit. You wanted Joan to find out about Thomas’s magic. Why?” Deceit sighed, finally accepting that the teasing wasn’t going to work. The mask dropped, his lips curled in annoyance, his arms crossed in frustration. 

 

“Because Thomas can totally handle his magic by himself. He’s a natural at it, there won’t ever be any dangerous repercussions to this. And on the off chance something does happen, he can always ask you right? Yeah, he’d totally listen to the side of himself that he hates the most. Especially when said side starts spouting nonsense about magic and witches. Creativity totally won’t cut you in half for it.” Anxiety could hear the exhaustion in Deceit’s voice, the honest sarcasm in it. The storm witch relaxed enough to lean up against his door frame and assumed the same crossed armed position as the Snake. 

 

“Ok, ok I get it. Thomas needs help and he won’t accept my kind of advice. Fair enough, I suppose.” Deceit raised an eyebrow at Virgil’s response.

 

“So you’re accepting my decision that quickly because… ?” Anxiety sighed in defeat and slipped his eyes closed to subtly check on Thomas and Joan. 

 

“You know why, and I’m not gonna say it.” Thomas and the three sides he had with him were still busy explaining everything to Joan. It was taking a while because they kept interrupting each other, but the story was coming out. He heard Deceit scoff.

 

“Yeah, sure, it’s not like it took me two whole years of argument and persuasion to convince you to let Thomas accept he was gay. And years more to convince him to come out publicly. It’s not like I kept him in denial and then in hiding at your request. Of course not, that’d be ridiculous. So after all that, I reveal to him that he has magic and it takes ten seconds of dialogue to convince you it was safe to do so! Yeah, that’s believable! Sure! Why not!” Anxiety knew when Deceit started pacing by the movements in the floor. It was a little confusing, trying to piece together how much was true and how much were lies. But the frustration was genuine. The anger and frustration was always genuine with Deceit. 

 

“Don’t be a bitch Deceit, I’m busy Thomas watching remember?” Anxiety didn’t have to look to know the unimpressed look Deceit was giving him. He could see it in his mind perfectly: the slumped shoulders, the lowered eyebrows, the way The Snake’s mouth formed something between a frown and a sneer. Anxiety had frustrated Deceit so much in the past, that his mental image was spot on as usual. The side of fear could tell by the annoyed and defeated tone of Deceit’s voice. 

 

“So that’s it? Really? Getting you to agree was that easy?” Anxiety sighed and let himself relax further against the door frame. In fact, he relaxed in such a way that it hid the way one of his hands slipped into his hoodie pocket. 

 

“Yep.” He let his typical exhaustion and misery slip into his voice, still keeping his eyes closed. As he did, Anxiety felt something shift in the air. Deceit’s expression shifted from one of frustration to one of concern. His eyes softened, his posture straightened. Anxiety knew it the moment Deceit’s hostility vanished from the air. 

 

“Anxiety, are you… feeling alright?” As soon as Deceit finished his sentence, a dagger went flying out of Anxiety’s hand. A loud crack of lightning sounded just as the dagger hit the wall, pinning Deceit’s sleeve. The Snake jumped away from it with a startled scream, tearing his sleeve off in the process. He frantically looked between the dagger and Anxiety, eyes wide and mouth agape. Anxiety simply smirked, eyes still spilling purple light and lingering sparks lighting his hands. 

 

“That’s for the dumb candy wrapper trick. If you’re smart, you won’t fuck with me again.” Anxiety turned his back on Deceit and slipped back into his room. He got his door halfway shut before Deceit started sputtering, still unable to form coherent words but wanting to stop the darker side nonetheless. Anxiety paused, but didn’t wait long before interrupting Deceit. 

 

“I’m agreeing with you because for once your plan is right. Thomas won’t listen to me, maybe he’ll listen to Joan. Hopefully if you were smart enough to think of this, that means you’re smart enough to  **Stay. Away.** ” 

 

* * *

 

January 26th, 2017 12:03 PM

“Yeah, of course I believe you I just-... Thomas why didn’t you tell me?” Thomas sat on the couch with his head in his hands, having been too scared to look at Joan through the entire explanation. He felt more than saw Morality flinch as the question put a weight in his stomach. He finally lifted his head, but he still refused to look at where Joan was sitting next to him. 

 

“I wanted to! God, I wanted to tell you so badly but- but I couldn’t! I couldn’t Joan! I don’t know why I couldn’t, but as soon as it happened all I could think was  **no one could know.** ”  Thomas and the three sides present all whipped their heads around to stare at Joan as they spoke the last four words right along with Thomas. And he was shocked to find them grinning. 

 

“Yeah, Talyn told me the same thing happened to them when their magic came in.” All of Thomas was now staring at Joan, jaw dropped. Joan gave Thomas a gentle smile, as though they understood exactly what was going on, which really wasn’t fair because Thomas felt like his brain was shortcirciting in shock. “Oh come on, Thomas. You really didn’t think it was the least bit suspicious how Talyn managed to change their hair color that perfectly, that often?” 

 

“I… I just thought they were good with hair dye- I… what? Joan are you…” Thomas felt like his brain was running a mile a minute trying to process everything. He was only vaguely aware of Logic finishing his sentence for him.

 

“Joan, are you saying that Talyn has “magic”? And that Thomas apparently has this same “magical” ability?” Joan sighed and leaned back on the couch. It appeared Logic’s skepticism prevented him from saying the word magic without air quotes around it. 

 

“Well I wouldn’t say the two of them have the same ability necessarily, magic manifests differently in different people. It’s determined by a combination of genetics and personality. But I would say with confidence that Thomas and Talyn are the same species.” Creativity scoffed as he finally overcame his shock.

 

“The same species? What are you- Look, Joan, buddy, I’m no stranger to make believe and magic, but this is, I mean- what you’re saying Thomas isn’t even human?” 

 

“Well, yes and no. I’d say he’s a type of human. But technically, this means he’s a witch.” Immediately Thomas, Morality, and Creativity tensed up.

 

“No, no, no no no no NO! Thomas can NOT be a WITCH!” The Prince’s sword appeared in his hand as his loud protests caused everyone in the room to flinch. Joan furrowed their eyebrows as they stared at Creativity in confusion and concern.

 

“What’s wrong with witches?” 

 

“What’s wrong with witches?! Is that even a question?! Witches are evil! They cast curses on people and steal and disguise themselves and lie and kill people and-” The sword disappeared as soon as it appeared. Morality came over to Thomas and sat next to him, squeezing his hands in a show of comfort. The Prince was now pacing the room and waving his arms around in his fury. Until Joan interrupted him.

 

“Yeah, you’re right, some witches do that-”

 

“See! I-”

 

“Just like how some humans steal and impersonate and kill people.” Creativity shifted and frowned as he considered this. The rest of the sides, and Thomas, just stared at Joan. Thomas wondered how the conversation had so quickly gone from  _ do witches exist  _ to  _ are they evil _ . But despite how much Thomas’s Logic wanted to go back and bring up the fact that witches aren’t real, he couldn’t bring himself to do it. Maybe because some part of him had already accepted it. Somewhere, deep in Thomas, the title of witch felt right. No, he knew it was right.  _ The title of witchen was right. _

 

“I- ok so maybe some people use magic for good but that doesn’t mean-” 

 

“ _ I am a witch _ ” All eyes turned to Thomas as he breathed out words he did not know. The sides looked shocked, but Joan looked more confused than anything. 

 

“Thomas, what did you say?” Joan turned themself around so they could get a better look at him, and it was only under their concerned gaze that Thomas realized his breathing had picked up.  _ Those weren’t his words, he knew they weren’t but  _ **_they were._ ** _ He was scared, he knew he was scared, why was he scared?  _ **_Breathe._ ** Logic stepped forward quickly, joining Joan in their study of Thomas. 

 

“Yes, now may be an excellent time to inquire about some of the side effects I’ve been observing.” Joan immediately whipped their head around to respond to Logic.

 

“Side effects, what side effects?” Logic adjusted his glasses and raised an eyebrow at Joan’s question. 

 

“What, are you suggesting this, ahem, “magic” doesn’t normally come with side effects?” 

 

“No, Logic, I’m saying there are a lot of different side effects to magic. Some of them are normal and easily dealt with. Some are deadly if handled harshly or incorrectly. So I’ll ask again: what side effects has Thomas been experiencing?”  _ Deadly?! What did Joan mean they were deadly- how could they be-  _ **_Breathe._ ** Morality squeezed Thomas’s hands again so Thomas was aware enough to hear Logic’s explanation. 

 

“Well, in case you are not aware Joan, we as the sides have actually always existed within Thomas but normally we exist on a subconscious level. We are not sure if everyone’s subconscious works like this or if it is just Thomas. After all, Thomas is the only mind we’ve been in. Anyway, the point is that under normal, healthy circumstances, we function without Thomas ever knowing we are there. It’s why Thomas doesn’t know everything we do, because no one can truly know what happens within their own subconscious. However, ever since we became real, Thomas has been more aware of us and therefore more aware of his subconscious. That’s why he’s been panicking more than usual, the knowledge is overwhelming him because it is knowledge he was never meant to have.” Oh, that made sense. It made a lot of sense to Thomas, but that was probably because Thomas thought of it. Joan made a humming noise as they considered what Logic said. Creativity and Morality didn’t look surprised, Logic must have already told them.  _ Why didn’t they tell him? Did they not trust him? Did his own mind not-  _ **_No it was probably for the best._ **

 

“Hmm, it’s definitely possible. I wouldn’t worry about it too much. Talyn and I can come over again tomorrow with some of their spell notes and we can work on it. It sounds like this is just an issue with Thomas letting his magic run wild instead of controlling like he should be. A bit of meditation, some lessons on basic magic, and a few spells under his belt and I’m sure his mind will stabilize. Best case scenario, the mental barrier between your thoughts and his will build itself back up and things will go back to normal.” There were a few moments of silence before Morality decided to quietly voice his thoughts.

 

“And what’s the worst case scenario?” Joan shrugged, as though they weren’t discussing the fate of Thomas’s sanity.

 

“Well, worst case Thomas will just have to train and meditate enough to handle it. But don’t worry,” Thomas tried his best to match the confident smile Joan flashed him, but he knew he wasn’t even close. “I have faith in my best friend.”

 

* * *

 

January 26th, 2017 11:23 PM

“Em, I need you to bitch about your day so I can convince myself mine wasn’t that bad.” Virgil relaxed slightly at the sound of Puppet’s laughter coming from his phone. Though, he believed it was less in response to what he said and more in response to the fact that there was no way she understood what he said. Which would be the correct assumption seeing as he was laying face down in his bed and his pillows were doing a wonderful job of muffling his voice. 

 

“Care to repeat that, Mr. Weatherman?” Virgil huffed as he turned over onto his back. It was still funny to him, how quickly his friends could cheer him up. He could already feel the smirk growing on his face.

 

“Maybe I should just change my username to that. It’d be way less ominous.” Emlyn scoffed and somehow he knew she was shaking her head at him. 

 

“Sure, it’d be perfect if it weren’t for the fact that you can only predict rain and thunderstorms.” 

 

“Isn’t that all I really need? I can just make it rain all the time. Then I’m never wrong.” Virgil smirked as he heard Em laugh. It was nice talking to Em, it was nice talking to someone with a humor and world view even darker than his. He never had to worry about scaring someone when the someone had seen far scarier things than him. He wasn’t really sure what those scarier things could be, but she had intimidated him enough for him to know he wouldn’t have the same effect on her if he tried.

 

“Ok but seriously Virge, what did you ask me before? You wouldn’t call just to discuss a name change.” Another nice thing,  _ or not so nice sometimes, _ was that Em was incredibly perceptive.  _ Sometimes too much. _

 

“Oh, I asked you to bitch about your day so mine would seem better by comparison.” Emlyn hissed in sympathy and for once Virgil didn’t mind it. It was strange, the lack of panic almost made him panic but he managed to keep it together. He was getting used to it, a little. The feeling of having people be concerned about him. The guilt was still there, but it was less than normal and that would have to be good enough.

 

“That bad, huh? Well, if you  _ must know. _ I had another  _ dumbass  _ walk in asking for a “no regerts” tattoo. That’s the third one this  _ month _ ! And you know, it wouldn’t bother me so much if these people actually got the tattoo and paid for it, but the second we start asking them about details they just walk out! Like, who does that?? Oh, then later at closing this group of drunks came in asking for tattoos, and this isn’t an unusual occurrence, most tattoo parlors get some every now and then it’s just an odd time of year for them. But anyway the group stumbles in all wanting a group tattoo of a butterfly of all things and-” Virgil closed his eyes and let Puppet ramble on. About the annoying drunks, the dude who tried to skip out on his payment the other day, that one homophobic lady who overheard Em talking to her wife on the phone. Then she gradually shifted to the better parts. She talked about that one super cool tattoo design she got to work on, the pansies that Melody put in her hair that morning, the cute drawing their adopted child Danny made her that evening. Just little things that happened throughout the day to cheer the both of them up. Virgil would make little comments or sounds of agreement to show he was listening and Emlyn would talk until she ran out of things to talk about. The two of them barely noticed how much time had passed until Melody came in the room and gently yelled at the two of them to go to bed. 

 

“Awww, but babe sleep is overrated as shit.” Virgil snorted at Emlyn’s feeble protest. And he couldn’t help the bit of tired laughter that slipped out at Melody’s response.

 

“That’s nice honey, but you still need to sleep.”

“Nooo, Melsy don’t dismiss me like that!”

“Uh huh, I’m real sorry Emmie, now say goodnight to Cloudy.” 

“Fine, fine, you win. Sweet dreams Weatherman.” Virgil calmed down from his giggling and sighed into the pillows.

 

“Goodnight Puppet girl. Say goodnight to her highness for me.” He could practically hear the smirk in her voice as she responded.

  
“Will do Rain boy.” And with that the two hung up. And Anxiety did his best to go to sleep and not think about how complicated everything would get now that Thomas’s friends knew the truth. He fought not to think about how much influence he had had over Thomas while he was watching everything. He tried not to think about whether Thomas had spoken those words at Anxiety’s urging or  _ Theirs. _ He succeeded, for the most part.  _ Now if only he could stop seeing the swirling galaxy above him every time he closed his eyes. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said I would finish this story, and I meant it. We haven’t even gotten to the explanation behind prologue so I hope you Lovelies aren’t tired of me yet.


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey look! New Chapter! In only a month! And I’ve started writing the one after this so things are looking up! The benefits of being in places with spotty WiFi and long bouts of time with nothing to do: plenty of time to write. Now, before you Lovelies read there is one thing I want to clarify. Normally, I leave these types of things to be interpreted by the reader but I fear questions will come up or things may be misinterpreted if I do not clarify one rule of my writing. At the beginning of this story, italics were used to communicate emphasis and thoughts. Gradually, they shifted to represent witchen as Virgil learned the language. At this point in the story, anything (yes anything) written in italics is meant to represent witchen. Now, enjoy the chapter Lovelies!

January 28th, 2017 12:43 PM

“Hey look you’re doing it!” Thomas quickly opened his eyes and looked at his hands in shock. He got just a glimpse of the bright golden orb of light forming between his hands before it vanished. He had been trying to cast the simple light spell for nearly three hours, and right when he had it his excitement broke his fragile concentration. Creativity groaned from his spot laying on the back of the couch.

 

“Ugh, this is boring! We’ve been at this for eons and all we’ve managed to accomplish is one measly, pathetic speck of light. What’s the point of having magic if we can’t do something cool?” Talyn shook their head and quickly reiterated their previous statement. Their hands reached out to take Thomas’s so his hands were now between the two who were sitting cross legged on the floor.

 

“No, no, no you were doing so good! I know it’s not the most interesting spell but this is how you get your magic stabilized.” Logic sent a sharp glare at Creativity before turning towards the pair on the floor with a neutral expression. 

 

“Talyn is correct. While I admittedly know nothing about magic, I do know that most new skills are achieved through intense focus and consistent practice.” Everyone ignored Creativity’s loud complaint from the couch. Thomas was very close to siding with the Prince when he felt Morality’s arms wrap around him from behind. 

 

“Yeah, you can do it kiddo! I mean really, you already did! And it was real pretty. Just dig deep into your heart, and the magic will appear!” Thomas sighed at the cheesy line but leaned back into Morality anyway. 

 

“Yeah, but you’re my heart. And you don’t feel connected to any magic, do you?” Joan gasped from their seat at the table between the kitchen and the living room. They were reading over one of Talyn’s simpler spell books, but Thomas questioned if they actually knew what those symbols meant. 

 

“Morality! Are you hiding Thomas’s magic, how could you?” Talyn, Thomas, and even Creativity couldn’t help chuckling at Joan’s joke, obvious from their over the top tone. 

 

“Well, okay, maybe his magic is in another part of his heart? But that’s what they always say in movies so I thought I’d give it a go.” Thomas smiled at Morality’s innocence, but something about what he said seemed to get Talyn’s attention. They muttered something that Thomas’s couldn’t make out, then stood and clapped their hands together to get everyone’s attention. 

 

“Okay, new idea! Let’s take a break from this and try another tactic. Princey, look alive, this’ll be interesting.” Said Prince immediately appeared at Talyn’s side, seemingly teleporting. 

 

“FINALLY! Something that isn’t boring book work!” Thomas blinked, sensing something wrong. Talyn had a smile on their face, clearly trying to get everyone excited but…  _ their hands were shaking.  _

 

“Okay, so, Morality can you help Creativity move the coffee table closer to the couch so we have more room?” Immediately both sides got to work clearing space, as Talyn walked over to Joan and took back their spell book to check something. They stood next to the stairs, seemingly double checking what they were reading. Then, they handed the book off to Logic and instructed him to step back a bit. 

 

“Well, what amazing magic will we be performing that needs this grand of an area, dear Magic Friend?” Roman was definitely teleporting at this point, there was no other way he could already be next to Logic. 

 

“Well, I’m glad you asked Creativity! Um, Morality pointed out that magic is often linked to emotions and normally there is a very, um, emotional way to wake up a witc-” Creativity cleared his throat loudly, reminding everyone that he was still against calling Thomas a witch despite Talyn and Joan’s explanations. “Right, to wake up a “magic user’s” magic. Typically, this awakening gives the user an idea of what using magic feels like and they will call on that experience to use magic again. I skipped this waking up process because, obviously, Thomas’s magic is plenty awake. But unlike most wi- users Thomas’s magic has been operating without him being consciously aware of it. It turned on gradually, without him knowing, so he has no idea which feeling is the magic feeling.” Logic’s eyes widened in realization, but Thomas was more focused on the way Joan’s eyes widened in alarm. 

 

“Of course! So we must redo the awakening process before you can properly teach Thomas, if we desire to utilize the typical teaching methods.” Talyn nodded and shook out their hands. Joan looked between Thomas and their datemate, clearly trying to decide whether or not they should speak up.  _ They couldn’t be talking about that method could they? Talyn wouldn’t, they wouldn’t, they wouldn’t, but what if- _

 

“Exactly! Now, this spell is a little tricky, but Thomas since your magic is already alive and well it should work without a hitch. What you’re going to do is wait for my signal, then do whatever your instincts tell you to do okay?” That sounded like a terrible idea, and it was at that moment that Thomas realized the buzzing beneath his skin and the pit in his stomach were symptoms from Anxiety. 

 

“How- uh, what’s the signal?” Talyn started rubbing their hands together, faint blue and green sparks appearing between them. Joan stood up, but still did not speak.  _ This was wrong, this was wrong, this was wrong, what if-  _ But this was Talyn, and Thomas trusted Talyn. 

 

“Oh trust me, you’ll know. Okay?”  _ No, nono- danger, wrong, stop. What if- what if- what if-  _ The symptoms grew, but Thomas pushed them down and dismissed them. Talyn asked if he trusted them, and he did. Sure, Joan looked nervous but if this spell was really that bad, they would have said something right?  _ Right? _ Thomas opened his mouth to respond but as he did, one of Talyn’s hands launched forward skimming over the other hand. A flare of green light shot forth and many things happened at once. 

 

Thomas threw up his arms and flinched back as something deep inside him screamed  **_NO_ ** _.  _ He vaguely registered Patton’s gasp and Joan’s strangled shout of “Wait!” He heard the impact of magic hitting ~~_the shield_~~ __ something. When he was certain that the hit meant for him wasn’t hitting, he slowly lowered his hands to reveal the world tinted by purple light. But he couldn’t see Talyn’s stricken expression as they covered their mouth with their hands, for standing just beyond his barrier of light… was Anxiety. Anxiety stood tall, facing the crowd with his back to his creator and Thomas knew that  _ he fucked up. _

 

“ **What the HELL were you thinking?!** ” Everyone flinched harshly at the loud, distorted voice of rage. Thomas heard Talyn try to speak up, and his heart broke at how close to tears they sounded. 

 

“I- I was, I was just trying to-” Anxiety, apparently opting to ignore Talyn completely, whipped around to face Thomas, and the protective shell of comforting purple dropped to reveal angry black.  

 

“ **YOU KNEW!** You  **knew** Talyn wasn’t sure about what they were doing! You knew Joan was concerned and  **trying** to say something! You  **knew** , you  **fucking knew** , you didn’t like where this was going, and what did you do?!” Thomas’s shoulders were up to his ears in shame. He didn’t even process that both Talyn had started crying. Didn’t process that Joan and Patton had gone over to comfort them. He did not process Logic’s tense glare at the floor. Nor did he see Creativity’s shocked stare. All he could see, all he could think were the harsh words of Anxiety. 

 

“You did  **nothing!** You could’ve asked Joan what their opinion was! You could have asked Talyn if they were okay! You could’ve stopped this, said no, quit,  **anything! You could have done anything and You. Did. NOTHING!** ” 

 

“ENOUGH!” It was Creativity, as it usually was, that stood to stop Anxiety’s rant. Even if Thomas did think Anxiety had a point, he would always be grateful for the save. “That’s enough useless commentary outta you, Mr. Negative. Thomas is fine.” And it seemed the save worked, because Anxiety turned his glower onto The Prince. 

 

“Fine?! You call almost getting blown up fine?! The moron nearly got himself killed!” Creativity rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. 

 

“Oh please, he would’ve been fine. And in case you didn’t notice: it worked! He used his magic, just like Talyn said he would. His magic protected him, just like they implied it would.” Both sides had their hands balled and their eyes narrowed. Both had their lips curled up in matching snarls and if Thomas wasn’t so damn terrified he would have laughed at how the two mirrored each other. 

 

“ **Fine?!** You think this is fine?! How the hell is this fine? If that barrier hadn’t appeared Thomas would have died!” This time, Thomas did notice Talyn’s harsh flinch despite being hugged by both Joan and Morality. He wanted to rush over, join the hug, and whisper reassurances to them but terror still held him in place. And that’s what this was, it was terror. Anxiety was in overdrive and Thomas was just barely holding back his panic. 

 

“He wouldn’t have died, you over the top idiot! God, do you have no idea what a friend is? Talyn would never do something to actually hurt Thomas, how could you even consider such blasphemy? All you do is spout lies about how bad everything is, for once in your life could you maybe consider the idea that risk and adventure are necessary parts of Thomas’s life?” Anxiety actually laughed at that. Head tilted back, eyes closed, laughed at that. Then in an instant, he cracked his neck and straightened to stare The Prince down like he was nothing. Smirk vicious, power almost a physical pressure in the air pushing the breath out of Thomas’s lungs.  

 

“Oh, I’m the over the top idiot? Says the pathetic child who won’t stop whining. You complained when Joan announced that Thomas was a witch. Then, you complained even more when the magic, the WITCHEN MAGIC, that Talyn was showing him wasn’t cool enough. To top it all off, you are now protesting that fact that I am pointing out how absolutely dangerous what Thomas did was. It’s almost like you want Thomas to be injured and unhappy.” Creativity gasped, and he wasn’t the only one. But Anxiety wasn’t done. “All of this noise, all these complaints, because nothing is ever good enough for our Precious. Little. Crybaby. Prince.” Each of Anxiety’s final words were punctuated by a step forward, and Creativity actually stepped back in turn. His arms had fallen to his sides, and it was with growing alarm that Thomas noticed Creativity was armed with his katana. But luckily for everyone, the sword was not lifted. 

 

“Yeah right, like I’m the one making a scene. Just get out of here and quit spoiling the fun Creep.” Despite the challenge in Creativity’s words, his tone was quiet and defeated. The suffocating feeling in Thomas’s lungs eased despite the fact that Anxiety was walking towards him again. When the menacing side was standing directly in front of his creator, he spoke in a low voice.

 

“If you ever do something that stupid ever again, I swear I will never let you forgive yourself for it. And you will never forget it. Am I clear Sanders?” Thomas frantically nodded, not knowing what else to do. With that, Anxiety stepped back into a black cloud of smoke that formed under his feet, and disappeared into the floor. For a few minutes, no one spoke left in the room spoke. Everyone stood silent, as if waiting for another scream of outrage to be let out. But when it was clear the darker side really wasn’t coming back, it was Logic who broke the silence. 

 

“Well, Talyn, you said you wanted to meet Anxiety before the day was over. I suppose... now you have.”  Talyn dropped to their knees and openly sobbed. It was made even more heartbreaking by the fact that their hair and eyes had shifted to a deep blue at some point. Thomas, freed from the sticky cloud of fear, rushed to the ground at their side. 

 

“I’m sorry, I’m- I’m so so sorry Thomas, oh god what if I had hurt you, I-” Thomas wrapped them in a hug, soon followed by Joan and Morality. 

 

“Shhh, Talyn no, Talyn it wasn’t your fault, he was right I should’ve said something. It’s my fault, I just got so scared and I should have done something, I’m the one who should be sorry.” He could feel Talyn shaking their head against his chest.

 

“No, I should have warned you but I didn’t cause I was always told that could ruin the effect. But- But it wouldn't have killed you, I swear I would never have cast it if I thought it would do anything worse than sting.” Thomas continued hugging and shushing, while Morality started humming. 

 

“I know Talyn, I know you wouldn’t have hurt me, I trusted you. I still trust you. Even now, I still trust you.” Talyn sniffled, then pushed away from Thomas so they could look him in the eye. 

 

“Promise? Promise you’re really not mad at me?” Thomas’s heart broke and his anger melted at their torn expression, and his heart knew the answer.

 

“Of course. Of course I’m not mad at you, I promise.” Talyn gave a faint smile and Thomas fought to return it. He mostly succeeded. Joan interrupted the moment with a cough.

 

“Um, I’m sorry too guys. I kinda saw the trainwreck coming and I didn’t say anything either. Let’s just promise to ask more questions next time, and call this one even okay?” Both Thomas and Talyn smiled at Joan’s suggestion, and things started to brighten up as Creativity and Logic drew their attention to the coffee table. 

 

“Well, now that the apologies are out of the way and the monstrous black cloud is gone, how about we celebrate Thomas’s successful magic lessen with some snacks and Disney movies?” Creativity said as Logic placed the last of the snack bowls on the table. The fatherly side jumped up from his spot on the floor and rushed to snatch up a cookie and claim a spot on the couch. 

 

“Great idea kiddos! We all did a great job today, and there’s nothing wrong with a good reward.” Logic stood off to the side and adjusted his glasses as he voiced his agreement.

 

“While I wouldn’t exactly call today a total success, it was not a failure either. Objectives were accomplished so a little… positive reinforcement would not be unwarranted.” Thomas stood up and helped his friends to their feet, and pretty soon all six of them were on the couch watching Disney movies. At some point during the movie marathon, Logic noticed Talyn’s hair had shifted to a mix of pink and gold, while their eyes became a lighter shade of blue. This prompted him to ask a question that had been bothering him all day. 

 

“Talyn, I have noticed that your features change without you vocalizing a spell. Is there a reason for this occurrence?” Talyn laughed and seemed eager to answer.

 

“My hair changes without a spell for the same reason Thomas summoned you guys without a spell. Everyone has a specific magic type that develops through a mixture of genetics and personality. Each magic type has certain abilities that it can perform without being forced. Imagine spells as instructions a witch gives to their magic, and abilities are things the magic does on its own.” Creativity sat up and grinned at Talyn.

 

“Oooo, so does this special ability of yours have a name?” Talyn smiled back, and their hair started shifting between multiple colors.

 

“Sort of! Most people give themselves a code name based on their abilities, so you could say my code name it also the name of my abilities.” Thomas elbowed Talyn and laughed.

 

“So, you gonna tell us this mysterious code name, or are you just gonna leave us hanging?” 

 

“Oh, right! My name’s Metamorphosis.” 

* * *

January 28th, 2017 5:42 PM

Anxiety laid face down on his bed with one of his pillows over his head. He wasn’t quite sure how long he had been laying there hating himself, but the answer was probably  _ too long.  _ At first he had been content to pace his inner room until the lights stopped flickering. He even considered going to the group chat or calling Forest to sooth his very shot nerves. Then, after a good bit of moping around and self loathing, he heard the word “Metamorphosis” come out of Talyn’s mouth and everything in him just kind of shut down. So he crawled into bed, a solution that he had used many times to solve many problems throughout the years. Not that yelling at himself in his head solved anything, but that wasn’t the point. 

 

He hated making Talyn cry. He hating upsetting Thomas so much. He didn’t hate calling out Creativity’s bullshit as much as he normally did which was concerning but decidedly not terrible. He had been hiding at the top of the stairs for pretty much the entire magic lessen, and he was glad he chose to be there. Because the one thing he did not regret at all was creating the shield around Thomas. He was still convinced that Talyn’s idea wouldn’t have actually worked. In his personal experience, his magic reacted in response to  _ pain _ not fear. And he was a literal piece of Thomas, of course he trusted his personal experience more than he trusted Talyn’s.  _ However terrible that made him feel. _ The more he thought about Talyn’s faulty plan, the less hiding under the pillows worked. He needed to  _ move, move, he couldn’t- _

 

The TV flicked on and hummed static in response to his entrance to his outer room. He scooped up one of his books from Logan but did not open it. He paced, before doing anything else he paced the room and checked the door was locked. He wasn’t sure when he picked up the habit, but it gave him something to do that distracted him from the way his arms and back felt like they were burning.  _ He wanted to trust Talyn, he did. He knew they were sorry. He knew they were upset about how that mess turned out. He knew Talyn was Thomas’s friend, he knew that.  _ But it didn’t stop him from remembering another friend who used a similar tactic. Didn’t stop him from remember sickly sweet words whispering  _ there’s more than one way to wake up magic.  _ His scars flared and burned and itched. He collapsed onto the couch on his stomach.  _ Laying on his back hurt too much.  _ He propped himself up on his elbows and opened the book where he left off. It was a mystery novel, as most of Logan’s books were. One of the characters had been taken by the villain, and were calling out for help.  _ We’re going to have to do this a bit more… abruptly.  _

 

Anxiety snapped the book shut, unable to read another word. It wasn’t uncommon for him to feel phantom pain in his scars. It wasn't uncommon for him to hear Their voice in his head. What was uncommon was the vivid memory of chains cutting into his skin. He was forced to remember the feeling of his throat going raw from screaming. He remembered the feeling of lightening and pain shooting through his every muscle. He remembered the feeling of breathing in that toxic green smoke. But it was the sudden shift to the memory of Maggie shaking his shoulders from behind saying  _ Look Storm Cloud, you’re doing it!  _ that truly broke him. 

 

Anxiety managed to drag himself into the shower a couple hours later. His face was red and blotchy and covered in smeared makeup. His muscles ached and he couldn’t tell if it was the scarring or the way he sat curled in a ball for two hours. Either way, he figured showering away the day’s stress was the best way to solve the situation. Twenty minutes later, dressed in pj's and a hoodie, Virgil laid on the floor scrolling through his phone asking the group chat for ways to relax. He wasn’t sure he deserved it, but he knew he needed it and that was that. 

 

FireBall suggested electrocuting some trees. Somniator said to either go to sleep or read a book until he falls asleep. Encoder sent him some cat videos, that was nice.  _~~Talyn~~   _ Meta recommended some relaxation music and some metal music, because apparently those are their only two moods.  The Icy and Feisty siblings both suggested video games, then proceeded to argue about suggesting the same idea. Puppet and Forest said stargazing and gardening, respectively. But it was actually the potion expert, SalemBrew, that offered an idea that caught Virgil’s eye. So, with  _ no idea _ what he was doing and yet  _ every idea _ what he was doing, Virgil closed out the chat and started running a warm bath. Once he was sure the water was high enough and warm enough, he summoned a bottle of bubble bath with a couple...  _ added ingredients _ , and whispered the spell Brew had taught him as he poured the potion into the bath. As soon as the substance hit the water it glowed and began changing colors. Bubbles burst out, gradually covering the surface of the bath and Virgil could help the smile of childish wonder that grew on his face. But… he was still exhausted and his mind kept screaming  _ What if he fell asleep and drowned? Could he even drown? What if he drowned and Dad found him? What if They found-  _ Caffeine would work him up too much to relax, so coffee was out of the question. After a couple more seconds of deliberation, Virgil summoned some purple Gatorade.  _ No, that looked too dumb.  _ He summoned purple Gatorade in a wine glass.  _ Better.  _ So, with a swirling, multicolored, magic bubble bath and a glass of wine-passing Gatorade, Virgil climbed into the bath clothes and all. 

 

As Virgil sank into the bath with a content sigh, he found that Brew’s recipe worked just as they said it would. He felt the warm water on his skin, easing his muscles, and he felt his equally warm clothes wrapped around him. Yet, when he pulled his arm out of the water, he found his hoodie sleeve was perfectly dry. Brew also included a minor healing spell that was supposed to soothe joint and muscle pain, which seemed to only be half working. _ Apparently healing spells didn’t work so well on psychosomatic pain.  _ But that was fine with him, it worked well enough to relax him. And as Virgil gazed into the swirling colors in the bath, he couldn’t help but be reminded of the swirling lights of his little galaxy. And for the first time in over a month, the thought of his stars and nebulae filled him with the comforting warmth they used to instead of the fiery pain they had become. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m not sure what’s more fun: characters dealing with a complicated mental link or characters dealing with language barriers. So why not both? Speaking of characters, I can’t wait to reveal the next new one.
> 
> Shout Out to @crystalgardian for guessing Meta's identity in a comment on Ch. 24.


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Lovelies! I actually wrote this chapter in two days, immediately following the release of the latest video. Guys, as someone who started struggling with intrusive thoughts at 12, which caused plenty of other problems that I won’t go into now, The Intrusive Thoughts video means so, so much to me. I loved every second of it and even though I have long since made peace with my mind, it still filled me with validation and hope. Also, Remus is ridiculously fun to write. Hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it!

February 7th, 2017 11:06 PM

When Thomas had initially suggested the idea of having Joan help write the script of the next Sander Sides video, Anxiety had been against it.  _ What if it changes the sides and Thomas changes? What if the change messed up Thomas’s magic? What if they disappeared? What if- _ It was supposedly to test if bringing in another writer, who had different ideas for the sides’ characterization, would cause changes in Thomas’s personality as the audience’s view of the sides changed. Which, admittedly, was an important thing to know, but Anxiety didn’t have to like it. When Joan suggested they wanted all four sides in the video, Anxiety was once again against it. He said it was because he thought the idea of a Valentine’s Day video sounded stupid, but really he thought his darker aesthetic just wouldn’t fit the mood of the video. He was also struggling to get his head around  _ why  _ Joan wanted anything to do with him after the catastrophe that was their first meeting. With how horrible Anxiety had been, he couldn’t wrap his head around how Joan had said the words they did.

 

“I want this video to reflect my first meeting with Anxiety. He’s blunt, negative, and extremely critical, but underneath all his extremes there’s a point in there somewhere.” That’s what Joan had said, when Thomas asked about Joan’s characterization of Anxiety in the script. Thomas had given a confused look, and Creativity had loudly voiced his disagreement, but Joan refused to budge and the lines stayed on the page. It made his head spin, the thought that Joan had somehow seen through his facade and  _ listened to him.  _ It was ridiculous, who would listen to Anxiety? People were taught from childhood to  _ overcome  _ their fears not  _ listen  _ to them. It confused him, which of course meant he couldn’t stop thinking about it, which meant he was getting anxious about it, and  _ now he was pacing again he really needed to stop doing that.  _

 

It was getting worse, he knew it was. The buzzing under his skin, the need to  _ do something, anything, why was he just standing there when everything was going wrong? _ His scars were getting better, but they weren’t going away. His memories of Ma-  _ Them, always Them,  _ were getting easier to revisit with time, but they were still impossibly painful. He had been talking in the group chat less, now that he knew Meta was Talyn he kept feeling like he had to choose his words more carefully. It made him tense up, where it use to make him relax. He also hadn’t shared his discovery with Mel or Emlyn because that would mean he would have to explain why he couldn’t go to Talyn for help and why they probably hated him. And then, to top it all off, to push all his feelings off the edge, Joan just had to go and throw a riddle at him.  _ Because that’s what it had to be, right? It had to be some stupid, fucking riddle because there was no way Joan actually ~~liked~~ tolerated him.  _

 

It was just a couple years ago that when he felt this wound up with energy, he’d go mess with Creativity until they were screaming at each other and as terrible as it was, it was a cathartic way to let off steam. Then he  _~~met befriended trusted lo-~~   _ started sparring lessons with Mag. Which showed him how physical exertion and real combat was even more cathartic and a much better way to dispel pent up energy.  _ But a spar with the witch at that point would probably result in a fight to the death and Virgil wasn’t sure he could handle something like that.  _

 

But fighting seemed to be his only release, as screaming just wasn’t cutting it anymore. He paced his floor,  _ door to window, door to window.  _ His energy grew as he walked, building rather than dispelling like he wanted.  _ He couldn’t fight The Prince, that would open the door to way too much violence and Morality would never tolerate it. He couldn’t fight Them, They would kill him. For all of Deceit’s talk, The Snake had always been the mastermind type. Always strengthening his wit, but lacking rather severely in actual combat experience. There wasn’t anyone he cou-  _ Wait. Anxiety froze in place, thoughts stalling as he struggled with the decision in front of him. Thousands of  _ What if _ scenarios raced past, for this was quite possibly the most dangerous idea Virgil had considered in a while. It was… impossibly stupid, and utterly pointless. There was no reason for him to take the risk. But his skin hummed and buzzed and static filled his ears as his veins sang with adrenaline and power. His lights grew brighter, but for once they did not break. He told himself, reminded himself over and over that  _ in a question between fight or flight, he always chose flight if it was possible. Always ran, always picked  _ **_flight._ ** That was what he tried to tell himself anyway, as he scooped his favorite dagger off the table and summoned extras into his pockets. He tested his ability to summon a short sword, then vanished it when his ability was confirmed. With one final glance around his room, Virgil gave into his desire and rushed off to one of the darkest corners of the mindscape. A place where only evil things were born, but for once he wasn’t as scared as he normally was. After all,  _ only evil things would hurt Thomas, so Anxiety would fit right in. _

 

Hood up, and ears perked for any signs of the good sides, Anxiety stood once again in front of the regal red door that led to Creativity’s realm. But this time, Anxiety wasn’t there to enter the realm of The Prince. No, Anxiety needed The Duke. He dipped fingers into a jar of black paint he kept tucked in his hoodie and dragged the paint in a familiar pattern around the door frame. A mixture of witchen and nonsense symbols that represented both a request for entry and a damnation of Roman’s domain.  _ Although, if some of the nonsense symbols turned out to be witchen, maybe all the symbols meant something.  _ It was something for Virgil to investigate when his arms didn’t ache and  when his adrenaline levels weren’t through the roof. As the writing was complete, it glowed a toxic green color as black ink dripped down from the top to cover the door. Once it was completely covered in its new coat of paint, Anxiety heard the distinct click of the door unlocking. With his heart hammering out of his chest, Anxiety pushed through the door and into the darkness. 

 

It wasn’t a particularly long walk through darkness to reach the Duke’s kingdom. It was a decently sized town similar to the one at the center of The Prince’s kingdom. Except this kingdom was underground, and at the center was The Duke’s Palace: a grand mansion suspended over a bottomless pit.  _ The Pit _ . The only “ _ people _ ” in it were guards placed at the gates dressed in shiny black armor that wielded a mixture of sharp spears and spiked baseball bats. Gates, that Virgil noted had severed heads on spikes at the top of them. Despite Anxiety’s mounting level of fear at the sight of the place, he kept moving, and the guards let him through without prompting just as they always did. The shadows in The Duke’s Kingdom were not normal shadows. If one were to walk into a shadow, they’d always end up somewhere else.  _ To anyone new, it was a maze hidden in plain sight. But Anxiety was welcome, and he knew where to go. _ He stepped in and out of patches of shadows, always exiting darkness in a new area of the abandoned kingdom.  _ In and out, in and out,  _ Darkness and dimness filled the place, but not once did he find light. No light, until he stepped into a patch of pitch black darkness in the shadow of the Palace wall. On the other side of the darkness, Anxiety found himself standing on a green carpet in a throne room lit by black torches with green flames. Perched on said throne, laying across it horizontal with his feet in the air, was The Duke. 

 

“Who dares enter my- Vee!” The menacing ruler act dropped into a grin of childish glee as Remus realized who was standing at the door. In seconds, Virgil was hit with a smell that made his stomach roll as arms wrapped around his neck and The Duke wrapped him in a hug. The Duke kept chanting “Vee! Vee! Vee!” as Anxiety hesitantly hugged back.

 

“Hey Ree.” The Duke pulled back slightly and started hopping on the balls of his feet. 

 

“Hey! Oh my gosh it’s you! It’s been, what? Two years? Shit, maybe even three, bitch how are you? You haven’t been to any of the meetings, it’s been four years since you’ve been to those. We kinda thought you died! Oh, where are my manners, refreshments?” Virgil grimaced and politely declined the plate of different flavors of deodorant. He hadn’t really meant to leave The Others, it just kind of happened. Training with  _ Them _ seemed more important and he only had energy for so many social interactions per day. He never really liked The Others anyway, so he just stopped going to see them. 

 

“Yeah, uh, Dee and I kinda got in an argument and we just… don’t see eye to eye on a lot of stuff, you know? Wait- ...You guys really thought I was dead?” Ree chuckled that high pitch nervous laugh of his and started backing away, taking a bite of deodorant to cover his nerves. After, he turned and took Virgil’s hand in a surprisingly smooth motion and started leading the two of them towards the doors behind the throne. 

 

“Well… Not really? But I mean you have been kind of useless lately so we may have worried a little- but no! No, we didn’t really…” Anxiety stopped in his tracks at the word useless. The Duke trailed off as he noticed the shift in his companion’s mood.

 

“Am I… Ree am I really getting useless?” It was almost touching how fast Remus fought to backtrack. 

 

“No! No, no, Vee, I didn’t mean that- I just- I mean, uh- shit. It’s just some stuff Dee’s been saying, you know how Dee loves spreading rumors around. Let’s not think about that bitch though, let’s think about us! What brought you here Veevee? Why now, after all these years?”   _ So not only was Deceit messing with him again, he was spreading rumors too. Great. Just great.  _ Anxiety hated how comforting it was to have Remus take both of his hands as he talked. Hated that it was nice having a person that was  _ there _ and  _ real  _ and actually wanted to make contact with him. It had been Remus who pointed out Virgil’s touch starvation when they were younger, and now that They were gone it was once again Remus who was offering relief from it. 

 

“Do you still have your mace?” Remus’s concern vanished and a dark grin took it’s place. He let go of one of Virgil’s hands to summon his signature weapon and slung said weapon onto his shoulder. 

 

“Now there’s a question I thought you’d never ask. Seriously, you hate my style of fun. So, what am I crushing? Or are you back for my offer of absurdly rough se-” Virgil ripped his hands away from Remus and started waving them in front of his face while Remus laughed. 

 

“Nope! No, nope, I’m good thanks. I was gonna ask if you wanted to spar.” Remus wiggled his eyebrows and elbowed Virgil’s side.

 

“Now, now, Veevee, spar is a fancy word for it, but I thought you just said no to-” Anxiety shoved the twisted side away from him in  ~~ mock  ~~ disgust.

 

“No! Ree I want to fight you! I mean- I’m asking you to fight me. I just- I used to with- and now I have too much energy and- just-”

 

“Whoa, slow down there buddy. You take everything so seriously, relax! Of course I’ll engage in some friendly dueling. Though, it’s pretty funny how fast Maggie turned you into an adrenaline junkie.” The shock of hearing  _ Their  _ name out loud hit so hard that Anxiety couldn’t have held back his violent flinch if he tried. He refuted the claim on instinct, but his head was plunged back into painful memories.

 

“I’m not an adrenaline junkie, I just-” The Duke absolutely noticed Virgil’s reaction to Mag’s name, but rather than call him out on it, Remus once again started leading the way to the doors.

 

“Now Virge, everyone knows the first step to fixing a problem is-” Taking the easy way out, Virgil ignored the use of Their name and followed Remus. 

 

“I don’t have a problem! It’s just the easiest way to calm down.” The Duke laughed, bold and confident as he walked forward. The door opened and led out onto a large field. A field which was definitely not in the palace, but somewhere else entirely. 

 

“Oh, it’s like the perfect start to a twisted detective story. Adrenaline junkie cop goes rogue searching out gruesome murderers just for the rush of it. All the blood and murder, the dramatic chase, it’s so perfect!” Anxiety rolled his eyes to cover up how much the subject of conversation bothered him. The field they had walked onto was covered in grass that was an unnaturally dark shade of green. The ‘ _ sky’  _ they were under seemed pitch black, yet the two could see perfectly. 

 

“You are not putting me in a horror story, and I am not an adrenaline junkie.” The Duke kept walking farther out into the field, but he swayed his hips and hummed in thought.

 

“Hmm, how about this? I give you the glorious fight you crave, and you let me use you as inspiration for my next story.  _ Deal _ ?” Virgil stopped as though to establish distance before the start of the fight, but really he stopped because if he moved another step he was going to be  _ sick. He couldn’t think about it, he couldn’t, he Could. Not. Think. _

 

“Same rules as always?” The Duke rolled his eyes.

 

“Yes, how many times do I have to tell you Veevee? The rules for the Kingdom of The Abandoned, as decreed by me, The Duke, is that anything goes, because nothing stays! Nothing is permanent; everything is fun! So come at me,  _ bitch! _ ” With The Duke’s final sentence representing the clear start of the fight, Anxiety summoned a short sword in one hand and his dagger in the other. Blinding white lightning shot down on top of him, then wrapped around him as a protective electric shield and Anxiety  _ lunged. _

 

The Duke grinned madly as he parried the sword attack with his mace. The lightning around Anxiety surged through the two pieces of metal, sending Duke flying backwards as he was electrocuted.  _ Don’t think, Don’t think, just Fight, Fight, Fight. _

 

“Hahahaha, so you have been keeping up with your magic! I didn’t really believe Mag when they said they had been training you, but now I can really see it!” Anxiety cracked his neck and the air around him crackled with static. Then, he straightened his posture and braced for The Duke’s counter attack.  _ Do. Not. Think. _

 

“I didn’t realize you and  _ Them _ were such good friends.” Just as expected, Duke leaped forward from the ground and swung his mace at the electric side. Anxiety tried to dodge, but his opponent was faster than he anticipated and the mace clipped his shoulder, throwing him off balance. Seizing the opportunity, the mace swung down once again.  _ Fight _ **_._ **

 

“Oh yes, we go way back. In fact, before they moved into my brother’s realm, they lived here in mine.” But this time, when the mace came at him, Anxiety dropped his sword to summon a shimmering purple shield of light. He tried to ignore how the Duke’s eyes lit up in recognition, and instead tried to focus on his next move.  _ Ignore the words. _

 

“Oh yea, guess that makes sense. There’s no way Princy would voluntarily house someone that murderous.” Anxiety spun and struck out with his dagger, getting a hit in The Duke’s side as he used the shield to keep the mace high in the air.  _ Fight. _

 

“Exactly! Ro’s way,  _ way  _ too dull and boring to be friends with someone interesting like that. So, several years ago, I snuck Mag into the kingdom up top so they could cause some trouble.” The Duke let go of his mace and grabbed the sword Anxiety dropped off the ground. Before Anxiety could realize what was happening, pain burst from his shoulder as the sword went right through it. Anxiety was stuck, staring into The Duke’s crazed and triumphant eyes, and for a moment neither moved. Then, Anxiety grit his teeth and smiled through the pain. And as The Duke raised his eyebrows at the act, he whispered just loud enough for his attacker to hear.

 

“I win.” There was only a moment of confusion on Remus’s face before purple and white electricity shot from Anxiety’s shoulder, through the sword, and Duke fell to his knees convulsing as though he had been tasered. Anxiety let Duke fall back onto the ground, still shaking through the effects of the spell, as Anxiety took a deep breath and braced himself. He couldn’t help the scream he let out as he ripped the sword out of his shoulder, but as soon as it was out he felt his wound closing up. Meanwhile, Duke had started laughing as feeling returned to his face and his convulsions slowed. 

 

“I’ll say, Vee, that is one hell of a trick you got there. A little lacking in the gore department, but A plus in the pain category.” Virgil panted hard and gave himself a moment to just _feel._ He felt the _magic,_ the _adrenaline_ as it sang in his blood. It flowed through him, filling him with _power, fear, strength, panic,_ ** _Anxiety._** He was in _danger._ He was _fighting_. He was drowning in the feeling; he _hated_ it. _But it was oh so good to be_ ** _alive._** To be **_real._** He wasn’t useless. He wasn’t fading. **_He wasn’t finished yet._**

 

“ _ Again?” _ The  _ look _ in The Duke’s eyes was as wild as Anxiety's felt. The two sides grinned at each other as they readied themselves. Then, the field once again filled with the sound of clashing weapons and crackling power. 

 

For a while, that’s all they did. Crash after crash,  _ fight  _ after  _ fight  _ after  **_fight._ ** Sometimes Anxiety won. Sometimes The Duke won. Each time one accepted defeat, the wounds disappeared like it never happened. Even the blood that should have been filling the field dissipated every few fights. For the next few rounds, conversation stopped as the two focused on winning. Until eventually, The Duke’s voice rang in the clearing, as casual sounding as one could be while wielding a blood covered mace. 

 

“What if Thomas stepped in front of a bus?” Anxiety, too focused on acting without thought, reacted on pure impulse. 

 

“ _ What if Thomas crashed into a bus with his car?” _ And back and forth the two went. Speaking without thinking, fighting with passion, giving in to the heady feeling of adrenaline highs. 

 

“What if a car crashed into him?” 

_ “What if he got in a wreck and the other person sued him?” _

“What if he killed a dog?”

_ “What if his friends left him when they found out?” _

 

“What if-” after  _ “what if-”  _ after “What if,” the sides echoed off each other, fueling their instincts until it was all they were. Anxiety and the Darker side of Creativity spiraling into nothing but  _ purpose  _ and  _ instinct _ . It was their Titles, it was the purpose they were assigned to. They were The Others. They were the ones no one liked to listen to, so they listened to each other.  _ Even if they didn’t really like listening to each other either.  _

 

When the two sides eventually succeeded in tiring each other out, they took a moment to just lay in the blood soaked grass and  _ breathe.  _ Remus was faintly giggling between breaths, no doubt thrilled with the amount of inspiration this battle gave him. Meanwhile, it was taking all of Virgil’s willpower not to puke as he processed the fact that he was laying in blood that may or may not have been his. The nausea didn’t lessen at all as he started to truly process how messed up and  _ bad _ and  _ evil _ his actions had been. 

 

“Whew! I haven’t had that much fun in… gosh Veevee, I don’t even know!” Remus rose to his feet and looked around at the field as it gradually started resetting itself. But Virgil was more focused on the way his breathing was too fast and now that he gave himself a moment to think all he could think was  _ How could he have done this? How could he have gone to hang out with The Duke? The Duke who was evil and bad and everything Thomas didn’t want to be? How could he help someone like that, be- be something with a person like that? What if someone found out? What if Morality foun-  _ Anxiety quickly got to his feet and nodded in a way that had to be far too suspicious.

 

“ **Yeah!** Uh, I mean, Yeah! That was- uh, that was… fun. Maybe we’ll do it again sometime, but  **I** gotta **gobye!** ” Anxiety turned to bolt and he didn’t feel at all guilty when he got a brief glimpse of the confused look on Remus’s face. 

 

“Wait, Vee? Vee!” Anxiety  _ did not _ look back, he sped up and fought to ignore his thoughts. Thoughts that said  _ This was wrong, this was bad, he could kill you. He could get you killed. This was not helping Thomas, this was  _ **_hurting_ ** _ Thomas. He couldn’t be encouraging this side of Thomas. ~~He couldn’t be friends with him. They weren’t friends, they weren’t.~~ _

 

“Don’t worry about it Duke, I just need to-” He nearly jumped ten feet as he felt Remus grab his wrist. 

 

_ “ _ **_Virgil_ ** _!” _ It was only the desperation in The Duke’s voice that made him stop and look behind him. And when he did look, he met The Duke’s eyes to find a look he had only seen a handful of times. A look so serious and so out of character it commanded the terrified side’s attention. But The Duke did not speak. He gave Virgil a chance, as he always did when he got like this. He gave the younger side a chance to run. Because he knew he never would.

 

“...What? What is it Remus?” Virgil broke eye contact as he spoke, instead opting to look at the grass between them. He mentally noted the lack of blood, as though this conversation could be wiped away just as easily. 

 

“...You’re still scared of me.” Virgil didn’t look up. He couldn’t look at the gentle expression he knew he would find.  _ He didn’t deserve it, he was the villain. He was evil and wrong and dangerous.  _ Virgil lied.

 

“I’m not. I just have somewhere to be.” The grip on his wrist tightened before Remus’s hand lowered so it was gripping Virgil’s hand instead of his wrist. 

 

“You’re a good liar. But no one beats Deedee.” Anxiety gulped. He still refused to look up.  _ He was scared. He was scared because this was wrong. He was scared because he could be killed for this. Thomas could be abandoned for thinking something like this.  _

 

“You’re dangerous. This was wrong. I can’t be here.” He couldn’t lie, not to Remus. It wouldn’t work, Remus and Deceit spent too much time together. His body language was too out of control, and Remus had a finger on his pulse. The Duke sighed at the words. 

 

“You’ve been spending too much time watching them. Dear old Dad has got you wrapped around his finger, he’s convinced you that we’re bad.” Virgil ripped his hand away.

 

“ _We are bad, Ree!”_ The Duke shook his head, as Virgil finally lifted his head to look at him. 

 

“We’re natural, Virgil. We wouldn’t exist if we weren’t. Everybody sins, Veevee. Just like everyone has to-” Anxiety shook his head and looked to the ground again. He couldn’t keep looking at Remus if he wanted to think. The Duke was too confident, too certain in what he was saying. It didn’t matter that he had been shunned, it didn’t matter if he was technically a duke,  _ he had the confidence of a King. _

 

“We aren’t right, Duke! We’re wrong, we don’t help Thomas we just hurt him. I mean-  _ shit _ Ree, he’s gonna have one hell of a nightmare after this. He’s-” 

 

“Only going to be hurt if Morality convinces him it’s wrong.”

 

“Ree, deciding what is right and wrong is Morality’s  _ job.  _ If he says it’s bad, then it’s bad!” Anxiety willed away the tears that almost reached his eyes.  _ Why did Remus have to complicate things? Why did he have to question everything? Why did he have to say it with so much confidence? _

 

“Yeah, and your job is alerting Thomas to threats. Tell me, are you perfect at your job? Have you not overreacted in all your years of existence? Has Roman never gotten carried away with a project? Has Logic never been too strict? Deceit too cruel?” Anxiety felt his blood boil with power. He was weak, so very weak after the battle he just fought. But  _ he  _ **_wasn’t finished yet._ **

 

“It is Morality’s job to decide what is _right_ and what is _wrong_ and to command Thomas to do right. It is my job to decide what is _safe_ and what is _dangerous._ **You** are dangerous. **I** am dangerous-” Anger was starting to creep into both their voices, and Virgil feared what this argument was building to.

 

“A knife is dangerous, Anxiety, you still need one to make eyeball soup.” Lightning cracked in the distance. Anxiety was hit with a wave of deja vu that nearly knocked him off his game. But he knew the words he had to say.

 

“ **I** **wasn’t finished.** It is also my job to protect Thomas. Protect him from outside threats, and _from himself. And in case you haven’t noticed, that includes_ ** _protecting him from US._** ”  Anxiety met The Duke’s eyes as he said this, and was surprised to find none of the anger he was expecting. Instead, all he could see in Remus’s expression was disappointment and resignation. 

 

“Okay.” Virgil raised an eyebrow.

 

“Okay?” Remus sighed, and Virgil’s confusion grew.

 

“I know a lost battle when I see one. I just want you to know that my home is always open to you, when you finally decide to shake off Morality’s stupid rules and accept yourself. When you finally realize that I’m not nearly as scary as you think, there’s a bed that’s got your name on it.” With those words, Ree snapped his fingers and Anxiety’s vision was blocked by darkness. When the darkness lifted, Anxiety found himself facing the door to the exit. 

 

When he walked through the door and checked his phone, he found that it was practically morning with how late it was. He also had a few missed calls from Melody, which didn’t help. Emotionally, he felt worse walking out than he did when he went in, but…  _ But the painful, buzzing, itch under his skin was gone. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This seems like a little self contained bonus chapter that can be skipped. It’s not. Have fun guessing why.


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look at that! New chapter, less than a week. Hopefully I can keep this productivity going. It’s been a little weird writing these next couple chapters, because my mind is a little bit ahead of itself plot wise. I’m trying really really hard to not accidentally gloss over what is currently happening, but I’m excited for the future so it’s a little tricky. Let me know if I make things unclear or if something seems weird, okay Lovelies? Anyways, enjoy the chapter! Next one will be soon.

February 8th, 2017 9:23 AM

“Hey Virge, you weren’t answering any calls last night. I got kind of worried. You okay?” Virgil laid on his stomach on the coffee table in his outer room, head and legs hanging off the table as he held the phone to his ear. He let out a groan at the question, which only made Mel worry more. “Virgil?”

 

“So I may have… gone and spent most of the night at my shitty Ex’s place?” Forest let out a low whistle that screamed  _ yikes. _

 

“Ouch, shitty Ex as in cheater, or shitty Ex as in shitty person?” Anxiety grimaced.

 

“Okay, Ex might have been too strong of a word. It’s more like he aggressively flirts with everyone and anyone who would give him the time of day, and once upon a time I may have taken him up on the offer. Like, we weren’t really friends or lovers or anything concrete like that, I just got lonely sometimes and his couch was open.” Melody hummed in a way that said she knew exactly what he was talking about. 

 

“So other than a casual fling, what’s he like? You sound terrible, so it’s obvious good things didn’t happen. When you say you spent the night, did you mean…?” 

 

“Ew, no, he offered but no, I’m  _ never  _ doing that again. As for what he’s like, think… creative person who’s also a drug addict and has a very, very,  _ very dark sense of humor. _ Like, giggles about the idea of murder and horror stories and zero filter. I don’t even know why I went, he’s such a piece of shit and he gives off…  _ so many  _ red flags.” Forest hummed in thought for a moment. Anxiety expected some light scolding for doing something so dangerous,  _ light scolding because Mel hated being rude. _ But instead, she took on a more serious tone that Anxiety couldn’t put his finger on. 

 

“I think I know why. You’re someone who’s seemingly surrounded by people who don’t like you. People who you have to keep up an act around to avoid pain. You were stressed and lonely, so you went looking for someone who you knew wouldn’t care what you did or said. You could say or do whatever you wanted, and they’d laugh it off because nothing you could do or say would be as messed up as what he was doing or saying.” As Melody talked, Virgil lowered his head and tried to press it against the cool wood under him. It was both alarming and calming how easily explained his behavior was.

 

“How do you do that?” Melody laughed, but it sounded slightly pained.

 

“I’m quoting my therapist, actually. Many witches struggle with feeling like they’re a bad person, so it’s a surprisingly common problem. We’re attracted to twisted people in times of doubt. It’s nice, knowing you aren’t the worst person in existence.” It was Virgil’s turn to hum in agreement. Normally he would be concerned that he was worrying her, or that the conversation wasn’t interesting enough, but it seemed his nerves were still too exhausted to think about that. 

 

“Welp, now that we’ve held my weekly therapist session with Dr. Pierce,” Mel laughed, “why aren’t you at work?” Virgil smirked as he could feel the soft smile through the phone.

 

“Took the day off. Danny’s magic has been a little finicky and I felt bad making our usual sitter deal with that.” Virgil sat up and reached for his nearest notebook. 

 

“Oh yeah, what is Danny’s magic type if you don’t mind me asking?” Forest sighed a world weary sigh.

 

“Telekinesis mostly.” Anxiety hissed in sympathy.

 

“Yeah, that’s a tricky one. I can already imagine the things flying around poltergeist style.”  _ Poor kid, what if they get hurt? What if- _ Not too exhausted to worry about his friends’ child apparently. 

 

“Yeah, it’s a bit of a challenge. But hey, perks of having a house in the middle of the woods.” Virgil wasn’t really writing in his notebook, more just running his hands over the markings he put in it. 

 

“So you’re literally the Forest Queen, huh?”  _ Something was wrong, Thomas was waking up. _

 

“Yep, it’s a pretty nice place. Could be your place too, if you would take the offer…”  _ He needed to check, he had to know. _

 

“I’m sorry Mels, I gotta go.” She sighed, but knew better than to push the subject.

 

“Yeah, okay Virge. Take care Storm Cloud.” Virgil said some sort of goodbye in response, but his mind was elsewhere. He blinked his eyes closed and focused his attention on Thomas.  _ And he prayed that he hadn’t caused any nightmares, though he knew the truth.  _

 

* * *

 

February 8th, 2017 11:43 AM

Thomas yawned as Joan and Talyn made their way into the apartment. It was another day of magic training, then work to edit and memorize the script for the new video. Unfortunately, since they wanted to use Valerie in the video, they couldn’t use the sides to film it. Which meant that Thomas had to memorize all of the lines himself. It wasn’t that difficult to do, it was just nice only having to memorize some of the lines, or no lines, for the last two videos. 

 

“Hey Thomas! Ready for another day of magic?” Thomas smiled at his friends and tried his best to be enthusiastic. In the couple of weeks they had been training, Thomas had finally gotten the hang of the light spell and was even able to move the light around in the air. The next spell they had decided to tackle was the shield spell, but no matter how hard Thomas tried he couldn’t seem to get it to work the way it did before. 

 

“You okay? You look exhausted.” Joan walked over and frowned at him. 

 

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine. Just had a couple nightmares last night. But, I barely even remember them so it’s not that big of a deal.” Talyn looked concerned, but Thomas’s two nonbinary pals decided to let it go for then.

 

“If you say so. Now! Cast the light spell first, as a warm up, then we’ll work on the shield spell.” With a deep breath, Thomas moved to the center of the living room and spoke the words of the spell. In seconds, a golden ball of light formed and floated above his head. Joan sat on the couch and watched with a wide grin.

 

“I don’t think I’ll even get over how cool that is.” Thomas laughed and tried to get the orb to float higher. To his delight, it obeyed and even began to change colors.

 

“You and me both, Joan, this is awesome!” Talyn nodded with a soft smile on their face.

 

“Now, drop that spell and let’s try to cast a  _ Shield _ .” Thomas nodded slowly as he processed the word that was still new, yet familiar in a way he couldn’t place. That was how all Witchen was, to him.  _ New but Not _ . He hadn’t decided if that made learning words easier or harder. 

 

“Any more advice for this go around? Or should I just… keep focusing?” Joan shrugged, but Talyn seemed to take the question seriously.

 

“I mean, what did you feel when you did it the first time?” Thomas sighed, as he had been asking himself the same question for days.

 

“I dunno, tense? Scared? There was… maybe something else? But I don’t know what the something else was.”  _ There was a word in Thomas’s mind for it, but the word wasn’t English and Thomas couldn’t pronounce what he did not know.  _

 

“Maybe, instead of trying to put it into words, just try to replicate the feeling? Or like, hold onto it, you know?” Joan’s idea wasn’t bad, Thomas supposed. So, focusing on the  _ word _ he didn’t really have a word for, Thomas closed his eyes and  _ pulled. _ For a few moments, nothing happened.  _ Then- _

 

“What do you want?” All eyes snapped to the stairs, where an annoyed emo sat looking very unimpressed. 

 

“Umm… what do you want?” Anxiety rolled his eyes, as though Thomas had somehow asked the stupidest question in the world.

 

“You tell me. You’re the one who summoned me.” Thomas glanced to Talyn and Joan, but it seemed their faces only reflected his confusion.

 

“No, I didn’t.” Anxiety narrowed his eyes and leaned forward, mouth not quite in a sneer but lip curled.

 

“Uh, yeah. You did. I wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t. So, what do you want?” Thomas bit his lip and thought very hard on what he had done. He could have said it was an accident, and let Anxiety leave again. It would have been a very simple thing to do. But instead, Thomas tried to respond honestly.  _ What did he want from Anxiety? _ Joan opened their mouth, as though to dismiss or further question Anxiety’s presence, but Thomas beat them to it.

 

“I want to learn how to summon a shield.” The black clad side raised an eyebrow.

 

“Why ask me? Tal’s the magic expert.” Talyn scrunched up their face.

 

“Tal?” Thomas kept talking.

 

“When I tried to summon a shield, I summoned you. So now I’m asking you, how do I summon a shield?” Anxiety pressed his lips into a thin line and glared at the floor for a moment. When the side looked up again, he sighed before speaking.

 

“I don’t know what to tell you Sanders, you just gotta do it.” Joan barked out a laugh at that.

 

“Ah, yes, of course! That’s a huge help, thanks An.” This time the side actually did sneer as he glowered towards Joan.

 

“Hey, I told you I wasn’t the magic expert. I don’t know why you guys are asking me this when I’ve done about as much magic as Thomas.”  _ Which is to say he’s done more magic than they know. _

 

“Yeah, okay, that’s fair. Sorry.” It was strange, seeing how confused Anxiety looked after Joan’s apology. It was almost like no one had ever apologized to him before. Thomas didn’t have time to question it before the side spoke again.

 

“Right. So, are you happy? Can I go now?” Joan sat on the couch and looked at Anxiety with a teasing smile.

 

“Aw, why do you wanna leave so badly?” Thomas noticed that this time when Joan spoke, Anxiety paid them no attention. As relaxed and bored as Anxiety tried to seem, all of his attention was fixed on Thomas.  _ Only Thomas could answer his question. _

 

“Actually, how about you stick around Anxiety?” Anxiety looked about as disgusted as he could get.

 

“Why?” The word was drawn out, incredulous and annoyed all at once. Thomas simply smiled and shrugged. 

 

“I tried shield and got you instead. That’s gotta mean something right? So, yeah, stick around and we’ll see what happens.” Anxiety rolled his eyes and leaned back on the stairs. 

 

“Ugh, fine.” Both Talyn and Joan grinned at the childish response. Then, Talyn turned to face Thomas and explained the spell again. They were hoping that maybe repeating the lesson would show Thomas something he hadn’t noticed before. They were hoping that after the third, then the sixth, then the tenth attempt Thomas might feel something different. He tried visualizing the shield in great detail. He tired tensing his fingers and holding them as though he was holding a shield. He tried shouting the spell, then he tried saying it in his head.  He tried hand gestures. He tried closing his eyes. He tried creating a shield around Joan. He wanted to try casting it while holding Anxiety’s hand, but the side refused in a way that made it clear Thomas was not to ask that again. But no matter what Thomas tried, nothing seemed to work. Then, after about an hour of trying really, really hard, Joan said something that captured all of his attention.

 

“Hey Anxiety, who are you texting?” Talyn looked over with furrowed eyes, and Thomas voiced the confusion they were feeling.

 

“Texting? How would he be-” But as Thomas turned to look, there in Anxiety’s hands was a phone. 

 

“I’m not texting.” Joan sat up and shouted back.

 

“Yes you are, we can all see your phone!” Thomas frowned.

 

“Where did you get a phone? I never bought you a phone.” Anxiety sat up and smirked.

 

“Okay first, I’m not texting I’m on tumblr. Second, you didn’t have to buy it. Remember the video you made to introduce me?” As Anxiety spoke he held up the phone for all to see, and with wide eyes Thomas realized that Anxiety was right. It was a perfect copy of the phone from the video.  

 

“Holy shit, I made a phone?!” Joan and Talyn turned to Thomas in shock. 

 

“Damn it Thomas, you made a freakin phone without even realizing it, but when we try to make a shield it’s rocket science?” Thomas knew Talyn was speaking out of sympathetic frustration and not blaming Thomas for anything, but the words still stung a little.

 

“Oh come on, I’m not that hopeless. I’ll get it eventually.” Thomas ignored the way Anxiety scoffed and tried to focus on casting the spell again. He also tried to ignore the way Joan was staring at said phone in total awe, but that was a little more difficult. 

 

“No, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that. You’ll get it eventually, it’s normal for magic to act weird at first.” As the spell once again sputtered out before doing anything useful, Thomas noted that Anxiety had noticed Joan’s staring and was glaring at them. 

 

“I don’t understand why this is so hard!” Thomas felt a little bad for complaining when Talyn gave him a sympathetic smile. Joan noticed that Anxiety had noticed their staring and the two started a staring contest. Thomas tried the spell again. 

 

“Maybe try relying more on your feelings? Like, maybe pretend you’re in danger again?” Thomas tried the spell again. The staring contest was starting to get creepy, but Thomas tried not to comment on it.  

 

“Okay on one hand the emotions thing has been tried, but on the other hand it’s the closest I think I’ve gotten, so maybe I should try that again?” Thomas was very surprised when Anxiety lost the staring contest by rolling his eyes, but when he thought about it that was a very Anxiety thing to do. Joan seemed smug regardless.

 

“This is stupid.” Thomas sighed, but he figured the staring contest could only realistically distract him for so long.

 

“It’s not stupid Anxiety.” The side huffed and shoved his phone into his pocket.

 

“It’s so stupid.” For the first time that day, Thomas copied Anxiety’s sneer.

 

“It’s not-” But Anxiety seemed to have hit his listening limit for the day.

 

“No, it is! You’ve been using your magic for months without even thinking about it, so why are you thinking about it now? All this talk of “feel it in your heart” and “focus on it really hard” or whatever you’ve been doing is never going to work. Just give it up, it’s use- ...it’s not worth trying.” Anxiety balled up his hands and glared at the floor as he finished his rant, and his ending words were oddly quiet compared to the shout he started it with. But Thomas wasn’t as worried about that as he should have been. Instead, Thomas was wide eyed by the revelation Anxiety had just dropped in his lap. 

 

“Oh my gosh, you’re right.” Anxiety raised an eyebrow. 

 

“I am?” Joan smiled widely and held their hand out to Talyn.

 

“Thirty bucks, as promised.” Both Anxiety and his Creator gave the nonbinary friends questioning looks.

 

“What, no, that didn’t prove anything!” Joan’s grin grew impossibly wider.

 

“Oh it absolutely proved it, now pay up.” Talyn stomped their foot, but dug into their purse to hand over the cash. Thomas realized what was happening a second before Anxiety got the message.

 

“Wait, what did you two bet?” Joan laughed as they snatched the money they had earned.

 

“I bet thirty bucks that my characterization of Anxiety was spot on, while Talyn believed that Anxiety was all bad like in his introduction video.” Thomas got a glimpse of wide eyes and an awed expression before Anxiety smoothed his features into the familiar brooding look he wore. But the side’s quick recovery couldn’t hide the fact that he was nearly speechless.

 

“Whatever, pass money around all you want, Thomas still can’t do the spell.” Thomas smiled as he looked at his hands. He relaxed his form and with as much casualness and as little thought as he could muster, Thomas spoke.

 

“Actually… I could really use a  _ shield. _ ” And as the words flowed out of his mouth, a rainbow colored shield of light formed around his arm in the shape of a typical knight’s shield. Anxiety raised an eyebrow in a way that looked unimpressed,  _ but Thomas knew he was secretly proud. _

 

“Oh for fuck’s sake, it was that easy?!” Talyn face planted onto the couch as Joan’s giggles filled the room. Thomas joined in the laughter and collapsed on top of his friends as he dispelled the shield. And as the three’s laughter faded out, and they started discussing the script and what they wanted to add to it, they failed to notice how Anxiety took advantage of the distraction to sink out. 

 

* * *

 

February 13th, 2017 9:46 PM

Virgil laid curled up in his nest of a bed as he gazed up at his galaxy. Filming and editing for the new video had been finished earlier that evening, and the relief of being finished left him drained and drifting. He traced with his eyes the nebula that shifted from blue to pink to purple to indigo and back to it’s peaceful blue. He traced the stars that formed constellations that really only made sense to him. He eyed the mess of stars that held the lightning bolt, then the glasses, then the cat constellation. He traced the castle pattern that he was especially proud of. He wasn’t quite ready to confront the dragon constellation that was in the center, but he knew he’d have to one day. The patterns were so difficult to see because they technically all over lapped each other. He only had so much space to work with, so the same space that held the castle also held a mace if you turned upside down and connected different stars in different ways. And the cat overlapped with the lightning bolt slightly, just as the snake was in between the glasses and the dragon that he wasn’t thinking about. And he knew if he turned he’d be able to trace countless more, but he was comfortable where he was and he didn’t feel like moving. He let the multicolored lines he was using to trace the shapes fade away as he moved on the admiring his comets. 

 

Anxiety found himself lost in empty thoughts until his phone started buzzing. When he checked the caller ID he was only mildly surprised to see Puppet’s name. 

 

“Hey, what’s up Pup?” Emlyn had started to say something, but Anxiety snickered as she completely dropped whatever greeting she had planned.

 

“Is that just a thing with you now? Shortening people’s names out of laziness?” Virgil reached over to his closest stuffed animal, which happened to be a brown dog with a blue shirt and a grey cardigan, and dragged it into the nest of blankets as he laughed.

 

“Hey, you guys started it, Em.” Virgil grinned as he could feel the eye-roll from his bed. 

 

“Alright, bastard, fair enough. I actually called for a reason, I’ll have you know.” He raised an eyebrow, even though he knew she couldn’t see it. 

 

“Oh? An actual reason other than getting a break from Poltergeist Jr. you mean?” Emlyn sighed with the exasperated love of an overworked parent.

 

“Danny is a blessing, but if I get clocked in the head with one more spoon I am going to start eating cereal with a fucking fork.” Virgil rubbed the ears of the dog as he made an amused face.

 

“Spoons?” 

 

“Either Doors or Mel showed them a video of one of those fake fucking psychics that bend spoons and they’ve been trying to copy it ever since. So far the only result has been flinging the spoons across the damn room and increasing the amount of headaches I get.” Virgil idly reached out for another plushy, this time a grey cat with a blue necktie. 

 

“Doors?” Puppet hummed.

 

“A witch who lives in the city Queeny and I work in. Her powers allow her to create portals in doorways. It’s how Mel and I commute to work, and she’s our current babysitter.” Virgil twirled the necktie between his fingers. He liked having things to fidget with mindlessly, it was a shame he could never take this stuff out of his room.  _ He’d rather be hated than mocked. _

 

“So, now that we’ve established that your child belongs in the Matrix, why did you actually call?” Virgil was expecting Em to at least chuckle at the reference, but apparently the reminder of why she had called grabbed her attention instead. 

 

“Okay, so I’ve come up with two suggestions that may help with your situation.” Virgil sat up a little, and he brought the cat plush up to his chest.

 

“What kind of suggestions?” There was the sound of flipping paper, Anxiety assumed she had notes.

 

“First, I think you should get a familiar.” Anxiety furrowed his brows.

 

“A familiar?” Virgil was aware of familiars, but he had never looked into summoning one.

 

“Yeah, I mean, it’d have to be something pretty small of course. And quiet, which makes things a little difficult, but I think the pros outweigh the cons.” Virgil thought it over.

 

“I mean, not that I don’t trust your judgment, but why?” 

 

“Well, a lot of reasons. First, you’re clearly lonely and having something to take care of, that will also take care of you, should help. Second, they’re very good for information gathering and recon. So, let’s say you had to go out for a bit but still wanted to keep an eye on… whoever is keeping you in that situation, you could let your familiar keep watch while you get some air.” Virgil blushed slightly at the callout. He wanted to refuse simply because he could tell the second reason was to help convince him to leave what his friends thought was an abusive home. But, he couldn’t deny that having a familiar like that would be nice. 

 

“I see your point, but what kind of animal should I summon?” Puppet hummed in thought. 

 

“Whatever you think you can hide from your roommates, I guess. Again, small and silent is the way to go, but that doesn’t leave you a lot of options. And I’ll be honest, it isn’t an easy spell by any means. But from the notes you’ve shown me in the past, I think you can handle it.” Virgil looked around his room, struggling for ideas. His eyes landed on his black cat plush with a purple bow, but he tossed the idea almost immediately.  _ Too much noise. What if Dad or Thomas had an allergic reaction? _ His eyes kept moving, until they landed on a black and orange tarantula plush that sat at the edge of his bed nest. 

 

“How difficult would it be to summon a spider familiar?” There was a long period of silence. Then Virgil started to hear the faint wheezing that came with one of Emlyn’s more breathless laughs.

 

“ _ Fucking hell,  _ Virge _ , you serious?” _ He hesitated.

 

“ _ Yes? _ ” The wheezing laugh turned into a full belly laugh, but luckily she responded before Virgil started really panicking at the idea he had said something stupid.

 

“I am now stuck between calling you a badass and hanging up on you.  _ Shit dude,  _ a spider?” Content that Puppet was more creeped out than upset, Virgil shrugged. 

 

“I like spiders. I was thinking like, maybe a tarantula? People have pet tarantulas, right?” There was the familiar sound of Puppet hitting her head against a table or desk before she responded.

 

“Yeah, Storm, people get pet tarantulas. I’ll look into what you need to do it, and I’ll have the spell and ingredient list sent to you by next Tuesday. It might not be a tarantula, strictly speaking, but like, a big ass magic spider. That good enough? Cause like, most familiars are animal in appearance, but with something slightly off.” Virgil grinned.

 

“That sounds perfect! But, uh, how big is a “big ass” spider?” Puppet sighed.

 

“I don’t know, Storm, but most familiars have a minimum size so it can be, you know,  _ actually useful _ on more than a companion level. So if I had to guess, the size of your hand?” Anxiety’s eyes widened and his grin grew.

 

“ _ Perfect.” _ Puppet scoffed good naturedly.

 

“Glad to hear you’ve settled into your  _ scary bitch _ persona. There was one more idea I wanted to run by you.” Virgil bounced slightly and leaned back in excitement. He’d never actually considered having a pet before, but now that the idea was there he realized how much he wanted one. And a spider just seemed right to him. 

 

“Okay, shoot.” Puppet paused.

 

“Are you sitting down?” Anxiety froze.  _ Why- What if- What if- _

 

“Yeah? What’s the idea?” He heard Emlyn take a deep breath. 

 

“I think we should meet up in person.”  _ Anxiety’s thoughts stopped. _


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey look! I got an upload schedule! …sort of. My goal is to post a new chapter within a week of the last one. Meaning, it will probably be once a week, but if I get the chapters written faster I may post them faster. This schedule will stay until the school year starts, and then I may have to adjust based on how intense my work load is. I’m hoping to hit a certain point in the story before that happens, but we’ll see. Enjoy the new chapter lovelies! And feel free to ask questions!

February 16th, 2017 1:24 AM

Anxiety felt his stomach lift slightly as though he was falling, and with a jolt he was in reality. From his perch on the landing of the stairs, he looked out at the pitch dark downstairs of Thomas’s apartment. For a moment he waited, to make sure there was no movement, then he crept towards the front door. He had given Puppet’s suggestion a solid maybe, because he couldn’t answer her question until he knew how far away he could get from Thomas. He stood in front of the door to the outside and put his hand on the handle. But he didn’t open it.  _ What if-  _ A whisper interrupted his thoughts. 

 

“Anxiety?” Anxiety whipped around and flinched back. His instinct was to pull out his blade and it took all of his willpower not to, as he realized it was Joan who had caught him.  _ Pulling out a weapon on one of Thomas’s friends was not an option. _

 

“Gah, you trying to give me a heart attack? Warn a guy next time.” Anxiety spoke in a low whisper to match Joan’s volume, but his shock left the words of his first sentence slurred. He had forgotten that Joan and Talyn had opted to stay the night after how late their movie marathon had gotten. Joan raised an eyebrow and smirked at Anxiety’s words. 

 

“Sorry, so what are you doing up?” Anxiety pressed his back against the door and sneered.

 

“What are you doing up?” Both eyebrows were raised this time. 

 

“I asked you first.” Virgil didn’t have an answer for that.  _ He couldn’t just tell them what he was doing. _ After an extended moment of silence, Joan continued. “You know, I think Orion’s out this time of year.” Anxiety narrowed his eyes, but he knew it was more out of suspicion than genuine malice. 

 

“What?” Joan smiled and leaned against the wall.

 

“Stargazing tends to make me feel calm, same with Talyn. When I saw you sneaking out-”

 

“I wasn’t sneaking.” The lie felt sour on Anxiety’s tongue, but he couldn’t stop the habit from slipping out. Joan’s look said they didn’t believe it for a second.

 

“When I saw you, totally not sneaking out, I figured that if it calms down mine and Talyn’s anxieties, maybe it calms you too. I think the constellation Orion is visible tonight, if it isn’t too cloudy.” Anxiety eyed Joan and shifted his weight in thought. It was a convenient lie, especially since it was one Joan already believed. But it felt too easy. _Too nice._ _What if it was a trap? What if Joan was lying? Why would Joan be nice to him?_ Virgil swallowed passed his fears and spoke.

 

“And you… you won’t tell anyone about this?” Joan laughed quietly.

 

“Anxiety, you know you’re allowed to go outside, right?” His next words slipped out before he could stop them.

 

“Am I?” Joan frowned and straighten up from their slouch against the wall. They had a strange look in their eyes; it was similar to the look Morality gave him sometimes during one of their cookie nights when Anxiety accidentally said something concerning. It made Anxiety’s discomfort grow and he bit down on his tongue. 

 

“Anxiety, are-”  _ He couldn’t let Joan finish that question, because no he was not alright. _

 

“You promise you won’t tell anyone?” Joan stopped and their frown deepened. Anxiety felt bad about cutting them off so harshly, but  _ he couldn’t answer that question. _ Thankfully, Joan seemed to take the hint and dropped the subject.

 

“Yeah. Yeah I promise.” Anxiety nodded, and in one quick motion he spun around, threw the door open, and silently closed it behind him. As though he wasn’t even there. He didn’t check Joan’s expression and he didn’t worry about his rushed exit. No matter his fears about Joan discovering him or toying with him or lying, he knew Joan well enough to know that Joan kept their promises. 

 

He waited around outside the apartments for a few minutes, double checking that Joan would not follow him or check on him at all. Once he was sure that Joan had gone back to bed, or at least given up on finding him, Anxiety turned towards the street and started walking. He wasn’t really walking to any destination in particular, just walking away. He pulled up his phone and looked through a maps app to see if he could find a good spot to meet up with Puppet. It was still a strange and terrifying thought to him.  _ He was actually considering meeting Puppet.  _ She had explained that the easiest way to meet up was if she drove over to see him while Mel stayed at home with Danny. All he had told her was that he lived in Florida, and she was thrilled to reply that she lived in Georgia.  _ Well, they lived in Georgia and worked in South Carolina, so it was still pretty far away, but it could have been much farther.  _

 

Virgil sighed and sat down on a bench near the sidewalk. He wasn’t too worried about being spotted, since it was a little after 2 in the morning. And even if he was spotted, it wasn’t completely unheard of for Thomas to go around filming stuff, so he figured he could cover himself pretty well so long as no one asked for a picture. He leaned back and closed his eyes for a moment, trying to see if he was feeling any different after being this far away from Thomas. So far, he didn’t feel any different, but he did know how far away he was from Thomas. Without even checking his phone, he had known what direction Thomas was in. Virgil looked around at where he was. He looked at the street lights, at the stars that were a little hard to see but not impossible. He looked at the buildings that were growing more sparse. With a sigh, he pulled out his phone and checked his location for parks nearby. He figured there were only so many people willing to visit a park at 3 AM, and that was his kind of people. Or homeless people, he supposed, but they probably wouldn’t mind. He stood up, and started walking to a park with plenty of trees that was nearby. He’d have to convince Puppet to meet him in the middle of the night, but he wasn’t too worried about it. Puppet was the type of person that didn’t take much convincing when it came to things that were sketchy. Not because she was stupid, or because she had done sketchy things before,  _ although he wouldn’t be surprised if she had done some stuff in the past. _ No, she didn’t take much convincing because there were very few people who could actually stand their ground in a fight against her. 

 

It wasn’t until he was at the park, sitting in the grass and looking at the sky, that he realized what was wrong. He wasn’t anxious. Not anxious enough to be noticeable, anyway. He just felt…  _ fine.  _ He felt normal. Almost human. For a moment, Anxiety feared that that meant this meeting place was too far away to use. But after considering it, Virgil realized that this was the perfect place to meet her. For if he were any more afraid than he was right then, he wouldn’t be able to tell her what he really needed to tell her. He’d back out, or lie, or make some excuse. He didn’t want to think about the implications of that. He didn’t want to question his existence and overthink everything. He was always overthinking everything, and for once in his existence he had the choice not to. He pushed the thoughts, the realizations that were right at the edge of being realized, out of his head.  Instead, he laid down in the grass and smiled. 

_ J _ _ oan was right. Stargazing did make him happy. _

 

* * *

 

February 19th, 2017 11:53 AM

“So we’ve decided on motivation for the topic, right? With Logic leading?” Thomas looked up from his laptop as he asked the question. Morality was bouncing on the couch next to him, nodding his head excitedly. Logic smirked as he leaned against the railing of the stairs, pleased with the decision. 

 

“Yes, I suppose I can work with this idea. But Glasses, you can’t be the only person in the video, you know.” Creativity was sat next to the coffee table, scribbling ideas into a notebook. Anything and everything he thought of, he wrote down as possible lines in the script as people spoke inspiration to him. Notes that may or may not be used, considering Joan’s notes were much neater. 

 

“I know that. It’d be illogical to think I’d just be addressing Thomas the whole video.” Logic shot a small glare towards The Prince, but he seemed to let it go soon enough. Creativity ignored any malice he was getting for his comment, and sat up quickly to look at Thomas.

 

“Oh! I’ve got it! Logic can be dressed up as Sherlock Holmes to solve the case of Thomas’s missing motivation!” Thomas grinned. He knew Logic would be excited by that idea. Morality seemed to agree as he shouted out.

 

“Oh! Oh! Can I play Watson? I can help with the deductions!” Logic rolled his eyes but smiled at the playful side.

 

“Don’t be ridiculous Morality, you can’t make deductions. I’m the smart one, remember?” Thomas frowned slightly and he glanced over to where Joan was at the table behind the couch to see that Joan was giving concerned frowns to both Morality and Logic. But before Thomas could step in, the emotional side laughed.

 

“Right, sorry. But I can still dress up as Watson and be in the video, right?” Thomas nodded at Morality’s question. He was still a little concerned about the comment, but if it didn’t bother Morality, then maybe that was just how the sides were? It made sense, he supposed, that since they were only pieces of a human, they had limitations.  _ If that was all that they were, anyway. _ Joan decided to speak up.

 

“Of course you can be Watson, Morality. I think it’d be cute to have the two of you working together.” Logic groaned and rolled his eyes again.

 

“Fine, you can be Watson.” Thomas started typing up the ideas for the script, but Morality’s next words made him pause.

 

“Aw, cheer up Logan! It’ll be fun. You’re still the star of the video.” Thomas lifted his head and looked between Logic and Morality. Logic seemed slightly tense and was glaring at Morality, but the emotional side was still smiling obliviously. 

 

“Logan?” Creativity jerked his head up and stared at Thomas, then looked to Morality in dawning realization. Joan stood up from the table to get a better look at the room. 

 

“Morality!” Logic looked like he was barely containing his anger and Morality looked at everyone confused.

 

“What? What did I do?” Thomas answered before Logic could yell again.

 

“Who’s Logan?” Morality’s eyes went wide. Logic sighed. 

 

“I am. My name is Logan.” Thomas stared at Logic. Joan leaned on the couch with an excited grin, but they did not speak. 

 

“I’m super sorry Logan, I wasn’t thinking and-” Logan sighed and shot a brief glare at Morality before returning his gaze to Thomas.

 

“It’s fine. I don’t particularly care what people address me as. At the very least, my name does not hold the sentimental importance that others might feel towards it, so I’m not that upset. We were going to tell Thomas soon anyway, were we not?” Creativity nodded, but seemed slightly concerned. 

 

“Wait, so all of you have names? What do you mean sentimental importance?” Joan decided to ask the questions that Thomas was still too shocked to ask. Logic provided answers, as he always did.

 

“For us, names hold a different connotation than our titles. It’s similar to the difference between how you would refer to someone in a professional setting verses a personal one. For example, using the name Logic would be like addressing a teacher by their last name. It’s something most people do, and it doesn’t seem weird. But as one becomes friends with the individual, it would be more appropriate to use his first name. But no matter how close you are to the teacher, you’d still refer to them by their last name if you were in a school setting. So, even though within the mindscape, I call him Patton, it’s more appropriate to call him Morality when we are working.” Morality gasped quietly at the reveal, but covered it up quickly and waited for Logic to finish his explanation.

 

“Logan! You just got mad at me for saying yours, why’d you say mine?” Logan smirked and pushed his glasses up.

 

“It’s because you said mine. I figured you wouldn’t mind, right? I mean you were going to tell him anyway.” Patton made an unreadable face, but eventually smiled and nodded.

 

“Yeah, that’s fair.” Creativity stood up and struck his usual pose.

 

“Well, if we’re all doing introductions, you may refer to me as the Magnificent Prince Roman!” Thomas looked up at Creativity- at Roman, and opened his mouth to respond. Nothing came out the first couple of times, until eventually the shock wore off and Thomas smiled. 

 

“Okay. Okay! So, Patton, Roman, and Logan, yes?” He looked at each side as he said their name and he noticed how each seemed to smile as he said it. Joan was also smiling at the scene before them, though Thomas could sense that something was on their mind.  _ He shouldn’t ask, Joan learned their lesson. They would have said something if it was important.  _

 

 “I would not mind being addressed as such from now on, but it may be wise to space out any reveals to the audience.” Logan broke the silence with his suggestion, and Roman sat down to continue notes.

 

“Yes, Logan’s right! We should make it suspenseful, keep them guessing.” Thomas nodded, and made a note of his own. But as he typed something else occurred to him.

 

“So, what’s Anxiety’s name?” All of the sides froze, then gave each other puzzled looks.

 

“I am… unsure. He’s never told any of us to my knowledge,” Logan admitted. Creativity shrugged.

 

“Maybe he doesn’t have a name.” Patton gasped.

 

“Now, don’t be ridiculous kiddo, all of us have names.” Thomas looked around at all of them.

 

“So, what, you guys really don’t even know his name?” Logan shrugged.

 

“It is not as unusual as you might think, Thomas. Even we did not know each others’ names for several years. Names are not necessary when you are simply a function of someone’s subconscious.” Patton smiled.

 

“Logan’s right. The three of us only started using our names regularly a couple years ago or so.” Joan drummed their hands on the back of the couch and looked at each of the sides. They seemed to be thinking about something, and Thomas was saved from having to ask about it by Joan speaking up on their own.

 

“Why don’t we call Anxiety here then? We need his input on the script anyway, and maybe if he sees all of us using your names, he’ll give us his.” Roman pursed his lips and looked hesitant.

 

“Yeah, I wouldn’t get your hopes up, friendo. We’ve gotten kinda lax about it, but names are still important. They’re symbols of trust, and a Grumpy Gus like Anxiety isn’t gonna be tamed that easily.” Thomas wanted to question the use of the word tamed, but Joan argued against Roman’s statement.

 

“Well, even if he doesn’t, we still need him here.” Roman made a face that clearly showed how he felt about that idea. But Roman had long ago lost his right to ban Anxiety from any and all gatherings, so Thomas  _ pulled  _ and summoned Anxiety despite his discomfort. 

 

“What do you want?” Logan flinched away from the stairs as Anxiety appeared with a  _ jolt _ . Thomas leaned over his laptop and raised his eyebrows at the position the darker side was in. Anxiety was laying down on the stairs with his legs towards the top and his head hanging over the landing. He had one arm under his head while his other hand held his phone that he was scrolling on. 

 

“We’re discussing scripts and names, and your participation is mandatory.” Anxiety scrunched his face at Joan’s words.

 

“Why?” Joan turned and went into the kitchen, presumably to find food.

 

“Because fear is involved loosely with procrastination, and also I wanna know what your name is.” Thomas watched Anxiety stop his scrolling and narrow his eyes at his phone. 

 

“You aren’t getting my name, but sure I’ll sit and listen to your stupid banter if you really want me to.” Logan raised his eyebrows.

 

“You call that sitting?” Anxiety immediately shot back.

 

“You call that contributing?” Thomas cleared his throat and tried to take control of the situation.

 

“Okay, okay, let’s get back on task, yes? Logic will be Sherlock, Morality will be Watson, and they will be deducing the source of my missing motivation, which will be…?” Creativity shouted out his answer.

 

“It’ll be Anxiety, of course.” Morality made a face that showed he wasn’t sure about that, and Thomas had to agree.

 

“Actually, Roman, while Anxiety does have a part to play in causing procrastination, I think it would be too simple if we made Anxiety the only cause to discover.” Roman looked at the logical side.

 

“What?!” Anxiety smirked.

 

“I’m not always the bad guy, Princey.” Joan’s voice called out from the kitchen.

 

“I’m writing that down!” Anxiety groaned loudly and shouted back.

 

“Fuck off Joan!” No one was particularly concerned by this, as these words had passed over their heads several times already. It had started when Joan first made the comment about putting Anxiety’s magic advice in the Valentine's Day video. Morality had long since given up on chastising the two for their language.

 

“Okay, so I’ll put down Anxiety as the initial suspect, but we need to decide the culprit if it isn’t…?” Anxiety didn’t even wait.

 

“You aren’t getting my name, Sanders.” Thomas sighed and lowered his head.

 

“Alright, ideas?” The rest of the afternoon passed by like that. Creativity would shout out an idea. Either Logic or Joan would poke holes in the idea until it because usable. Morality would chime in with jokes or minor suggestions when he could. And Anxiety would give annoyed sass whenever prompted for advice or asked for his name. Most of his sass was directed at Joan, as Joan was the main one to give sass back. Creativity’s comments were less sass and more hostile attacks, so Thomas decided those didn’t count. After most of the plot was outlined, and Joan had grabbed a couple more lines from Anxiety to the side’s great annoyance, Anxiety vanished. Thomas thought it was the last name question that pushed him over the edge, but it could also have been a time thing. He wasn’t really sure. It wasn’t that much later that Patton said his farewells as well. And gradually, as more things were finalized on the script, Logan and Creativity also said their goodbyes and sank out. Then, it was just Thomas and Joan sitting on the couch going over lines. 

 

“Hey Thomas?” Thomas glanced away from his laptop to see Joan looking at him strangely.

 

“Yeah Joan?” It wasn’t unusual for him and Joan to have serious conversations, as they were best friends, but Thomas wondered what had triggered the shift in mood. 

 

“Are you okay?” Thomas looked up from his computer properly and smiled at Joan. 

 

“Yeah, I mean,” Thomas laughed, “I think I’m doing pretty great actually. Look how productive we were today! Why do you ask?” Joan smiled back at Thomas, then they looked at the stairs with that same concerned look in their eyes. But Thomas couldn’t think of what they would be concerned about. 

 

“If you say so.” 

 

* * *

 

February 20th, 2017 12:24 AM

Patton was having a… less than stellar evening. He had tried to be his usual self. Had tried not to be petty about it. But he just couldn’t get the words out of his head. And it was with those words stuck swimming in his mind that he snuck downstairs to bake some cookies. He managed to get through most of the baking process before he broke. He even got the cookies in the oven and set the timer as tears started falling down his face. But as the hands-on portion ended, and the waiting began, Patton leaned against the counter and released the wave of sobs that had been building in his chest. His sobs were so intense that he didn’t notice the footsteps until a quiet voice whispered to him.

 

“Dad?” Patton jumped up and quickly tried to wipe his tears away. 

 

“Hey, kiddo, uh- rough night?” When Patton turned to face Anxiety, the first thing he noticed was how serious Anxiety looked. Anxiety was staring at him, looking him up and down as though trying to deduce what had happened. Patton resisted the urge to start crying again as he was reminded of that afternoon. He tried to smile, as he waited for Anxiety to say something. He expected the other side to change the subject, as he was prone to do when they were both upset. While it was true that Patton had seen the younger side close to tears, their positions had never truly been reversed before. But Anxiety did not speak. Instead, as Patton opened his mouth to say something else, Anxiety walked right up to the fatherly side, took each of his hands in the dark side’s own, and pressed his forehead against Patton’s. Patton blinked in surprise, but Anxiety squeezed his eyes shut and did not say a word. 

 

“Uh, kiddo? What are you- Whatcha doing?” Patton swallowed back his tears as Anxiety rubbed his thumbs over the fatherly side’s knuckles. 

 

“I’m, um, I’m comforting you?” Anxiety whispered his answer like it was another question, and Patton’s heart swelled.

 

“Oh.” Patton sniffled and squeezed Anxiety’s hands in return. 

 

“Am I- I mean is this- I’ve never-” Patton closed his eyes and nestled his forehead against the other as he failed to repress more tears. 

 

“Yeah, yeah this helps kiddo.” Patton heard Anxiety breathe out a sigh of relief and he couldn’t help but smile at how sweet the gesture was. For several minutes, they stood there just like that. Patton basked in the comfort of light physical contact, and Anxiety provided the illusion of privacy by keeping his eyes closed the whole time. It took Patton a couple minutes to figure out that was why Anxiety kept his eyes closed, but when he realized the reasoning, it caused new tears to fall in gratitude. It was the strangest comfort session Patton had experienced, but it was effective all the same. Maybe even more effective. Eventually, when the tears stopped and when Patton felt his face had cleared up enough to not be worrying, Patton pulled away with a smile. It was only then that Anxiety opened his eyes. 

 

“Um… better?” Patton nodded with a wide smile, and the timer for the cookies vibrated. 

 

“Oh! I’ll, uh, I’ll get out the cookies and then we can talk, okay?” Anxiety nodded and hopped up to sit on the counter as Patton went to get the cookies out. They spent a couple minutes in silence before Anxiety decided to ask.

 

“So… you wanna talk about it?” Patton sighed as he put a few cookies on a plate and brought it over. Normally he frowned upon sitting on counter tops, but just this once he decided maybe it would be fitting to join his dark son in his strange sitting positions. He placed the plate between them as he got up on the counter.

 

“I… is Logic right?” Anxiety frowned as he picked up a cookie.

 

“About what?” Patton sighed and bit into a cookie before answering. Anxiety fidgeted in the silence.

 

“Am I… Logic said I couldn’t help with deducting because he’s the smart one. So… Anxiety am I stupid? Am I just- just doomed to be stupid because I’m not Logic?” Patton refused to look at Anxiety as he finished his question. Instead, he stared at the ground as he nibbled on his second cookie. 

 

“Morality-” Maybe Patton wanted to delay what he feared. Maybe he just couldn’t stand the thought of his kiddo being so formal after all this time. But he interrupted all the same.

 

“Patton.” Anxiety paused and looked confused. “You can call me Patton.” Anxiety’s eyes widened, then softened at the confession. 

 

“Patton… Patt, I’m Anxiety. I am the literal embodiment of fear and nerves and I just- … I comforted you. So no, I don’t think Logic’s right. I think Logic’s right about a lot of things, but he definitely isn’t right about this. Unless you’re secretly pretending to be calm and are actually super scared right now.” Patton laughed and shook his head. Tears were building in his eyes, but for the first time all day they were happy tears. 

 

“No, no I’m not pretending.” Anxiety smirked.

 

“So yeah, if I can do something like that, then you can be smart.” Patton smiled and held up a cookie as though he was cheering.

 

“To defying titles.” Anxiety’s eyes widened, but he too smiled and raised a cookie to meet Patton’s.

 

“To defying titles.” Patton giggled, and to his immense joy, Anxiety gave a small laugh as well. It was quiet, and barely there, but Anxiety laughed. And as the two sides sat on the counter laughing and trading puns, Patton realized that despite the painful start, he wouldn’t have changed a thing about that day. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Telling this story is fun. It’ll be even more fun proving that while this may seem familiar, magic can change reality in ways you might not expect.


End file.
